(Untitled)

[bring_a_sponge]

 
Picture this:

The Man in Charge. Master of All He Surveys. The Chief. The Boss. The Big Man.

Agent Zed.

In his office at the heart of MiB HQ.

A good day. Quiet. Productive. The kind of day a man expects he'll be able to look back on with tremendous satisfaction.

Well, half a day, anyway....

Comments

"Specially sanctioned by MiB Special Services....."

[bring_a_sponge]

There's a new row of lockers down in that special room in MIB Headquarters. They seem exactly like all the others, save the small panels on the front of each door which bear a very unusual set of letters: α, β, and γ.

Waiting.

Waiting for the crack future.

[3rdtimelucky]

It's here that Goldy rejoins the tour group, bearing a number of steaming mugs on a tray. Thanks to the odor-resistant qualities of her Suit and her hair, and the industrial strength exhaust fan in the break room, it would take a very sensitive nose to detect that she was recently smoking. However, her amused smirk gives away the fact that she's been doing something illicit.

"Okay, I'm here," she announces, handing K a strong black coffee.

"You can quit reeling off the boring trivia now, and get to the important stuff."

Nita gets her tea with two sugars and Jen gets a cappuccino with a sprinkle of cinnamon. Finally, she gives Zed his drink: a low fat caramel macchiato with whipped cream. That smirk of hers isn't going anywhere.

"I thought you liked it black, but Gleeble said this was your favorite," she explains.

[k_in_black]

"It's all important stuff," Zed grumbles, glaring at the low-fatness of his cup.

"Thank you, Darlin'," K smiles. "And this," he continues, turning back to Nita, "Is the locker room...."

[gammagammahey]

Jen is standing in front of their new lockers, holding a sleek black duffel bag. In fact, she's in the middle of unzipping that duffel bag and extracting her laptop to test the antimatter personal laptop lock.

"Thank you, Agent Beta." Jen's been using code names long enough that it sounds vibrant, sincere, and quite smooth. Awkward? Not when you've been calling people "Wonder Man" and "Captain Ultra" with a straight face for the past ten years.

"This is the first test of the benefits package. If the java isn't good, I may resign, Agents K and Zed respectively. Stated for the public record."

Fortunately, the cappuccino is more than passable when she sips it. Goldy gets an appreciative one-armed hug in thanks.

"You remembered the cinnamon! Thank you, sweetie."

The scent of caramel wafts through the air, wanton and absurdly out of place when juxtaposed with Zed.

Jen eyes Zed's cup. Speculatively.

[3rdtimelucky]

In reply to Jen, Goldy stands on her tip toes and pecks the jade giantess on the cheek.

"Of course I didn't. A good MiB Agent never forgets such things."

She retrieves her own cup of coffee and sets the tray down on the nearest bench.

[bring_a_sponge]

"All right, listen up!" Zed growls. "The rest of this day may be going bugfuck, but this part's going to be done right."

"Callahan! Get over here!" Zed points at the spot right in front of locker α.

[nita_callahan]

Nita accepts the tea with a grin and a "Thanks" for Goldy, then goes back to watching the banter with a smile and listening to K's orientation speech with a nod.

At Zed's bark, she straightens up and steps to. "Yeah? --Yes, sir?"

. . . So she's maybe a little nervous, especially when everyone else is so clearly at ease, but she's doing her best not to get rattled.

[bring_a_sponge]

"Juanita L. Callahan."

Zed pauses, sweeping the room with a glare to shut everyone up, before turning back to Nita.

"You will dress only in attire specially sanctioned by MiB Special Services."

"For the duration of your internship, you will conform to the identity we give you. Eat where we tell you. Live where we tell you."

"You will have no identifying marks of any kind. You will not stand out in any way. Your entire image will be crafted to leave no lasting memory with anyone you encounter."

"You are a rumor. Recognizable only as déjà vu and dismissed just as quickly."

"You don't exist. You were never even born."

"Anonymity is your name. Silence,your native tongue."

"You are no longer part of the system. You are above the system. Over it. Beyond it."

"We are 'Them.'"

"We are 'They.'"

"We are the Men in Black."

"And for the duration, Agent α, so are you."

And there, in Zed's outstretched hands, is a crisp new Suit.

[3rdtimelucky]

Goldy sips her coffee as she listens to the speech. At the mention of 'identifying marks' she takes a lock of her instantly recognizable hair between her fingers, and looks at it with interest. She then squints at her rather blatantly green companion.

So much for that rule applying to them. She stifles a snort and continues to listen.

When it's over, she gives Zed a slow golf clap.

"Very professional. Well done."

[gammagammahey]

Jen offers Goldy something amorphously between an affectionately admonishing and utterly indulgent look.

"He is good at this. Come on, sweetie, this is a formative experience for Nita."

Her cappuccino gets set on top of the nearest locker - she is that tall, after all - so she can applaud. Esprit de corps is important, after all!

"Want some help, Nita? Zed, don't you dare tell me this doesn't come with a gravitonic lint roller."

[nita_callahan]

Nita, for her part, stays very quiet and listens very carefully to every word Zed says.

When he offers the suit, she sets aside her tea and echoes, in the Speech, "For the duration."

That's as solemn a binding as she's willing to give -- and it's pretty solemn. It's not a code she'd want to live by indefinitely, but . . . for the duration. Okay.

Then she takes the Suit with both hands, still solemn.

And then attempts not to expire with glee at being Agent Alpha. Seriously, how freaking cool is that?

Moment of solemnity over, she nods at Jen. "Um, sure, that'd be good."

[bring_a_sponge]

Zed, anticipating Nita's next question, points to an alcove leading to changing rooms. Then seeing Goldy and Jen begin following her there, growls,

"Try not to take forever in there, 'Locks. We've got a goddamn galaxy to protect."

[3rdtimelucky]

Goldy looks back at Zed, lip curled in bemusement.

"Give me some credit, Zee. She doesn't need much work."

She lets out a little chuckle and disappears into the changing area, which is nothing more than a glorified unisex bathroom really, complete with sinks, mirrors and a few stalls.

"I don't believe we've been formally introduced yet," she says to Nita, and extends a hand. "I'm Goldilocks. A version of the Earth fairy tale character."

[nita_callahan]

. . . Well, if she's gonna introduce herself like that, Nita won't feel bad about double-taking as she shakes her hand.

"Really? Um, pleasure to meet you! I'm Nita. Wizard et cetera. Dai'stiho."

[gammagammahey]

Jean, meanwhile, is dusting off Nita's new suit jacket and skirt on their hangers, eyeing them critically for signs of quality tailoring. If this thing was cut by a machine rather than a person, she might lodge a formal protest.

"Okay, kiddo, let's get you changed. Chief said all identifying and distinctive markers and accessories except for green skin and manes of shining hair have got to go. Got a zipper bag to put them in? If not, I have spares."

[nita_callahan]

Which finally gets Nita to burst into tension-releasing giggles.

"Sorry," she manages after a minute. "Just. Yeah. This is all a little crazy even for me." Taking the suit, she heads for one of the stalls and adds over her shoulder, "Thanks, but I'll just shove my stuff in a claudication and deal with it later."