Sarcasm is prevalent.
Well duh.
I knew he was fucking that bitch- I was informed of that a long ass time ago. Part of me giggles that they thought cats were that stupid. The other part of me is in a much darker place.
But yeah. The update on me is I smoke weed everyday. I've been hearing more about how weed is a gateway drug. I don't really agree. Before I smoked I took many different things- mostly prescriptions. I abused the shit out of them. Then I stepped back and then started smoking. And thats all I've been cool with.
But. I've always had the mentality i'd try different things. I sort of want to try acid.
I was hanging with my dealer and he was telling me about the previous nightly activities. How he and another guy had tripped acid and went out drinking.
The idea of euphoria is nice. The idea of hallucinating so hard that I can see a good day sounds amazing.
I really don't have much to loose at this point. My grades are good- there are no known side effects.
Isaac has been so good to me. I enjoy spending time with him. We can lay around and watch videos or smoke a cig and watch the smoke. being near each other is key. And I like that. He's so cute when he sleeps- he kicks a bit and thats fine because I snore in his ear. And I sort of feel bad that he wouldn't know. I want to tell him.
I want him to know how I feel about things. How the thought of D'andre Hendrix makes me want to kill things. How i'm still not as over him as i'd like to be- i can't just kick people to the curb like that even when I do get pissed.
I'm going to hang out with my dealer more this summer.
I really wish that I could be happy. That Isaac could do the job alone. But man. I smoke enough weed everyday to be high for hours. I've drank more this weekend than I have in the past three months.
But thats a'ok right? I was the one who could never leave. I was the one who wouldn't leave D'andre first and I did. And everyone was so happy. SO FUCKING HAPPY. And shit- i was even fucking happy too. Because he deserved it.
Oh how that blew up in my face.
Oh how happy I am now.
This was such a great idea. Such a fucking awesome idea! This will go down in history as the BEST FUCKING IDEA EVER. Way to go Brit! FUCK YEAH.
I'm totally laughing right now. In fact as I type this i'm laughing so fucking hard i'm crying. I'm not sure which one im doing more of though.
I'm conflicted. I have no clue how Isaac would take my thoughts. I may talk to him tonight. Tell him how i'm feeling. I hope he would understand me. I hope he won't yell at me and kick me out. I don't know what i'd do if he did.
I can barely recover enough now to get through a day. I can't even imagine.
I knew he was fucking that bitch- I was informed of that a long ass time ago. Part of me giggles that they thought cats were that stupid. The other part of me is in a much darker place.
But yeah. The update on me is I smoke weed everyday. I've been hearing more about how weed is a gateway drug. I don't really agree. Before I smoked I took many different things- mostly prescriptions. I abused the shit out of them. Then I stepped back and then started smoking. And thats all I've been cool with.
But. I've always had the mentality i'd try different things. I sort of want to try acid.
I was hanging with my dealer and he was telling me about the previous nightly activities. How he and another guy had tripped acid and went out drinking.
The idea of euphoria is nice. The idea of hallucinating so hard that I can see a good day sounds amazing.
I really don't have much to loose at this point. My grades are good- there are no known side effects.
Isaac has been so good to me. I enjoy spending time with him. We can lay around and watch videos or smoke a cig and watch the smoke. being near each other is key. And I like that. He's so cute when he sleeps- he kicks a bit and thats fine because I snore in his ear. And I sort of feel bad that he wouldn't know. I want to tell him.
I want him to know how I feel about things. How the thought of D'andre Hendrix makes me want to kill things. How i'm still not as over him as i'd like to be- i can't just kick people to the curb like that even when I do get pissed.
I'm going to hang out with my dealer more this summer.
I really wish that I could be happy. That Isaac could do the job alone. But man. I smoke enough weed everyday to be high for hours. I've drank more this weekend than I have in the past three months.
But thats a'ok right? I was the one who could never leave. I was the one who wouldn't leave D'andre first and I did. And everyone was so happy. SO FUCKING HAPPY. And shit- i was even fucking happy too. Because he deserved it.
Oh how that blew up in my face.
Oh how happy I am now.
This was such a great idea. Such a fucking awesome idea! This will go down in history as the BEST FUCKING IDEA EVER. Way to go Brit! FUCK YEAH.
I'm totally laughing right now. In fact as I type this i'm laughing so fucking hard i'm crying. I'm not sure which one im doing more of though.
I'm conflicted. I have no clue how Isaac would take my thoughts. I may talk to him tonight. Tell him how i'm feeling. I hope he would understand me. I hope he won't yell at me and kick me out. I don't know what i'd do if he did.
I can barely recover enough now to get through a day. I can't even imagine.