::SIGh:: Ayy LIFe
SO its been awhile since i Have written and a lot of things have happened these past weeks.. I don't think it has hit me yet..To start off I no longer live in my grandma's house..just to show how mad I was I broke the watch my grandma gave me which cost like $200.. i threw that shit across my room against the wall and floor..PSYCHO BRIGITTE ON THE LOOSE j/k oo yea I also broke this vase thing my grandma had in the kitchen it shattered all over the kitchen I just looked at it and walked upstairs..as my grandmother got a broom to clean it..Y ou might be wonderin what the FUk did she say to u that made me snap like that..well thats how much she fuked with my feelings..even Eddy was there when she was bitchen over nutin...he couldnt stand 5 mintutes of that.. I put up with like 30 minutes worth of it be4 I cracked.. For those who have met my mother and have seen her in the act of being her bitchy rude self knows that if I can put up with her i can put up with netin.. WEll ladies and gentleman the moment came wen i said THAT IS FUKIN IT!@! and decided to break shit..Believe me I wanted to break EVERYTHING IN THAT HOUSE AND WAS A SMIDGE TOO CLOSE OF DOING SOO....At 1st wen I realized what i did i FELT BAD for like 1 minute.. but then i said Fuk it material shit doesnt matter..I rather have sum1 treat me good then fuking give me anything money can buy...My grandmother is a hypocrite just like my stepmother and living with either one makes me really depressed..therefore I can not live with my grandmother or my dad..My mother is psycho and is movin away in 4 months (counting the days)..basically I am somewhat homeless..except that my b/f and his family have invited me to move in their house till I can get a job and have enough money to get my appartment..which will probably be in awhile..I mean its not that bad I was practically living there even when i was with my grandma..I love his family soo much...I <3 THEM especially u babe..i do not know where i would be without u.. (probably under a bridge no joke) I do not know wat to do because my family disapproves of me living with my b/f because they are gay..but I mean I am really happy but really sad..I miss having my own bed and waking up to my dog bothering the shit outa me.. but its just my parents have said sum really fucked up things about me which are not true..and I am never happy there because we always argue about shit that isnt even my fault..also Im such a chickenshit as my mother knows me best (sometimes not always now that i think about it) because I dont wana get a job and be independent.i just want compromise from my parents..something they don't like to do ever..I want them to beg me to come live with them so that I know wen I do move back they are gona change and not be the same as they were before..but I have changed as well..I mean I finally understand the worth of money and how much you really need it...which sux..for the first time ever all i want money for is to pay gas..nothing else...I have everything I need..