When You Find The Girl Of Your Dreams In The Arms Of Some Scotsman From Hull*
Narrator: What did he like?
Iris Mountbatten: The trousers.
Narrator: Well, what about the trousers.
Iris Mountbatten: Well, they were very, um, tight.
Narrator: Tight?
Iris Mountbatten: Yes, you could see quite clearly...
Narrator: Oh I see...
Iris Mountbatten: Everything. Outlines. Clear as day.
Narrator: Yes, yes. Thank you.
Narrator: For four hungry, working class lads there are worse places than prison and Der Rat Keller, Hamburg is one of these. This is where they found themselves - far from home and far from talented.
Archie Macaw: They had something.
Narrator: What was it?
Archie Macaw: I think it was the trousers.
Narrator: Dick Jaws, an unemployed music publisher of no fixed ability signed them up for the rest of their lives.
Dick Jaws: Lucky really.
Interviewer: What's your ambition?
Barry Wom: I'd like to be a hairdresser. Or two. I'd like to be two hairdressers.
Ron Nasty: I'd like to own a squadron of tanks.
Dirk McQuickly: What Ron and I'll do is probably to write some songs, you know, and sell them to people. We tried to write some for The Rolling Stones and they're probably gonna buy them.
Journalist: It must have been a great honour meeting the Queen.
Ron Nasty: Yeah, it must have been.
Journalist: What did she ask you?
Barry Wom: She asked us who we were.
Journalist: What did you say?
Dirk McQuickly: I said I was him.
Ron Nasty: I felt more like him than me.
Journalist: Do you feel better after seeing the Queen?
Ron Nasty: No, you feel better after seeing a doctor.
Dirk McQuickly: Not my doctor you don't.
Ron Nasty: Not your doctor, no.
Journalist: What are you gonna do now?
Dirk McQuickly: Back to your place.
Ruttling Orange Peel: Yes Sir, I originated The Rutles, they got it all from me. Every single bit of it.
Narrator: Well, how do you mean?
Ruttling Orange Peel: Well Sir, they come here and they took everything I ever written. Those four guys from Liverpool came here.
Mrs Ruttling Orange Peel: He's lying!
Ruttling Orange Peel: I ain't lying!
Mrs Ruttling Orange Peel: He's always lying!
Ruttling Orange Peel: I ain't lying!
Mrs Ruttling Orange Peel: Everytime there's a documentary on white music around here he claims he started it all.
Ruttling Orange Peel: I did, I did, I did!
Mrs Ruttling Orange Peel: Last week he claimed he started Everly Brothers, Frank Sinatra and Lawrence Welk. He's always lying!
Narrator: Che Stadium. Named after the Cuban Guerilla leader - Che Stadium.
Narrator: In 1966 The Rutles faced the biggest threat to their careers. Nasty, in a widely quoted interview apparently had claimed that The Rutles were bigger than God and had gone on to say that God had never had a hit record. The story spread like wild fire in America. Many fans burnt their Rutles albums. Many more burnt their fingers attempting to burn their albums. Rutles album sales sky rocketed - people were buying them just to burn them. But infact it was all a ghastly mistake. Nasty, talking to a slightly deaf journalist, had claimed only that The Rutles were bigger than Rod. Rod Stewart would not be big for another eight years.
Dirk McQuickly: It's not up to me. If you come to me and ask me I'm gonna tell you the truth. Because it is the truth, I have had tea. Lots of tea. Indian tea. And biscuits.
Narrator: It was a bombshell for The Rutles, They were shocked. And stunned.
Dirk McQuickly: Well, we're shocked.
Ron Nasty: Yeah, shocked.
Barry Wom: Shocked.
Dirk McQuickly: And stunned.
Ron Nasty: Yeah, stunned.
Barry Wom: Very stunned.
Narrator: Decline had a reputation as a hard man. His only weak spot was dishonesty. Anyone was free to inspect his books but no-one could find his accounts. He struck terror into the hearts of his sub-ordinates. People would commit suicide rather than meet him. In business his left hand never knew who his right hand was doing. Nasty adored him - he was a man after his own wallet.
