Over My Head (My Confessions)
Over My Head (My Confessions)
Tagline: Everyone knows I'm in over my head and I don't know what to do to but to give my confessions.
Summary: When the pressures of being unable to conceive slowly derails their relationship, Arizona chooses to take a break. She heads to Africa to work as a missionary, saving lives of the tiny humans. Yet, little to every one's knowledge, including her own, she takes a little something of Callie's with her. Now seven months later, Callie's world is turned upside down by the arrival of her ex-girlfriend and the tiny human growing inside of her. Can Callie find forgiveness for the mother of her child? Or is it simply too late?
Warning: AU Season 7
Pairing: Callie/Arizona. Teddy/Owen. Addison/Derek/Meredith.
Disclaimer: All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.
“I can sum up everything I have learned about life in three words: it goes on.”- Robert Frost.
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Chapter Twelve
Callie is not even sure the moment that she got off her knees and onto her feet, the moment that she swallowed the self-pity and rose to face the reality she has so desperately been trying to avoid in that chapel. She cannot recall if she dozed on Mark's shoulder, when she last ate, or what her last comprehendible thought was. She is not even sure how she found the strength to simply breathe after everything that has happened in the past twenty four hours. However, despite her unawareness of her own ability to function, she is. Living, breathing, walking; all the things that she was not necessarily so sure that she would do again after witnessing the scene in the operating room.
She almost swears she has somehow stumbled into someone else's life, like she stumbled into one of those soap operas that her Abuela used to watch when she was a child. Because this, well this is just so dramatic and out of human comprehension, that it could not possibly be her life. The idea that the person that she loved more than anything in this world could have kept the truth from her in such a way is almost unrealistic. It is implausible to even begin to think that her soul mate very well could die along with their daughter, born a month too early. Their daughter that she did not even know existed. And the more she thinks of it, the more she tries to make sense of it, the more it only just sends her head spinning.
Callie feels like a zombie now, her body protesting every movement that she makes with a cracking of her joints and radiating pain that washes over her in waves. She feels like she got hit by a truck. At the thought of this, Callie chuckles as she pushes a strand of her jet black hair behind her ear, maybe that is because she figuratively had gotten hit by a truck; the truck of life. She chuckles again, glancing around at the people near her who only look at her skeptically. She is sure that she looks crazy and God knows she might as well be; because, nothing about this situation is remotely sane at all.
Pushing herself forward, Callie finds herself standing just outside the nurse's station directly across from Arizona's room. Upon realizing where she is Callie's heart instantly sinks. As much as she wishes that she could ignore this, that she could pretend that this is not real, she knows that she cannot anymore. Arizona is in that room, just like Arizona was lying on that table. Arizona is in the mist of hanging precariously between life and death. And even though Callie is so disgusted and angry with her right now to the point of almost hatred, the thought of losing her completely shatters her to the core of everything that she is.
Her knees begin to tremble beneath her as her palms grow sweaty and coldness drips down the nape of her neck. It only takes a matter of moments before her body erupts in goosebumps and those all too familiar tears prick within the corner of her eyes. Callie Torres has always been the best at avoidance, of locking her heart away, because pretending like you do not have one prevents it from being broken so easily. However, in this moment, as the dark reality falls in around her, Callie is shattering far deeper than any repair could ever fix.
It is not some patient in that room, not someone who she will see only once or twice before they go on with the rest of their lives and she moves on to another patient. No. This person lying in there is not some strange face from a strange place; this person is Arizona. Arizona. The mother of her child, the love of her life, the one person she never imagined that could ever be in a position like this. It is Arizona. And the more she repeats it inwardly, the more she finds herself struggling to breathe.
The past seven months have been hell for her. Hell, in the sense, that she has been stuck, painfully and emotionally stuck. Arizona, the woman who she was meant to spend the rest of her life with, up and left her for Africa and a missionary because she could not take the pressure of their life anymore, Arizona is the one who broke her trust and broke her heart. Yet, despite the façade that she, along with the help of Mark and Addison, has so desperately put up for the past seven months, she could not hate her.
