Lost.
Guess what time it is, kids?
Time to read along with my reactions to the two-hour season premiere of Lost!
Okay.
I'm five minutes in.
And I'm BASICALLY all "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON."
It's good to be watching Lost again.
My main question right now is, if this is the new reality, and I AM NOT CONVINCED THAT IT IS, how much is Jack, or anyone, aware of anything? Also, what the hell kind of destiny has Desmond ON THEIR PLANE?
... I'm sorry, the island is now UNDERWATER?
Sweet mother of God, I love Juliet.
AHAHAHAHA. Love Kate nearly falling out of the tree! But, uh, does this mean she's not on the plane? And is on the island? You know, the island that's underwater?
Wow. The audio is annoying as hell. Nice touch, though?
I MISS MY JULIET IN THE CREDITS. Dammit.
Holy crap, get a load of all the guest stars. Bernard, Rose, various people, JULIET, CHARLIE, and others.
Interesting. Kate, this Kate who was in a relationship with Jack for however long she was, sees Sawyer first, but goes to check on Jack first.
Wait a minute. Jack? Bloody hell, the intro was a dream, wasn't it?
BOONE. Hah!
Holy crap, Sawyer is NOT happy. Can't say I blame him.
"I'm sorry"? That's it? Really? JULIET IS DEAD AND YOU ARE SORRY?
... wait. We're... what? The marshall? Kate in cuffs? WHAT THE FRILLY HECK IS GOING ON HERE?
Haha, they tried with Sawyer's hair. They did. Six points for effort. And ten points for not cutting off Josh Holloway's hair.
Okay, whatever is happening here, this can't be our reality. Hurley has had nothing BUT bad luck since he played the numbers.
Yeah, see? Sitting there with Sayid and Jin, Sayid bleeding to death. That's not unlucky at all. :P
JULIET?! OH MY SWEET GOD, IS THAT JULIET?!
James!! OH MY GOD, JULIET IS ALIVE.
Ewwwww. I'm with Hurley, that's totally gross. Poor Sayid. :( Not only is he in pain, but he's wracked with guilt over all the things he's done.
Oh, Hurley. I love you and your silliness.
Uh, hang on. Isn't that Jacob? Isn't Jacob dead?
Aw, Sun staring at Bernard and Joyce. :(
And Jin is back to being a dick. :(
BOONE!
So wait, did Shannon not go back with Boone?
Is Locke lying his ass off about being on a walkabout?
I'm getting very confused with seeing Plane!People and Island!People.
See? Dead Jacob. Right? So who the hell was talking to Hurley?
It always freaks me out to see Ben being scared. A lot.
Frank! And Sun!
See, Ben's scared. AND SO AM I.
OMG, Juliet! SAVE HER, PEOPLE, SAVE HER.
"Sorry, dude, that sucks." Hee, hee.
Bring the guitar case?
Okay, FIRST of all... CHARLIE!!!!!!!!!
SECOND of all... he's not breathing. Now, this could be a drug overdose... but, hey, didn't Charlie DROWN? That is, SUFFOCATE with water in his lungs? Not breathing? Why yes. I think he did. I wonder if that has any relevance to this. Probably not, of course, since he was getting high in the bathroom when the turbulence started up.
Wow. In Plane!Time, he swallowed the baggie instead of flushing it.
$10 says the bumper comes off. :(
I lose $10!
She's alive! Thank God! I love her!
Not!Locke is freaking me out.
OMG. THE MONSTER. OMG OMG OMG.
What. the. fuck. What is that circle made of?!
Also, EW. IMPALING IS BAD.
...... wait. The Monster is Jacob's counterpart who is now Not!Locke? Like, that's HIM?
SHE BETTER NOT DIE IN HIS ARMS. I SWEAR TO GOD.
Aw, Christ. This fucking show ruins me.
Jack, you better run.
Aaaaaaaaaaand back on the plane. WTF. Charlie was supposed to die, eh?
Hee, hee, it's the captain. Hi, Weiss!
But where IS Desmond?
Wow. Kate's gonna go to jaaaail.
Ooh, and so's Charlie.
Locke was totally lying about the walkabout.
I gotta say, it's nice to see how the flight could have ended.
Okay. Part one is over.
Questions: What the hell, we have two diverging timelines now? Is that it? Plane!Time and Island!Time?
WHY BRING JULIET BACK JUST TO DIE IN SAWYER'S ARMS?! YOU BASTARDS.
.... THEY LOST THE COFFIN? I'm sorry, I just laughed. Out loud. Hahahahaha.
It seems to me that moving Sayid that much certainly isn't going to be altogether helpful for him.
Books? Oh, so that's one of the French people? I don't remember that episode. Well, I do. But not the exact details.
Oh, smeg. Where's Kate gone? What's happened to the others? Is that whispering the same whispering we heard in the woods?