Narrator: In the midst of all this public bickering, "Let it Rot" was released as a film, an album, and a lawsuit. In 1970, Dirk sued Stig, Nasty, and Barry; Barry sued Dirk, Nasty, and Stig; Nasty sued Barry, Dirk, and Stig; and Stig sued himself accidentally. It was the beginning of a golden era for lawyers, but for the Rutles, live on a London rooftop, it was the beginning of the end.
Your mother should know that this is probably my favourite scene in the film, bar none.
Watching Neil and Eric Idle (centre left and centre right) mug for the cam here has me cracking up each and every time.
Rutle Trivia
The Rutles was first shown as a sketch on UK TV show Rutland Weekend Television written by Eric Idle
When Eric Idle hosted Saturday Night Live the original TV sketch was re-shown leading to the film being made
The full title is actually The Rutles: All You Need Is Cash
Stig O'Hara's character stayed true to his image as The Quiet One by not speaking one line throughout the film
Ollie Halsall provided the singing voice for Eric Idle's character as well as playing Leppo, the 5th Rutle
Neil Innes also appeared in The Beatles movie Magical Mystery Tour
In the original TV version Dan Aykroyd's character who turned down The Rutles actually shot himself as opposed to being asked "What's it like to be such an asshole?"
The Rutles minus Eric Idle re-formed in 1996 to record Archaeology in response to The Beatles Anthology series
A sequel was made in 2002 titled The Rutles: Can't Buy Me Lunch but is yet to be made available outside of the USA
The studly and well-coiffed young Neil Innes, one of my Imaginary Boyfriends. *pine, sigh* (ROFFLE!)
Who the Heck Is Neil Innes?
Not content with providing a pitch-perfect impression of John Lennon as Ron Nasty, Innes also wrote the music and lyrics to all The Rutles songs.
Neil Innes was also a regular on the Monty Python TV series and movies. For these he was also the guy responsible for a whole host of their songs.
In Monty Python And The Holy Grail, Innes played, among other roles, that of the Minstrel taunting Eric Idle's character Brave Sir Robin for running away - "When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled. Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about, and valiantly, he chickened out. Bravely taking to his feet, he beat a very brave retreat. A brave retreat by brave Sir Robin"
In more recent years and despite nearly being sued himself by The Beatles during the making of The Rutles, Innes successfully sued Oasis for plagiarism. Their hit Whatever was deemed to be too similar to Neil Innes' song How Sweet To Be An Idiot.
I've had Bonzo (Doo Dah) Dog Band and Rutles albums for decades and enjoyed them, and played them on my radio show, and of course The Beatles were a godly influence on my young self. Not that anyone else had heard of them, of course.
But, ah, bad timing, Not that Neil Innes isn't still cute as the proverbial button, but he could be my granddad. Woe!
Previous depressions about having a crush denied include finding out Jim Morrison got fat, wrote bad poetry and died, and that Nick Drake didn't get fat, wrote good poetry, but still died.
Quel dommage!
Also, I learned that writing poetry, good or bad, may be detrimental to your health.
* No mention of Hull is complete without a shout out to the dearly departed Mick Ronson.
Miss ya, Ronno!
** Some highlights from aforementioned paltry DVD collection (note that I received a DVD/VCR for Christmas this past year, per request; prior to that, I collected VHS tapes, especially those I found in buck bins!):
After Hours
The Alfred Hitchcock Collection
What The Bleep?!: Down The Rabbit Hole
Better Off Dead
The Young Ones collection
Absolutely Fabulous collection
The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy BBC series
The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy film
Blur: starshaped
Fun With The Fab Four ("Oh, Thisbe!")
Made In Sheffield.
Live Forever: The Rise & Fall of Britpop
Suede: Lost In TV
Blur: The Best Of
Shawn Of The Dead
V For Vendetta
Monty Python and the Holy Grail special edition
Pulp Fiction collector's edition
The Aristocrats
Thank You for Smoking
FILTER: See What You're Missing
The Kerry Kit
Art School Confidential
Three reiki DVDs
Office Space with added FLAIR!