Because despite all the crap that someone might put you through, at the end of the day, love is the only thing that remains. When you love someone, truly and deeply, the way that Callie loves Arizona, neither time nor distance nor betrayal could ever make her feel anything less.
"Callie." It is Teddy who speaks her name now. Callie looks up from the floor she had been staring at to find the fragile cardio surgeon leaning against the desk, her body showing just how exhausted and worry-ridden the woman is. Just from the glance, Callie can tell that she has been crying and that she has not slept even a minute in the past twenty four hours; not that she can blame her, because she is exactly the same. Callie sighs tiresomely as she licks her dry, cracked lips, nodding her head in acknowledgement.
"Hi Teddy," Callie exhales, making sure to direct her eyes anywhere but the room in which her lover lies. Instead, she focuses on Teddy Altman's face, possibly harder than she ever has in her entire life. She does not approach her, however, but rather stands at the opposite end of the desk. Absently, she taps her nails against the top as she shifts her weight nervously.
"Did you go home last night?" asks Teddy with a skeptical gaze, attempting to make some form of communication with the woman. To this, Callie simply shakes her head, her wandering eyes glancing over to the windows of the room.
"No. I… I stayed here. F-figured that the baby…" But she trails off into a mere whisper. Teddy nods quietly, understanding far too well the inability to have the strength to even speak about the situation. Instead of saying anything, Teddy takes a considerate step toward the raven haired beauty in hopes of comforting her, in proving to her that she is not alone.
"How is the baby?" Teddy inquires and Callie looks at her with a simply shake of her head.
"How stupid does that sound?" laughs Callie bitterly, "someone is actually asking me about how my baby is. I never…I never thought someone would ever ask me that. And now chances are…"
"Callie, don't go there." Teddy scolds softly but Callie shakes her head, twisting her fingers in her curls, tugging gently to create another source of pain than the one that is currently radiating in the core of her heart. She does not know how patient's families do this, how they walk around so calm and believing, how they can put the lives of their loved ones in doctor's hands without knowing all the odds. She knows these doctors, she works with them on a daily basis, and she knows how extraordinary they are, but still, even the top notch doctors at Seattle Grace-Mercy West are not enough to soothe her nervousness of the unknown. She wants to know everything, every tiny detail, about the baby, about Arizona.
"I mean, it's true. That baby…" Callie trails off, biting her bottom lip as the tears prick within her darkened eyes, "Addie doesn't... She is not exactly sure of the extent of her injuries just yet. But it's obvious that the crash has had some effects on her. She was born in distress and she is weeks early. She's so small and fragile. I couldn't even hold her…" Once again Callie's voice trails off as the cry tickles in the back of her throat. She inhales deeply, fighting off the cry desperately before continuing once more, "it's not…the baby might not make it." Callie looks up with teary eyes to find Teddy listening ever so intently, her lips pursed softly as the familiar tears form within her own emerald jades.
"I don't even understand how this could be happening. One second she's in Africa and I'm here, screwing up my life, lying to everyone that I am okay, that I don't love her, that I have moved on. I'm forcing myself into OR's and drowning myself in alcohol. And then the next thing I know she's here and she has a baby. My baby. And now they both might die." Callie chokes out, a cry escaping from within her and Teddy takes another careful step toward her.
"I have wanted this baby forever. Forever. How could she just keep something like that from me? How could she think that was okay? How could she just make this… this life decision that involved me, that involved my child without even consulting me on the matter? What made her think that she was so perfect that she could just play God with me and my daughter's life? Huh? And now my daughter is born far too early and she might die because of her. How could she even think that anything about this is remotely okay?" cries Callie, the tears falling from her eyes freely now and Teddy shakes her head quietly, staring absently at her shoes.
"It's not like that."
"Then what the hell is it like? Huh? Did she just wake up one day and decide that I am too much of a selfish bitch to be involved in my daughter's life? Did she just decide one day that she was going to stick it to me for not going to Africa with her? I mean, who does that? Who just decides that their baby is better off without their other parent? And who the hell is she to put herself and our daughter in danger like that? Please, Teddy, do tell me what it is like for Arizona. Because right now, everything that I ever thought I knew about her or life in general, has been shot to hell." Callie shakes her head with a hardened groan.
