(no subject)
No one on my friends list has written on here in 3 days. That seems like eternity. I used to write every day. Twice. Three times. I used to read and comment on so many.
I suppose this is what the passage of time is. I used to think things would always stay the same--but I know better now. The idea of losing this journal used to scare me, and now it kind of feels like I've already lost it. the connections, the words, the drive to write.
I write now. I write sermons and church blog posts and prayers and emails. I write liturgy and readings and cantata meditations. I write newsletter articles and webcontent. I write a lot.
Yet, its not the same. Not the artistry and magic that I used to let come out of my fingers. Not the release that used to come from my pen onto the journal pages. I miss it. I feel like every entry is like that.
I'm getting to do some more creative things. I'm getting to create and design worship services and write beautiful poetry and piece together interesting sermons.
So, I'm not complaining. But livejournal always came with a certain freedom. A certain authenticity. A certain transparency. Maybe that's what I'm missing. I have a veil of perfection over my face. Over my words. Over my life. Maybe the real me just wants to get out and free. To say that I hate it. Or I love it. Or sometimes it just sucks. Or I'm tired. Or, you make me happy. Or he makes me happy. Or whatever I want.
I miss you livejournal. But I am excited for what is new. What is coming. I adore twitter. I love my life. But sometimes, I still miss you.
Yeah.
Emily
I suppose this is what the passage of time is. I used to think things would always stay the same--but I know better now. The idea of losing this journal used to scare me, and now it kind of feels like I've already lost it. the connections, the words, the drive to write.
I write now. I write sermons and church blog posts and prayers and emails. I write liturgy and readings and cantata meditations. I write newsletter articles and webcontent. I write a lot.
Yet, its not the same. Not the artistry and magic that I used to let come out of my fingers. Not the release that used to come from my pen onto the journal pages. I miss it. I feel like every entry is like that.
I'm getting to do some more creative things. I'm getting to create and design worship services and write beautiful poetry and piece together interesting sermons.
So, I'm not complaining. But livejournal always came with a certain freedom. A certain authenticity. A certain transparency. Maybe that's what I'm missing. I have a veil of perfection over my face. Over my words. Over my life. Maybe the real me just wants to get out and free. To say that I hate it. Or I love it. Or sometimes it just sucks. Or I'm tired. Or, you make me happy. Or he makes me happy. Or whatever I want.
I miss you livejournal. But I am excited for what is new. What is coming. I adore twitter. I love my life. But sometimes, I still miss you.
Yeah.
Emily