It is rather sad how much I relate to this film. I've had this job (see above) several times, AND I've worked for Initech-like corporations. One of my old bosses WAS Bill Lumbergh.
Most of these were freebies, bargain binners, or gifts. My VHS collection is probably more reflective of my personality, but this isn't a bad start.
I see one big problem already! Needs MOAR Jackie Chan. Also, i had a Pulp video collection, but, alas, it was for Region 2. Back it went. Anyone know where I can get a Region 1 collection of Pulp videos? I need MOAR Jarvis Cocker, too!
My VHS tape list and my Amazon Wish List is actually more revelatory, but to share my Wish List would risk putting me on a par with cam girls flashing their bewbeez for prezzies, and I was born with my sense of pride intact, so that's not going to happen.
What DO (or at one point DID) I like?
24 Hour Party People, Π, Adaptation, After Hours, All of Me, Almost Famous, American Beauty, Angels in America, As Good As It Gets, Austin Powers, Back To The Future, Basquiat, Beetlejuice, Being John Malkovich, Benny and Joon, Better Off Dead..., The Big Lebowski, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, Blade Runner, The Blues Brothers, Blue Velvet, Breakfast at Tiffany's, The Breakfast Club, Bridget Jones' Diary, Cape Fear, Catch Me If You Can, Chasing Amy, A Christmas Story, Citizen Kane, Clerks, A Clockwork Orange, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, The Crow, The Crying Game, The Cube, Desperately Seeking Susan, Dogma, Dogs In Space, The Doors, Dr Strangelove, Edward Scissorhands, Ed Wood, Election, Fahrenheit 9/11, Fargo, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, The Filth and the Fury, A Fish Called Wanda, Four Rooms, The Fugitive, Ghostbusters, Ghost World, Go, Good Will Hunting, Grosse Point Blank, Hair, Hairspray, Happiness, A Hard Day's Night, Harry Potter (any), Having A Wild Weekend, Heathers, Heavenly Creatures, Hedwig and the Angry Inch, Help!, High Fidelity, Hollywood Shuffle, How to Get Ahead in Advertising, The Hunger, Hunting Venus, Jackie Brown, Jawbreaker, The Jerk, L.A. Story, Light of Day, Little Shop of Horrors, Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, The Lonely Guy, The Matrix, Memento, Men in Black, Mommie Dearest, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, My Friend Totoro, Mystic Pizza, Natural Born Killers, Nightmare Before Christmas, 9 to 5, Office Space, Pecker, Pee Wee's Big Adventure, The Pianist, Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl, Philadelphia, The Princess Bride, Pulp Fiction, Quadrophenia, Raising Arizona, Repo Man, Reservoir Dogs, Rock and Rule, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Rushmore, Say Anything, Schindler's List, Se7en, The Shawshank Redemption, The Shining, Sid and Nancy, The Silence of the Lambs, Sixteen Candles, Sixth Sense (even though I guessed the "surprise" right away), Sleepy Hollow, Snatch, Sugartown, Swingers, This Is Spinal Tap, Trading Places, Trainspotting, Tommy, Top Secret, Unprecedented, URGH! A Music War, Valley Girl, Velvet Goldmine, The Virgin Suicides, War Games, Wayne's World, Weird Science, What's Eating Gilbert Grape?, When Harry Met Sally, Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, Wilde, Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory, Wings of Desire, Withnail and I, The Women, The Wrong Trousers, Xanadu, Yellow Submarine, Young Frankenstein, oldies like the Thin Man movies, etc., etc.
Some simple guidelines:
If it is a quirky film, I probably like it.
If it is a weird film, I probably like it.
If it is a depressing film with flawed and tragic characters struggling for redemption against bad odds, I probably like it.
If it is stylish, I probably like it.
If it is funny but has a minimum of gross-out scatalogical humour, I probably like it.
If everyone in the film is wearing bad 80's clothing, I probably like it.
If everyone has a British accent--even if they are awful, fake, ultraplummy British accents--I probably dig it the most, baby.