"And who the hell are you to know about this? To know about my baby and not tell me, huh? You could… you could have prevented this whole thing! You could have talked her out of getting on that plane and both Arizona and my daughter might not be in danger right now. She is mydaughter. You know, Arizona keeping this baby from me really hurts. But maybe on some level I can understand it, given how we left things. But you… you, the person who is supposed to be my friend, kept this from me? I don't even… I don't even know who you are anymore, Altman." Callie snaps, snarling her nose in disgust with a hard laugh before she turns on her heels in her famous swagger of a storm off. However, when the next words fall from Teddy's lips, Callie's world seems to come to a screeching halt.
"Are you not even going to ask about her?" Stopping just short on her heels, Callie turns slightly; looking over her shoulder at the disheveled woman left standing behind her.
"Are you really going to do this? Are you really going to let your own selfishness come in the way of this? Arizona got on that damn plane to come back for you, even though she was making so much difference in Africa, she was making so much strides in the health care for children and she was saving lives, which is something that woman lives for. She was living her dream. But she came back for you. God knows why, you never appreciate her. You never try to see things from her perspective and you never try to compromise with her. But she wanted to be with you. She wanted to raise this child with you. So, she gave up her dream and she got on that plane and she came back for you. So you could have a family. And now you're standing here, not giving a damn about her because of your own stupid pride. I mean, really, Callie, is this the person that you want to be? Is this the example you want to set for you daughter?" Teddy tirades, her emotions finally bursting through. Theodora Altman has never been the one for public scenes and drawing attention to herself, but suddenly, her own self-awareness is lost to the wind as she stares at the woman before her.
"Yeah, what Arizona did was unfair and it was cruel of her to keep this baby from you, especially knowing how badly you wanted one. But given the way you acted before the two of you broke up, given the way that you are acting now, do you really blame her? Maybe she was trying to protect the baby from you, have you ever thought about that?" Teddy exclaims, her voice cracking. Callie's lips part to say something, however, the strong blond speaks up, stopping her from even speaking.
"My God, Callie! She was in a plane crash. She was in a plane crash coming back to you. Doesn't that mean anything to you? Anything at all? She might die; do you even care about that? Do you even care that she might die because she was coming back to give you a second, or excuse me, third chance? Does that even mean anything? Does she mean anything to you? Because that woman, the woman who loves you despite your imperfections, is lying in there, fighting for her life and you are seriously not even going to ask about her? You are not even going to go in there and sit with her when she needs you the most? Because what? Because you're hurt? Reality check, Callie: Arizona is a hell of a lot more hurt than you are right now." Teddy rants and Callie shakes her head vigorously as she takes a threatening step toward the woman, pushing her back into the nurses' station.
"Where the hell do you get off thinking that you know anything about me? Who the hell are you to talk about Arizona like…?"
"She needs you." Callie shakes her head with a bitter laugh at Teddy's statement.
"If she needed me then she would not have disappeared to Africa without a trace. If she loved me she would not have kept this baby a secret from me. If she really gave a damn like you say she does, she would not have done any of this to either of us. But she did. And it just goes to show you, that Arizona Robbins is certainly not the person that you think she is." Callie roars and Teddy looks at her in amazement that she could even push things this far.
"You are hurt. And you are saying things you don't mean."
"Screw you. The both of you." Callie chuckles in disgust, turning to walk away. Yet, Teddy's cool fingers upon her wrist stop her just short as the Army blonde shoves her back into the nurses' station with surprising strength, her emerald jades glaring into her.