HOLY CRAP, who ARE these people?!
Has that been on the island the whole TIME?
haha, I do NOT trust Kate.
OH MY GOD, IT'S JACK'S PEN. Hahaha, go Kate, go!!
ooooh. Head injury in the same place as on the plane. Interesting.
SAWYER! That's hilarious, he helped her out, one con man to another criminal.
It worked? What?! Does this explain Plane!Time?
Flight Attendent Lady!
Guitar case time?
What the smegging smeg is an ankh doing in the bloody guitar case? And what does it mean? And is it related to the big ol' statue?
Oh.
There's a note in the ankh.
... or is it a list? Is that THE list? From Season 1?
Oh. It's not the list. Or any list. Crap.
Wow, how frustrating for Sun. Caught between a rock and a hard place.
Hm. Unclear water does not seem to heal wounds? I dunno.
So... they're drowning Sayid?
AHAHAHA, I love seeing Jack get dominated like that. Beautiful. I think that might have been aikido.
"Your friend is dead." Wow, thanks for the news flash there, bucko.
Hm. I don't know what to think about Sayid.
Except that HI, THERE HE IS AT LAX.
Oh, dear. There's the marshall.
CLAIRE! Wow. She's aged. Not that she's old. But she looks a lot older than she did.
Hehe, is it just me or is Jack a wee bit ticked off that Hurley's "the leader" here.
Bwahahaha! "I don't like the way English tastes on my tongue." That's awesome. It IS all harsh and clumsy.
Prepare the ash? Is it just regular ash that protects them from the monster?
These people seem to have a huge sort of contingency plan for all of this. Which again, begs the question, WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Wow, poor Locke.
... where is Not!Locke's home? I'm scared.
Sayid is totally talking to Miles.
Aw, Kate. Why are you gravitating back to Sawyer? Let him grieve.
Pity. I wanna see Sawyer get the best of Jack.
Wow, so weird to see Locke without his scar. I always forget that it's part of the makeup.
So weird to see them in civilization.
I really like Frank.
Ben has spent the entire 80-some minutes of this just staring, mostly slack-jawed, in disbelief.
Okay, so you have a dead Locke, a dead Sayid, a dead Juliet.
... and a not-so-dead Sayid. WTF.
... was. Wait a minute. Whose voice was that? That did not sound like Naveen Andrews. Or is it just that it's 4:35am and I'm ALREADY thinking *way* outside the box?!
This show makes me nuts.
Time to read along with my reactions to the two-hour season premiere of Lost!
Okay.
I'm five minutes in.
And I'm BASICALLY all "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON."
It's good to be watching Lost again.
My main question right now is, if this is the new reality, and I AM NOT CONVINCED THAT IT IS, how much is Jack, or anyone, aware of anything? Also, what the hell kind of destiny has Desmond ON THEIR PLANE?
... I'm sorry, the island is now UNDERWATER?
Sweet mother of God, I love Juliet.
AHAHAHAHA. Love Kate nearly falling out of the tree! But, uh, does this mean she's not on the plane? And is on the island? You know, the island that's underwater?
Wow. The audio is annoying as hell. Nice touch, though?
I MISS MY JULIET IN THE CREDITS. Dammit.
Holy crap, get a load of all the guest stars. Bernard, Rose, various people, JULIET, CHARLIE, and others.
Interesting. Kate, this Kate who was in a relationship with Jack for however long she was, sees Sawyer first, but goes to check on Jack first.
Wait a minute. Jack? Bloody hell, the intro was a dream, wasn't it?
BOONE. Hah!
Holy crap, Sawyer is NOT happy. Can't say I blame him.
"I'm sorry"? That's it? Really? JULIET IS DEAD AND YOU ARE SORRY?
... wait. We're... what? The marshall? Kate in cuffs? WHAT THE FRILLY HECK IS GOING ON HERE?
Haha, they tried with Sawyer's hair. They did. Six points for effort. And ten points for not cutting off Josh Holloway's hair.
Okay, whatever is happening here, this can't be our reality. Hurley has had nothing BUT bad luck since he played the numbers.
Yeah, see? Sitting there with Sayid and Jin, Sayid bleeding to death. That's not unlucky at all. :P
JULIET?! OH MY SWEET GOD, IS THAT JULIET?!
James!! OH MY GOD, JULIET IS ALIVE.
Ewwwww. I'm with Hurley, that's totally gross. Poor Sayid. :( Not only is he in pain, but he's wracked with guilt over all the things he's done.
Oh, Hurley. I love you and your silliness.
Uh, hang on. Isn't that Jacob? Isn't Jacob dead?
Aw, Sun staring at Bernard and Joyce. :(
And Jin is back to being a dick. :(
BOONE!
So wait, did Shannon not go back with Boone?
Is Locke lying his ass off about being on a walkabout?
