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Chapter 5
A Guide to the Modern Art of Succeeding in Various Endeavours
Always dress Sharply, though Eccentric; be Unique. Render it difficult for people to even decide what it is you actually do - let their Minds oscillate wildly between such Diverse Explanations as "banker", "artist", "art dealer", "businessman", "wealthy European tourist", "writer", "lawyer", &c. However, carry yourself about in a way that it is Perfectly Clear that, whatever it is you do, you are exceptionally Good at it and indispensably Important.
Always carry about your person the following Articles: in your Sinister hand, which is to say, your Left, carry with you a Ledger, for even if you are not a Writer, you still never know when you will need to Write Something Down; and it indicates to people that you are the kind of person who is so burdened with Responsibility that you have to take notes. In the same hand, carry about yourself also a Large, heavy Book, which could be anything one might read for Entertainment, but never a Scholastic Tome, for you do not want to be mistaken for a Student. This allows for you to have at hand - literally - something which could be used as a Weapon, if need be. In your inside jacket pocket, carry about yourself an Implement of Writing, and if possible, a Cellular Communicator. Of your right hand, it should always rest casually in your pants pocket, as though you are in no hurry and, wherever you are going, they can damn well wait on you.
Crosswalks are to be avoided always. If you find yourself in need of Crossing the Street, plan it minutes ahead of time, such that when the way is clear, you may look, for precisely 1/4 of a second, in Both Directions, while at the same time veering toward the curb as though you know, for an absolute fact, that you will be crossing now; thenceforth commence you in a diagonal line to the Other Side.
When walking Downtown, occasionally glance at businesses or Banks, in an appraising way that could be interpreted as either that you are thinking of robbing it or buying it.
When dining in a Japanese Tavern, always order Green Tea. A modest amount of Lemon or Bee-Honey is allowed, but never refined sugar.
Yours,
~Jack Frost.
A Guide to the Modern Art of Succeeding in Various Endeavours
Always dress Sharply, though Eccentric; be Unique. Render it difficult for people to even decide what it is you actually do - let their Minds oscillate wildly between such Diverse Explanations as "banker", "artist", "art dealer", "businessman", "wealthy European tourist", "writer", "lawyer", &c. However, carry yourself about in a way that it is Perfectly Clear that, whatever it is you do, you are exceptionally Good at it and indispensably Important.
Always carry about your person the following Articles: in your Sinister hand, which is to say, your Left, carry with you a Ledger, for even if you are not a Writer, you still never know when you will need to Write Something Down; and it indicates to people that you are the kind of person who is so burdened with Responsibility that you have to take notes. In the same hand, carry about yourself also a Large, heavy Book, which could be anything one might read for Entertainment, but never a Scholastic Tome, for you do not want to be mistaken for a Student. This allows for you to have at hand - literally - something which could be used as a Weapon, if need be. In your inside jacket pocket, carry about yourself an Implement of Writing, and if possible, a Cellular Communicator. Of your right hand, it should always rest casually in your pants pocket, as though you are in no hurry and, wherever you are going, they can damn well wait on you.
Crosswalks are to be avoided always. If you find yourself in need of Crossing the Street, plan it minutes ahead of time, such that when the way is clear, you may look, for precisely 1/4 of a second, in Both Directions, while at the same time veering toward the curb as though you know, for an absolute fact, that you will be crossing now; thenceforth commence you in a diagonal line to the Other Side.
When walking Downtown, occasionally glance at businesses or Banks, in an appraising way that could be interpreted as either that you are thinking of robbing it or buying it.
When dining in a Japanese Tavern, always order Green Tea. A modest amount of Lemon or Bee-Honey is allowed, but never refined sugar.
Yours,
~Jack Frost.