"It's your fault. It is your fault that she is laying in there barely clinging to life. It is your fault that she is so miserable. Every day in Africa she was miserable, she was missing you, she was worrying about you. God even knows why that woman cares about you, but she does and look where that has got her. She got on that plane to be with you, not anyone else. You, Callie Torres. It is your fault that is lying in there, it is your fault that your baby might die, because you were too selfish to put your damn pride aside and admit that you were wrong. And she needs you, she needs you now more than ever and you are blowing her off because you think you are so much better than her. But you guys are partners, you are equal, you are equal in this nonexistent relationship that you have. You are no better than her. She needs you and you are bailing on her, you are bailing because that's what you do. You pushed George away, you pushed Erica away and now you're making sure as hell that Arizona doesn't get anywhere near you. That woman is amazing and she deserves better than this crap that you are trying to do to her. Because God knows if it was you in there, she would be sitting with you, every second of every day to make sure that you are okay." Teddy stops short, inhaling deeply.
"But you don't care about her. And maybe you never have. And you never will. Because all you care about is yourself. What makes Callie happy, what makes Callie feel this way or that way. You don't care about anyone else, you don't open your eyes to see things from different perspectives or try to compromise with her. You don't do any of that. You're selfish and you're a bitch and you are wrong, you areso wrong in this situation. She is in there, fighting for her life and you don't give a damn about her because you are too busy playing the victim card, what you're best at doing. So really, I hope that works out for you. I really do. I hope that you can live with yourself knowing what happened, I hope that you can look at yourself in the mirror and you can still love yourself because the only person who will ever love you is yourself." Teddy breathes heavily as she pins her hard against the nurses' station with aggression.
"All I have to say is you better pray to God that she lives. Because if something happens to her and that baby… God might be able to forgive you, but I certainly will not. And I'll make sure you pay for it. Just the way that you are making sure she pays for what she's done. You better pray, hard, Callie. Because I promise you, I will destroy you. Now you better go in there and see her, because she needs you. And somewhere inside this pathetic excuse of a heart you have, I know you care about her. And you'll regret it if you don't." Teddy exclaims with a hard glare, pushing her once again back into the desk, before she turns and storms away.
Callie watches her for the longest moment, unsure of whether to storm after her and go all "cage fighter" on her ass or what the proper protocol would be for this situation. However, as much as a part of her wants to beat the crap out of her, she does not. She doesn't because she can't. She cannot move or breathe or think or do any other bodily function, because her body and her mind is too much wrapped around that woman lying in there as Teddy's words echo in her head.
"My God, Callie. She was in a plane crash. She was in a plane crash coming back to you. Doesn't that mean anything to you? Anything at all? She might die; do you even care about that? Do you even care that she might die?"
"It's your fault. It is your fault that she is laying in there barely clinging to your life."
Suddenly, it all crashes into the raven haired woman as her knees quiver beneath her. Teddy is right. Arizona might very well die; she might very well die because she was on that plane coming back to her, to give her a chance with the baby that she so desperately wanted. Arizona is clinging to her life by a very fine thread, a thread that could snap at any moment and she would have to live with knowing that it is partly her fault. Her fault that her love, that her Arizona is fighting for her life. If she had just picked up the phone, if she had written one email, if she had taken one flight, if she would have done something, anything, maybe, maybe all of this could be just a little different.
Unconsciously, her knees give way beneath her as she slowly sinks to the floor, her hand cupping her mouth as silent cries shakes through her body. The tears fall fiercely down her cheeks as her body quakes through the hushed cries, her mind clouded with the endless worst case scenarios, with guilt and blame. A heart wrenching sob erupts from her as she stares through the glass into the room of the very vulnerable and weak woman.
Even though she is so angry with her and even though she wishes that she could hate her, she just simply cannot. Even after everything that has happened, after the lies, the deceit, the heart break, after everything, she still loves Arizona Robbins with every breath, with very fiber of her being, no matter how hard she tries to fight it.
Crouching in the floor as the cries free her from the chains that once bound her, Callie Torres looks in helplessly at Arizona and the rhythmic heart motor above her head. Her entire world is slowly falling apart around her as she cries alone now, like so many times before. Trembling, she extends a hand outward toward the woman as she gasps in loudly a frantic breath of air, crying desperately and heart wrenching.