If it is a "rock and roll movie", I probably like it. Even if it sucks, like "Light of Day".
If Pixar studios made it, I hate myself for being a dorky adult liking a kid's movie...but I still like it.
If Disney studios made it, and Randy Newman wrote the theme song, I probably don't like it much.
If it's a brainless chick movie (a.k.a. "romoporn"), I probably won't like it if it takes itself too seriously. Heck, I probably just won't like it at all.
If it has Jackie Chan in it, I don't care how bad the plot is, I like it. Jackie Chan is The Nazz. Ash even wrote a song about the guy. 'Nuff said.
I also like Tommy Lee Jones and Harry Dean Stanton. Maybe it's the three names.
If it is a big budget summer blockbuster, I probably don't have much of an opinion about it or I hate it. Titanic. Yawn. Whatever.
If it has Tom Cruise in it, I probably hate it. Then again, I haven't seen Magnolia yet.
I occasionally get in the mood for a overdose of James Bond flicks, but not the ones that are rubbish. I'm one of those people who actually enjoy student art films, documentaries (especially political ones), "oldies" and subtitled foreign films.
I also am one of those people who always have hard luck and manage to sit near the herd of loud-chatting, popcorn-throwing, plot-spoiling, soda-flinging people with a colicky baby, a toddler asking "Why?" upteen times, and / or a ringing mobile phone (which these boorish clods will inevitably answer, the better to carry on a loud conversation no one wants to hear them having) whenever I do go see a movie. As a result, I am hard-pressed to find anything I want to pay $10+ to go see in a theatre.
Movies I hated (for various reasons): Disney's The Black Hole, C.H.O.M.P.S., Raise the Titanic!, Reds.
Movies that are so bad they are good: Plan 9 from Outer Space, Barbarella, The Forbidden Zone
Movies I never have seen in their entirety that I am sick of anyway: Purple Rain, Dirty Dancing, Bridges of Madison County.
You get the idea.
In other news, my Ex-Boyfriend The Neo-Victorian Luddite JetSetVagabond has finally decided, after four years of gentle prodding from Yours Truly, to sign up for MySpace. Silly bugger.
Iris Mountbatten: The trousers.
Narrator: Well, what about the trousers.
Iris Mountbatten: Well, they were very, um, tight.
Narrator: Tight?
Iris Mountbatten: Yes, you could see quite clearly...
Narrator: Oh I see...
Iris Mountbatten: Everything. Outlines. Clear as day.
Narrator: Yes, yes. Thank you.
Narrator: For four hungry, working class lads there are worse places than prison and Der Rat Keller, Hamburg is one of these. This is where they found themselves - far from home and far from talented.
Archie Macaw: They had something.
Narrator: What was it?
Archie Macaw: I think it was the trousers.
Narrator: Dick Jaws, an unemployed music publisher of no fixed ability signed them up for the rest of their lives.
Dick Jaws: Lucky really.
Interviewer: What's your ambition?
Barry Wom: I'd like to be a hairdresser. Or two. I'd like to be two hairdressers.
Ron Nasty: I'd like to own a squadron of tanks.
Dirk McQuickly: What Ron and I'll do is probably to write some songs, you know, and sell them to people. We tried to write some for The Rolling Stones and they're probably gonna buy them.
Journalist: It must have been a great honour meeting the Queen.
Ron Nasty: Yeah, it must have been.
Journalist: What did she ask you?
Barry Wom: She asked us who we were.
Journalist: What did you say?
Dirk McQuickly: I said I was him.
Ron Nasty: I felt more like him than me.
Journalist: Do you feel better after seeing the Queen?
Ron Nasty: No, you feel better after seeing a doctor.
Dirk McQuickly: Not my doctor you don't.
Ron Nasty: Not your doctor, no.
Journalist: What are you gonna do now?
Dirk McQuickly: Back to your place.
Ruttling Orange Peel: Yes Sir, I originated The Rutles, they got it all from me. Every single bit of it.
Narrator: Well, how do you mean?
Ruttling Orange Peel: Well Sir, they come here and they took everything I ever written. Those four guys from Liverpool came here.
