best laid plans and all that
I wanted to. I honestly did.
Adam was upstairs in the bedroom, watching NASCAR, while we waited for Billy and Charlotte to come over. My plan was to walk to the bus stop across the street, catch the 57 to LakeForest, stop in Olde Town, wander into the street festival, find Linda's Zosimos Botanicals booth, and spend some time hanging out and possibly buying some things.
I got halfway to the bus stop before a surge of violent fatigue and crippling pain had me stumbling. It was not anything I did or didn't do. It was just...
Have you ever been in the middle of something, and suddenly your body said Fuck This, and every single ounce of strength, energy, and will was sapped out of you so quickly that you nearly crumpled right where you stood? And then your muscles began to hurt so fiercely you wondered if you might actually make it to a bed, couch, or chair without falling over sobbing?
This is fibromyalgia. Hi.
I am sitting back at my little table in the living room, with a pillow between my back and the chair, with painkillers and coffee in my system, keeping me awake and alert because I just don't want to surrender. And sitting in a chair not moving is much less painful than walking.
I think shortly I'll go to the kitchen and make myself the version of insalata caprese that we made last night. Because I can have walls and counters to lean on, and a salad doesn't require much skill, dexterity, or brainpower.
As the fog keeps rolling in...
Adam was upstairs in the bedroom, watching NASCAR, while we waited for Billy and Charlotte to come over. My plan was to walk to the bus stop across the street, catch the 57 to LakeForest, stop in Olde Town, wander into the street festival, find Linda's Zosimos Botanicals booth, and spend some time hanging out and possibly buying some things.
I got halfway to the bus stop before a surge of violent fatigue and crippling pain had me stumbling. It was not anything I did or didn't do. It was just...
Have you ever been in the middle of something, and suddenly your body said Fuck This, and every single ounce of strength, energy, and will was sapped out of you so quickly that you nearly crumpled right where you stood? And then your muscles began to hurt so fiercely you wondered if you might actually make it to a bed, couch, or chair without falling over sobbing?
This is fibromyalgia. Hi.
I am sitting back at my little table in the living room, with a pillow between my back and the chair, with painkillers and coffee in my system, keeping me awake and alert because I just don't want to surrender. And sitting in a chair not moving is much less painful than walking.
I think shortly I'll go to the kitchen and make myself the version of insalata caprese that we made last night. Because I can have walls and counters to lean on, and a salad doesn't require much skill, dexterity, or brainpower.
As the fog keeps rolling in...