I'm getting very confused with seeing Plane!People and Island!People.
See? Dead Jacob. Right? So who the hell was talking to Hurley?
It always freaks me out to see Ben being scared. A lot.
Frank! And Sun!
See, Ben's scared. AND SO AM I.
OMG, Juliet! SAVE HER, PEOPLE, SAVE HER.
"Sorry, dude, that sucks." Hee, hee.
Bring the guitar case?
Okay, FIRST of all... CHARLIE!!!!!!!!!
SECOND of all... he's not breathing. Now, this could be a drug overdose... but, hey, didn't Charlie DROWN? That is, SUFFOCATE with water in his lungs? Not breathing? Why yes. I think he did. I wonder if that has any relevance to this. Probably not, of course, since he was getting high in the bathroom when the turbulence started up.
Wow. In Plane!Time, he swallowed the baggie instead of flushing it.
$10 says the bumper comes off. :(
I lose $10!
She's alive! Thank God! I love her!
Not!Locke is freaking me out.
OMG. THE MONSTER. OMG OMG OMG.
What. the. fuck. What is that circle made of?!
Also, EW. IMPALING IS BAD.
...... wait. The Monster is Jacob's counterpart who is now Not!Locke? Like, that's HIM?
SHE BETTER NOT DIE IN HIS ARMS. I SWEAR TO GOD.
Aw, Christ. This fucking show ruins me.
Jack, you better run.
Aaaaaaaaaaand back on the plane. WTF. Charlie was supposed to die, eh?
Hee, hee, it's the captain. Hi, Weiss!
But where IS Desmond?
Wow. Kate's gonna go to jaaaail.
Ooh, and so's Charlie.
Locke was totally lying about the walkabout.
I gotta say, it's nice to see how the flight could have ended.
Okay. Part one is over.
Questions: What the hell, we have two diverging timelines now? Is that it? Plane!Time and Island!Time?
WHY BRING JULIET BACK JUST TO DIE IN SAWYER'S ARMS?! YOU BASTARDS.
.... THEY LOST THE COFFIN? I'm sorry, I just laughed. Out loud. Hahahahaha.
It seems to me that moving Sayid that much certainly isn't going to be altogether helpful for him.
Books? Oh, so that's one of the French people? I don't remember that episode. Well, I do. But not the exact details.
Oh, smeg. Where's Kate gone? What's happened to the others? Is that whispering the same whispering we heard in the woods?
HOLY CRAP, who ARE these people?!
Has that been on the island the whole TIME?
haha, I do NOT trust Kate.
OH MY GOD, IT'S JACK'S PEN. Hahaha, go Kate, go!!
ooooh. Head injury in the same place as on the plane. Interesting.
SAWYER! That's hilarious, he helped her out, one con man to another criminal.
It worked? What?! Does this explain Plane!Time?
Flight Attendent Lady!
Guitar case time?
What the smegging smeg is an ankh doing in the bloody guitar case? And what does it mean? And is it related to the big ol' statue?
Oh.
There's a note in the ankh.
... or is it a list? Is that THE list? From Season 1?
Oh. It's not the list. Or any list. Crap.
Wow, how frustrating for Sun. Caught between a rock and a hard place.
Hm. Unclear water does not seem to heal wounds? I dunno.
So... they're drowning Sayid?
AHAHAHA, I love seeing Jack get dominated like that. Beautiful. I think that might have been aikido.
"Your friend is dead." Wow, thanks for the news flash there, bucko.
Hm. I don't know what to think about Sayid.
Except that HI, THERE HE IS AT LAX.
Oh, dear. There's the marshall.
CLAIRE! Wow. She's aged. Not that she's old. But she looks a lot older than she did.
Hehe, is it just me or is Jack a wee bit ticked off that Hurley's "the leader" here.
Bwahahaha! "I don't like the way English tastes on my tongue." That's awesome. It IS all harsh and clumsy.
Prepare the ash? Is it just regular ash that protects them from the monster?
These people seem to have a huge sort of contingency plan for all of this. Which again, begs the question, WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Wow, poor Locke.
... where is Not!Locke's home? I'm scared.
Sayid is totally talking to Miles.
Aw, Kate. Why are you gravitating back to Sawyer? Let him grieve.
Pity. I wanna see Sawyer get the best of Jack.
Wow, so weird to see Locke without his scar. I always forget that it's part of the makeup.
So weird to see them in civilization.
I really like Frank.
Ben has spent the entire 80-some minutes of this just staring, mostly slack-jawed, in disbelief.
Okay, so you have a dead Locke, a dead Sayid, a dead Juliet.
... and a not-so-dead Sayid. WTF.
... was. Wait a minute. Whose voice was that? That did not sound like Naveen Andrews. Or is it just that it's 4:35am and I'm ALREADY thinking *way* outside the box?!
This show makes me nuts.