Mrs Ruttling Orange Peel: He's lying!
Ruttling Orange Peel: I ain't lying!
Mrs Ruttling Orange Peel: He's always lying!
Ruttling Orange Peel: I ain't lying!
Mrs Ruttling Orange Peel: Everytime there's a documentary on white music around here he claims he started it all.
Ruttling Orange Peel: I did, I did, I did!
Mrs Ruttling Orange Peel: Last week he claimed he started Everly Brothers, Frank Sinatra and Lawrence Welk. He's always lying!
Narrator: Che Stadium. Named after the Cuban Guerilla leader - Che Stadium.
Narrator: In 1966 The Rutles faced the biggest threat to their careers. Nasty, in a widely quoted interview apparently had claimed that The Rutles were bigger than God and had gone on to say that God had never had a hit record. The story spread like wild fire in America. Many fans burnt their Rutles albums. Many more burnt their fingers attempting to burn their albums. Rutles album sales sky rocketed - people were buying them just to burn them. But infact it was all a ghastly mistake. Nasty, talking to a slightly deaf journalist, had claimed only that The Rutles were bigger than Rod. Rod Stewart would not be big for another eight years.
Dirk McQuickly: It's not up to me. If you come to me and ask me I'm gonna tell you the truth. Because it is the truth, I have had tea. Lots of tea. Indian tea. And biscuits.
Narrator: It was a bombshell for The Rutles, They were shocked. And stunned.
Dirk McQuickly: Well, we're shocked.
Ron Nasty: Yeah, shocked.
Barry Wom: Shocked.
Dirk McQuickly: And stunned.
Ron Nasty: Yeah, stunned.
Barry Wom: Very stunned.
Narrator: Decline had a reputation as a hard man. His only weak spot was dishonesty. Anyone was free to inspect his books but no-one could find his accounts. He struck terror into the hearts of his sub-ordinates. People would commit suicide rather than meet him. In business his left hand never knew who his right hand was doing. Nasty adored him - he was a man after his own wallet.
Narrator: In the midst of all this public bickering, "Let it Rot" was released as a film, an album, and a lawsuit. In 1970, Dirk sued Stig, Nasty, and Barry; Barry sued Dirk, Nasty, and Stig; Nasty sued Barry, Dirk, and Stig; and Stig sued himself accidentally. It was the beginning of a golden era for lawyers, but for the Rutles, live on a London rooftop, it was the beginning of the end.
Your mother should know that this is probably my favourite scene in the film, bar none.
Watching Neil and Eric Idle (centre left and centre right) mug for the cam here has me cracking up each and every time.
Rutle Trivia
The Rutles was first shown as a sketch on UK TV show Rutland Weekend Television written by Eric Idle
When Eric Idle hosted Saturday Night Live the original TV sketch was re-shown leading to the film being made
The full title is actually The Rutles: All You Need Is Cash
Stig O'Hara's character stayed true to his image as The Quiet One by not speaking one line throughout the film
Ollie Halsall provided the singing voice for Eric Idle's character as well as playing Leppo, the 5th Rutle
Neil Innes also appeared in The Beatles movie Magical Mystery Tour
In the original TV version Dan Aykroyd's character who turned down The Rutles actually shot himself as opposed to being asked "What's it like to be such an asshole?"
The Rutles minus Eric Idle re-formed in 1996 to record Archaeology in response to The Beatles Anthology series
A sequel was made in 2002 titled The Rutles: Can't Buy Me Lunch but is yet to be made available outside of the USA
The studly and well-coiffed young Neil Innes, one of my Imaginary Boyfriends. *pine, sigh* (ROFFLE!)
Who the Heck Is Neil Innes?
Not content with providing a pitch-perfect impression of John Lennon as Ron Nasty, Innes also wrote the music and lyrics to all The Rutles songs.
Neil Innes was also a regular on the Monty Python TV series and movies. For these he was also the guy responsible for a whole host of their songs.
