.....wow today was.... ummm....
well, this is the most stressed i've been in... well, a LONG time. when i say a LONG time, i mean... as far back as i can remember... i don't remember being this stressed for my AP exams in high school, or the SAT... so i think you catch my drift about the magnitude of my stressedness.
today i was upset... really upset... from multiple areas. i left my room in a huff... i don't say rage b/c i wasn't all that angry. but the stress really got to me and i didn't want to feel like i was putting anyone out by requesting complete silence. i hate making people adjust for me, somehow i feel like a complete bitch when i do that. and i think i may come across that way too. but i'm sure my attitude when i left was perceived as well passed complete bitch... and on to something i'm not sure the word for has been invented yet. but i just want everyone to know that my emotions at the moment were not all directed toward them... i was mainly angry at myself, my school work, and my stupid "that-time-of-the-month" hormones are surely coming into play. i'm usually a very rational yet overly sensitive person. so, when i get stressed (which, as i've said, doesn't happen often) i'm totally irrational and extra-overly sensitive... and go ahead and jump those both up about 20 billion times to account for my hormones. i'm a nut-bag right now.
luckily my leaving the room proved to be very very helpful. i finished my mid-term for philosophy (the HUGEST assignment i've ever had to do in less than a week), read 3 more days of notes for poli, and feel a lot more relaxed. but the stress isn't over yet. i still have another mid-term, a paper, a research study, a play, 190 pages left in a book by wednesday, critique someone else's mid-term in philosophy, and re-write my mid-term in philosophy. one may think i've procrastinated... but no, not really. the only thing that wasn't assigned within the last week was the reading assignment (190 pages) which just so happens to be the most boring book that ever graced my fingertips.
tonight was special for another reason too. lets just say there's one person tonight who diagnosed a problem i've been dealing with for a long time... and i think that it's really going to help me and that person have a better relationship. ha, take a wild guess who that was. ;)(no, the problem is not something physical).
today i was upset... really upset... from multiple areas. i left my room in a huff... i don't say rage b/c i wasn't all that angry. but the stress really got to me and i didn't want to feel like i was putting anyone out by requesting complete silence. i hate making people adjust for me, somehow i feel like a complete bitch when i do that. and i think i may come across that way too. but i'm sure my attitude when i left was perceived as well passed complete bitch... and on to something i'm not sure the word for has been invented yet. but i just want everyone to know that my emotions at the moment were not all directed toward them... i was mainly angry at myself, my school work, and my stupid "that-time-of-the-month" hormones are surely coming into play. i'm usually a very rational yet overly sensitive person. so, when i get stressed (which, as i've said, doesn't happen often) i'm totally irrational and extra-overly sensitive... and go ahead and jump those both up about 20 billion times to account for my hormones. i'm a nut-bag right now.
luckily my leaving the room proved to be very very helpful. i finished my mid-term for philosophy (the HUGEST assignment i've ever had to do in less than a week), read 3 more days of notes for poli, and feel a lot more relaxed. but the stress isn't over yet. i still have another mid-term, a paper, a research study, a play, 190 pages left in a book by wednesday, critique someone else's mid-term in philosophy, and re-write my mid-term in philosophy. one may think i've procrastinated... but no, not really. the only thing that wasn't assigned within the last week was the reading assignment (190 pages) which just so happens to be the most boring book that ever graced my fingertips.
tonight was special for another reason too. lets just say there's one person tonight who diagnosed a problem i've been dealing with for a long time... and i think that it's really going to help me and that person have a better relationship. ha, take a wild guess who that was. ;)(no, the problem is not something physical).