Sleeping Beauty
well as you should know by now: prepare yourself for more mindless dribble by rachel :)
things are good for once. in a very scary, intimidating kind of way. my father and i are getting along well. i miss my sister and mum who are in england right now. but i home alone listening to A Perfect Circle feeling quite content. Not worrying too much about anything really.
Today Tiffany and I woke up at 9:30 in her comfortable bed to go back to my house and fed the horses and dogs. We showered and went to Wal-Mart and spent forever in Lowes trying to get keys cut. But the guy couldn't get my car key correct. Tiffany was so cute too because she was so aggravated with the fact that the guy seemed creepy and was blatantly hitting on me. I didn't even notice until she said something. I know jealously isn't a good thing, but it was nice to know that she felt slightly protective. She didn't act bad or get upset....she just noticed for once. Because so many times i feel so invisible to her. I know she doesn't intend that, but it happens with her tactless remarks.
But we wandered around Lowes looking and getting excited over lamps and door knobs. We argued over paint. And drooled over a bath tub. People were easy to talk to and laughter was there.
Then we get home and go for a walk in the woods. It was so breathtaking. We were running from this red truck as we were trespassing on private property and then we got to the pond to sit by its edge. We sat peacefully for a minute with my dog playing in the water and checking out the parameters. Then all the geese eyed us and came flying over skidding so gracefully into the water. The swans swam much more sedately over, with their regal heads eyeing us as simple peasants. We walked back holding hands fighting off the thorns and brush. Finally we made it back covered in mud and bug bites. It was total bliss to be with her in those moments.
So far since being back i have lost 5 lbs. Just been working out and running.....and basically being on the go. I am happy about this of course. I want to lose 10 more ideally...but ya know it won't happen. So i will just keep doing my endless random running.
And to be truthful, i miss mary baldwin in a way. It seems so distant, a entire universe away. Now I am the other version of rachel. I almost wonder what it would be like to see some people out of school....out in the real world. I admired so many people there. All so intelligent and dilligant. I admired the way Amy writes her soul out expressing details in ways i could only wish to imulate. I admire girls like Laurie with their confidence and open personality and dedication. I admire girls like Georgia who have the world before them, their amazing minds constantly churning capable of so much. I love girls like Emily and Maya who just floor me with their beauty inside and out. How can i forget the beautiful brown eyes that cried the day i left? How can i wish that she could be happy....
things are good for once. in a very scary, intimidating kind of way. my father and i are getting along well. i miss my sister and mum who are in england right now. but i home alone listening to A Perfect Circle feeling quite content. Not worrying too much about anything really.
Today Tiffany and I woke up at 9:30 in her comfortable bed to go back to my house and fed the horses and dogs. We showered and went to Wal-Mart and spent forever in Lowes trying to get keys cut. But the guy couldn't get my car key correct. Tiffany was so cute too because she was so aggravated with the fact that the guy seemed creepy and was blatantly hitting on me. I didn't even notice until she said something. I know jealously isn't a good thing, but it was nice to know that she felt slightly protective. She didn't act bad or get upset....she just noticed for once. Because so many times i feel so invisible to her. I know she doesn't intend that, but it happens with her tactless remarks.
But we wandered around Lowes looking and getting excited over lamps and door knobs. We argued over paint. And drooled over a bath tub. People were easy to talk to and laughter was there.
Then we get home and go for a walk in the woods. It was so breathtaking. We were running from this red truck as we were trespassing on private property and then we got to the pond to sit by its edge. We sat peacefully for a minute with my dog playing in the water and checking out the parameters. Then all the geese eyed us and came flying over skidding so gracefully into the water. The swans swam much more sedately over, with their regal heads eyeing us as simple peasants. We walked back holding hands fighting off the thorns and brush. Finally we made it back covered in mud and bug bites. It was total bliss to be with her in those moments.
So far since being back i have lost 5 lbs. Just been working out and running.....and basically being on the go. I am happy about this of course. I want to lose 10 more ideally...but ya know it won't happen. So i will just keep doing my endless random running.
And to be truthful, i miss mary baldwin in a way. It seems so distant, a entire universe away. Now I am the other version of rachel. I almost wonder what it would be like to see some people out of school....out in the real world. I admired so many people there. All so intelligent and dilligant. I admired the way Amy writes her soul out expressing details in ways i could only wish to imulate. I admire girls like Laurie with their confidence and open personality and dedication. I admire girls like Georgia who have the world before them, their amazing minds constantly churning capable of so much. I love girls like Emily and Maya who just floor me with their beauty inside and out. How can i forget the beautiful brown eyes that cried the day i left? How can i wish that she could be happy....