In Monty Python And The Holy Grail, Innes played, among other roles, that of the Minstrel taunting Eric Idle's character Brave Sir Robin for running away - "When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled. Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about, and valiantly, he chickened out. Bravely taking to his feet, he beat a very brave retreat. A brave retreat by brave Sir Robin"
In more recent years and despite nearly being sued himself by The Beatles during the making of The Rutles, Innes successfully sued Oasis for plagiarism. Their hit Whatever was deemed to be too similar to Neil Innes' song How Sweet To Be An Idiot.
I've had Bonzo (Doo Dah) Dog Band and Rutles albums for decades and enjoyed them, and played them on my radio show, and of course The Beatles were a godly influence on my young self. Not that anyone else had heard of them, of course.
But, ah, bad timing, Not that Neil Innes isn't still cute as the proverbial button, but he could be my granddad. Woe!
Previous depressions about having a crush denied include finding out Jim Morrison got fat, wrote bad poetry and died, and that Nick Drake didn't get fat, wrote good poetry, but still died.
Quel dommage!
Also, I learned that writing poetry, good or bad, may be detrimental to your health.
* No mention of Hull is complete without a shout out to the dearly departed Mick Ronson.
Miss ya, Ronno!
** Some highlights from aforementioned paltry DVD collection (note that I received a DVD/VCR for Christmas this past year, per request; prior to that, I collected VHS tapes, especially those I found in buck bins!):
After Hours
The Alfred Hitchcock Collection
What The Bleep?!: Down The Rabbit Hole
Better Off Dead
The Young Ones collection
Absolutely Fabulous collection
The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy BBC series
The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy film
Blur: starshaped
Fun With The Fab Four ("Oh, Thisbe!")
Made In Sheffield.
Live Forever: The Rise & Fall of Britpop
Suede: Lost In TV
Blur: The Best Of
Shawn Of The Dead
V For Vendetta
Monty Python and the Holy Grail special edition
Pulp Fiction collector's edition
The Aristocrats
Thank You for Smoking
FILTER: See What You're Missing
The Kerry Kit
Art School Confidential
Three reiki DVDs
Office Space with added FLAIR!
It is rather sad how much I relate to this film. I've had this job (see above) several times, AND I've worked for Initech-like corporations. One of my old bosses WAS Bill Lumbergh.
Most of these were freebies, bargain binners, or gifts. My VHS collection is probably more reflective of my personality, but this isn't a bad start.
I see one big problem already! Needs MOAR Jackie Chan. Also, i had a Pulp video collection, but, alas, it was for Region 2. Back it went. Anyone know where I can get a Region 1 collection of Pulp videos? I need MOAR Jarvis Cocker, too!
My VHS tape list and my Amazon Wish List is actually more revelatory, but to share my Wish List would risk putting me on a par with cam girls flashing their bewbeez for prezzies, and I was born with my sense of pride intact, so that's not going to happen.
What DO (or at one point DID) I like?
24 Hour Party People, Π, Adaptation, After Hours, All of Me, Almost Famous, American Beauty, Angels in America, As Good As It Gets, Austin Powers, Back To The Future, Basquiat, Beetlejuice, Being John Malkovich, Benny and Joon, Better Off Dead..., The Big Lebowski, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, Blade Runner, The Blues Brothers, Blue Velvet, Breakfast at Tiffany's, The Breakfast Club, Bridget Jones' Diary, Cape Fear, Catch Me If You Can, Chasing Amy, A Christmas Story, Citizen Kane, Clerks, A Clockwork Orange, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, The Crow, The Crying Game, The Cube, Desperately Seeking Susan, Dogma, Dogs In Space, The Doors, Dr Strangelove, Edward Scissorhands, Ed Wood, Election, Fahrenheit 9/11, Fargo, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, The Filth and the Fury, A Fish Called Wanda, Four Rooms, The Fugitive, Ghostbusters, Ghost World, Go, Good Will Hunting, Grosse Point Blank, Hair, Hairspray, Happiness, A Hard Day's Night, Harry Potter (any), Having A Wild Weekend, Heathers, Heavenly Creatures, Hedwig