"Please live for me, Arizona. Please. Don't you dare die on me and our baby. We need you. Do you hear me? We need you. I need you. Don't you dare die on me. Please. God. Oh God. Arizona. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Callie wallows, sinking further onto the floor. She sulks down, pulling her knees up to her chest as she wraps her arms around them, staring into the room as the tears slide down her cheeks. She does not know what she is going to do but she knows that she has to figure it out soon, and fast.
Teddy Altman paces back and forth in the vent room, the burning tears clouding her vision as every step is becomes more powerful, more emotionally driven than the last. Her mind is racing thousand miles per hour, each thought only staying a mere nanosecond before bouncing hastily to another and then to another. Her heart is pounding, leaping into her throat with each fragile beat. Her blood is pulsing heavily through her veins, so hard that she can feel it rushing through her head with every beat of her heart.
How could this be happening? How could everything be so screwed up like this? How could everything go wrong so fast? It was a simple flight; one that is made a thousand times a year with no accidents or reported failures. It was one simple flight from Africa to Seattle with a few stops along the way. It was one simple flight that was supposed to bring a very pregnant Arizona back to Callie, back to her. A flight that was supposed to bring her best friend back to her so that she could smack some sense into her, tease her about her annoying habits but ultimately understand everything about her. This wasn't supposed to happen.
But it did happen. Arizona's plane did crash, putting both her and her baby's life in peril. Arizona is barely clinging to life and her newborn daughter is fighting off trauma of her own. And she did just go off on Callie for being selfish and heartless and just… Teddy groans as she pushes her fingers through her hair. This wasn't supposed to happen but it did and now she's dealing with all alone.
"Damn it, Arizona! How could you do this? How could you do this to me? How could you do this and leave me here to deal with it all by myself?" Teddy shouts to no one, her voice barely audible over the roaring of the fans. In her urge of anger, she kicks the pole hard; however, it does not budge. Raging with upwelling emotions, the Army Barbie kicks the pole again and again and again and again. She kicks it until she has no strength or willpower left in her body. Biting her bottom lip to suppress the tears, Teddy shakes her head wildly, lifting her foot to kick it again, except this time, a pair of arms wrap around her and she is pulled into the most intoxicating scent.
The scent instantly relaxes her, her muscles loosing as she falls into the pair of muscular arms she has known to love so much.
It's Owen.
Like all the times before, her body naturally gives into him, her tiny frame fitting against his broad muscular chest. It is an instinctual action that her tiny hands press into the arch of his back as his own scarred and rough hands rub along her back soothingly. He softly hums a calming rhythm in the back of his throat; just like he had done all those nights they spent in their sand filled hell. Her body fits perfectly into his and for the briefest second the entire world falls away. For the briefest second, it is only Teddy and Owen, Owen and Teddy, for the split moment, nothing else matters.
Looking up under her long eyelashes, Teddy finds his familiar blue eyes, eyes that are tainted much like her own, with all the damage and trauma seen in lands far away. His face is jagged with small scars from the accident in Iraq; gently her fingers trace the scar on his cheek, her skin softly dancing against his. She hears him inhale a sharp breath, his eyes focused solely upon hers.
However, for as quick as the brief moment came, it passes when the reality crashes back into the Army blonde when the vent blasts a gust of air around her, snapping her attention back.
Arizona. The baby. The accident. Flat lining. Almost death. Arizona. The baby. Callie. Truths. Lies. Betrayal. Secrets. So many damn secrets. Arizona. Callie. Owen. So much. Just so damn much.
Before the weathered woman realizes what she is doing, her fists are pounding into Owen's muscular chest, hard and fast. Before it takes time to register in her exhausted brain, she is beating him, pushing him away, and fighting against his embrace.
"Teddy! Teddy! Hey, hey, stop it. Stop it. Stop!" Owen commands, grabbing her shoulders in a hard squeeze but the blond only shakes her head, taking stumbling steps back. Her eyes are widened, filled with tears and worriment, a distance within them suddenly that almost scares Owen. This person standing before him now, clearly shattered and broken and damaged, this woman is not Teddy, at least, not the Teddy that he has grown to know. He takes a complacent step toward the blonde but Teddy takes another precarious one away from him, pushing out her hand to stop his advances.
