Paris Outta Jail

Jun 07, 2007 16:21

Got this interesting blog posting from CNN.



Paris out of jail?!?
If you haven't growled it yet, let me do it for you. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!!!

The news that Paris Hilton was let out of jail after only three days first came in on my BlackBerry as I was heading into the office. And to my surprise, it triggered a BlackBerry-generated message on-screen that read: ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!!!

OK. Maybe not. But those words did come out of MY mouth. Loud. Instinctive. Visceral. Primal. Guttural.

Matter of fact, I am still shaking my head so hard in disbelief I have a kink in my neck that will require a massage, for which I will send the bill to Paris for collateral damage.

So why was Paris sprung from the pokey after spending just three days of her expected 23 days in the L.A. jail? The sheriff's department cited a "medical condition," didn't say what it was, but took pains to point out that she would now serve out her original 45-day sentence in her house and will wear an electronic monitoring bracelet.

Oh.

Hold on just a second. Let's take this one at a time.

Medical condition? Do they not have doctors in the jail? When other inmates get sick, are they also let go?

Did some sleuth sneak into the L.A. Sheriff's Department overnight and remove the computer chip that regulates reason? Do they not realize the outrage this will provoke, the claims of special treatment?

So Paris will be under house arrest. Her house. The mansion she lives in. Her reward for getting arrested for DUI, then violating probation by not once -- not twice -- but three times driving with a suspended license.

On "The View," Joy Behar observed "This girl can get out of more things than David Copperfield." Great analogy. Because like a master magician, it would appear that Paris has, indeed, pulled a rabbit out of her hat.

And I'll bet you that even the rabbit is pissed.

Medical condition my ass. To paraphrase Klae - her medical condition was probably her throat closing after 72 hours because it hasn't had a cock in it!

God, that bitch irks me. She's fucking UGLY, but more importantly, has done nothing whatsoever for the good of mankind. She can't even let some schmuck fuck her without having to answer her cellphone ;) Why can't we send the Paris's and the Britneys and the Lindsays to warzones to be cannon fodder? Send those bitches out hunting for IEDs to keep our troops safer. We don't need 'em.
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