and the Angry Inch, Help!, High Fidelity, Hollywood Shuffle, How to Get Ahead in Advertising, The Hunger, Hunting Venus, Jackie Brown, Jawbreaker, The Jerk, L.A. Story, Light of Day, Little Shop of Horrors, Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, The Lonely Guy, The Matrix, Memento, Men in Black, Mommie Dearest, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, My Friend Totoro, Mystic Pizza, Natural Born Killers, Nightmare Before Christmas, 9 to 5, Office Space, Pecker, Pee Wee's Big Adventure, The Pianist, Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl, Philadelphia, The Princess Bride, Pulp Fiction, Quadrophenia, Raising Arizona, Repo Man, Reservoir Dogs, Rock and Rule, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Rushmore, Say Anything, Schindler's List, Se7en, The Shawshank Redemption, The Shining, Sid and Nancy, The Silence of the Lambs, Sixteen Candles, Sixth Sense (even though I guessed the "surprise" right away), Sleepy Hollow, Snatch, Sugartown, Swingers, This Is Spinal Tap, Trading Places, Trainspotting, Tommy, Top Secret, Unprecedented, URGH! A Music War, Valley Girl, Velvet Goldmine, The Virgin Suicides, War Games, Wayne's World, Weird Science, What's Eating Gilbert Grape?, When Harry Met Sally, Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, Wilde, Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory, Wings of Desire, Withnail and I, The Women, The Wrong Trousers, Xanadu, Yellow Submarine, Young Frankenstein, oldies like the Thin Man movies, etc., etc.
Some simple guidelines:
If it is a quirky film, I probably like it.
If it is a weird film, I probably like it.
If it is a depressing film with flawed and tragic characters struggling for redemption against bad odds, I probably like it.
If it is stylish, I probably like it.
If it is funny but has a minimum of gross-out scatalogical humour, I probably like it.
If everyone in the film is wearing bad 80's clothing, I probably like it.
If everyone has a British accent--even if they are awful, fake, ultraplummy British accents--I probably dig it the most, baby.
If it is a "rock and roll movie", I probably like it. Even if it sucks, like "Light of Day".
If Pixar studios made it, I hate myself for being a dorky adult liking a kid's movie...but I still like it.
If Disney studios made it, and Randy Newman wrote the theme song, I probably don't like it much.
If it's a brainless chick movie (a.k.a. "romoporn"), I probably won't like it if it takes itself too seriously. Heck, I probably just won't like it at all.
If it has Jackie Chan in it, I don't care how bad the plot is, I like it. Jackie Chan is The Nazz. Ash even wrote a song about the guy. 'Nuff said.
I also like Tommy Lee Jones and Harry Dean Stanton. Maybe it's the three names.
If it is a big budget summer blockbuster, I probably don't have much of an opinion about it or I hate it. Titanic. Yawn. Whatever.
If it has Tom Cruise in it, I probably hate it. Then again, I haven't seen Magnolia yet.
I occasionally get in the mood for a overdose of James Bond flicks, but not the ones that are rubbish. I'm one of those people who actually enjoy student art films, documentaries (especially political ones), "oldies" and subtitled foreign films.
I also am one of those people who always have hard luck and manage to sit near the herd of loud-chatting, popcorn-throwing, plot-spoiling, soda-flinging people with a colicky baby, a toddler asking "Why?" upteen times, and / or a ringing mobile phone (which these boorish clods will inevitably answer, the better to carry on a loud conversation no one wants to hear them having) whenever I do go see a movie. As a result, I am hard-pressed to find anything I want to pay $10+ to go see in a theatre.
Movies I hated (for various reasons): Disney's The Black Hole, C.H.O.M.P.S., Raise the Titanic!, Reds.
Movies that are so bad they are good: Plan 9 from Outer Space, Barbarella, The Forbidden Zone
Movies I never have seen in their entirety that I am sick of anyway: Purple Rain, Dirty Dancing, Bridges of Madison County.
You get the idea.
In other news, my Ex-Boyfriend The Neo-Victorian Luddite JetSetVagabond has finally decided, after four years of gentle prodding from Yours Truly, to sign up for MySpace. Silly bugger.