"I can't do this." She whispers and Owen only wrinkles his brow in confusion.
"Do what? What can't you do?" Teddy rolls her eyes at the man's question, as if it was so unreal that he could ask such a thing. She groans, shaking her head as a gush of air followed by a saddened whimper escape from her pursed lips, her eyes staying focused on his.
"I can't do this. This, Owen! God, don't you get it? I can't get close to you because…."
"Because why?" Owen pushes, determined to get the blonde to speak what is on her mind. He has known Teddy Altman to put up walls before, to pull away, to guard herself from the rest of the world. However, he has never seen her so blatantly distraught and lost before, he has never seen her like this, not even after the worst cases.
"THIS!" Teddy practically shouts with a failing of her arms to gesture around the vent room with a bark, "I can't get close to you, I can't be your friend because the last time I was somebody's friend I…." she stops just short and instantly Owen's heart plummets to his stomach. He shakes his head softly as he takes another fragile step toward her but the blond only shakes her head, licking her cracked lips.
"Teddy no… it's… it's not…" whispers Owen in a hushed tone, taking another careful step toward her. However, Teddy is having none of it and she takes another powerful and symbolic step back away from the man, pushing her hand outward to stop his advances with a slanting of her eyes.
"Arizona is dying in there, do you know that? I mean, of course you know that by now because at this hospital everyone does not know how to mind their own business! She is lying in there, fighting for her life, and it is my fault! My fault! She was the one who called me. She called me. She told me her plan; she asked about the flight, she asked if it was okay and I told her yes. I told her yes, Owen." Teddy's voice breaks as the most heart wrenching cry bellows from somewhere deep within her.
"I told my best friend that it was a good idea to board a plane, even though I knew how far along in her pregnancy she was. I was the one who told her this was okay! I should have told her no! I should have told her to stay there until after the baby was born o-or to tell Callie and C-Callie would come to her. I should have told her to stay. But instead, I tell her that it's okay. And that damn plane went down and she and her daughter are fighting to live. Because I couldn't grow a pair and tell her that she should stay!" Teddy rants, gasping for a breath that does not come easily to her and Owen only watches with weary eyes.
"Teddy, I don't… there is no way that you could have known about that plane. In a different scenario, this was a good idea. You had no reason to tell her no. It should have been a simple flight from Africa to Seattle, she should have been fine, Torres should have been reunited with her, they should…. You couldn't have known." Owen tries to speak up but Teddy only stares blankly at the ginger, the tears falling effortlessly down her pale and meek face. Teddy is a ghost now, an indignant memory of the woman that she had once been.
"I should have told her no. Who does that? I mean, who tells their best friend that it is a good idea to board a plane when that friend is eight months pregnant? Even if the plane had not crashed, she could have gone into premature labor, or she could have…. She could have…."
"Teddy, you can't work yourself up like this."
"I told Callie. I mean, I told her." Teddy stops, pinching the bridge of her nose with a chuckle, a sound that seems extremely out of place at a moment like this and Owen only watches, befuddled at the unraveling mess of the woman before him, his lips slightly pursed as he struggles to find the words to say.
"Arizona asks me to do one thing. One fucking thing and I cannot even do it. She didn't want Callie to know. At least, not at first. Things were…things were hard and she tried… God… she wanted it to work out so bad. She wanted her and Callie to be together and raise that baby together but then Callie…. She didn't want her to know. Not because she felt like Callie didn't deserve to know but she… she didn't want to fuck up her life. She was… she didn't want her to feel obligated; she knew that their relationship was over and she wanted Callie to move on. So, she asked me not to tell… and then it was too late, too late in the pregnancy and things were too far gone and… she asked me not to tell. And what's the first goddamn thing I tell her when I realize about the accident?" Teddy chuckles again, this time a more sick and twisted laugh than before and Owen merely watches, unsure rather to speak up or to simply stand back until the blonde reached the bottom.
