And now, for The Boy story you've all been waiting for ...
So, The Boy and I are watching the 2 baby elephants at the Wild Animal Park, and he starts talking about them and their mommies and then asks where the daddy is. So I look over to the big bull in the corner and point him out - but something isn't quite right on the bull - like the shadow of his legs don't quite match up. Just about that point both of us realize that the "not-quite-right-shadow" is actually the male elephant's enormous penis. Both of us are just cackling with amazement, as this monstrous member is as big as The Boy is - nearly dragging on the ground - and prehensile, slithering around and seeking out it's prey like a giant snake suspended from a tree.
At this point, it should be noted that The Boy is on my shoulders and isn't one for discretion, so every word he says might as well be comming from a town cryer - exclaimations of "look at that giant penis!" sounding out amid families and religious school groups.
Now exiting the exhibit and greatly amused, it registers with The Boy that there are more than one mommy and only one daddy - whereupon he realizes that this breaks his concept of one mommy and one daddy having kids to make a family - and so come the avalanche of questions on the subject. Eventually, I figure out how to give him an explaination he can grasp at 5 so that he understands that families aren't always just one mommy and one daddy. THEN the conversation gets intersting.
Sitting atop my shoulders, we're walking to the exit of the park and following behind a mom pushing her two small children in a double-wide stroller on a path too narrow to pass, when The Boy enthusiastically says "well, you knooooowwww, that Kitty's Kittens don't have penises! They pee through their butts!" And proceeds to then detail this out, including how the pee comming out their butts helps soften their poop. Then he has a short think and announces "and the girl kittens don't have vagina's either!" I'm very concious at this point of the families within earshot as I explain that the vagina isn't for pee, that it's for the babies to come out of. This gives the Boy a moment of pause, whereupon he loudly announces his solution that "Kitty's kittens don't come out of the vagina, they CHEW their way out of Kitty's stomach!!!" The Boy then launches into an extremelly detailed description of the whole "chewing their way out" process, the body parts involved, and the aftermath and healing.
It's at this point that the mom in front of us with the double-wide stroller, finds a somewhat wider part of the path, pulls aside and says very politely, "would you guys like to pass?"
At this point, it should be noted that The Boy is on my shoulders and isn't one for discretion, so every word he says might as well be comming from a town cryer - exclaimations of "look at that giant penis!" sounding out amid families and religious school groups.
Now exiting the exhibit and greatly amused, it registers with The Boy that there are more than one mommy and only one daddy - whereupon he realizes that this breaks his concept of one mommy and one daddy having kids to make a family - and so come the avalanche of questions on the subject. Eventually, I figure out how to give him an explaination he can grasp at 5 so that he understands that families aren't always just one mommy and one daddy. THEN the conversation gets intersting.
Sitting atop my shoulders, we're walking to the exit of the park and following behind a mom pushing her two small children in a double-wide stroller on a path too narrow to pass, when The Boy enthusiastically says "well, you knooooowwww, that Kitty's Kittens don't have penises! They pee through their butts!" And proceeds to then detail this out, including how the pee comming out their butts helps soften their poop. Then he has a short think and announces "and the girl kittens don't have vagina's either!" I'm very concious at this point of the families within earshot as I explain that the vagina isn't for pee, that it's for the babies to come out of. This gives the Boy a moment of pause, whereupon he loudly announces his solution that "Kitty's kittens don't come out of the vagina, they CHEW their way out of Kitty's stomach!!!" The Boy then launches into an extremelly detailed description of the whole "chewing their way out" process, the body parts involved, and the aftermath and healing.
It's at this point that the mom in front of us with the double-wide stroller, finds a somewhat wider part of the path, pulls aside and says very politely, "would you guys like to pass?"