"She asked me not to tell her and the first thing that comes out of my mouth when I realize Arizona is hurt is about the baby. Her baby. And now she's running around this hospital, freaking out about her kid, her kid that she didn't even know about, that she wasn't supposed to know about. That kid is Arizona's. And I blurted it out and now she's pissed at me and I betrayed Arizona, I couldn't even do the one thing she asked me to!" Teddy continues her venting, pacing as she tangles her hair deeper in her hair.
"And then, I corner Callie near the nurses' station and tell her it's her fault. How fucked up is that? I cornered her, Owen. What the hell? Am I back in high school or something? And she is the sophomore girl who kept calling me horse face? I fucking cornered her like some barbaric animal, got in her face and screamed at her about how this is all her damn fault, how it is her fault if Arizona dies and it's fault about the baby. I was going to punch her. I was seconds away from hitting her. What the hell? I don't hit people! And even if I did, hitting Torres sure as hell is not going to bring Arizona back and it is not going to fix anything!" Teddy stops with a weak chuckle and a hard cry.
"And besides, it's not even her fault. Some of it is. Like the fact that is a complete and utter ass who refuses to deal with her damn problems and expects everyone to feel sorry for her, regardless of the situation because she has it so much harder than everyone else and always plays the victim card. Yeah, that is her fault. But this accident…. Arizona… the baby… it's not her fault. And who the hell am I to tell her that it is?"
"Then… then there's you. We can't do this, Owen. I can't do this. I can't get close to you, I can't let you be my best friend because everyone who gets close to me, always ends up leaving. They always end up getting hurt. And I am not letting you do that. I am not letting you get close to me and then end up getting hurt because of this stupid curse or whatever is going on with me. I… I won't do that to you." Teddy snaps in a gasp, the bellowing cry escaping from her and Owen sighs deeply, shaking his head slightly. His lips move but no words come out; because, what words could he say? What words could ever express everything that he is feeling inside, what words could actually soothe the disheveled mess of this beautiful woman in front of him.
"You aren't going to lose me." Owen states rather matter-of-factly, his blue eyes focused on her emerald jades. Teddy shakes her head weakly, her cheeks red and tear stained as she sniffles, her ragged and exhausted body practically slumping in fatigue. The roar of the vents surround them, crashing around the silence.
"You don't know that. You can't say that because you don't know… you don't…"
"I am not going to leave, Teddy. I will never leave you. I promise. I won't. And neither will Arizona. And I know that you think this is your fault but it's not. You didn't know about the accident, there is no way that you could have predicted this. And there is no way that you could have known, do you hear me? And Arizona, she wouldn't… she wouldn't want you to blame yourself for this. She would want you to pull yourself together and take care of yourself, take care of Callie and that baby. And Callie… Callie's going to blame you and she's struggling, but she won't hate you forever. And it's not her fault either, it's not her fault that Arizona left, it's not her fault that she was on the plane. I know, I know how hard this is right now, how hard it is to breathe, to think, but I promise you, everything is going to be okay. Everything is going to be just fine, okay?" Owen exclaims as he cups Teddy's face in his hands, gently brushing her tears away with his thumbs.
"Arizona's not going to leave you. I'm not going to leave you. We have been through too much together for me to leave you. We've been through war together, Teddy, and we've been through heart ache, we've loved and we have lost together. We've been through it all and I haven't left your side. Not even for a second. Not even when you hated me or I was upset with you. I was with you, always. Always. This is no different. I am not going anywhere. Okay? I'm here. Forever." Owen exclaims. Teddy sniffles with a soft nod as his rough thumbs brush over her cheeks. Gently, she leans into his touch, staring deep into his eyes when suddenly something unexpected happens, at least, somewhat unexpected.
In a second, a mere heartbeat away, Teddy's lips collide with Owen's as she pushes him back against the wall, her arms wrapping around his neck. Before thinking, the Army man's arms wrap around her waist, pulling into him as the kiss deepens, all responsibility and consequences lost to the wind. For a minute, it is only lips on lips, skin upon skin, heart beats racing together. Softly, and reluctantly, Teddy pulls away, her eyes fixated solely upon Owen's as a baby's breath is whispered between them and then….
"What the hell just happened?"