Naruto AU, a long-delayed side story
Yeah, uh - this took way longer than I meant it to. *facepalm* AS DOES EVERYTHING. But trust me, this side story needs to happen before the chapters I can't post yet! Really! Also come on, it's Haku and Kimimaro hanging out, you know you want it.
Contains: minor violence, mentions of interrogation, Haku being the loveliest.
he's not coming back
Although Haku was well enough to walk around, he had been encouraged to stay at the hospital, as his crushed arm required special medical attention, and he had agreed readily; there was little reason to return to Naruto's apartment when Naruto and Sasuke had left that morning and no one else would be there. Haku was rather tired of his hospital room, though, and after lunch asked the nurse's permission to walk around the hospital for exercise.
In truth, the hospital was little more interesting than an empty apartment, but it was a welcome excuse for Haku to stretch his legs and see more than the bland walls of his room and the flowers Sakura had brought the day before. He was able to visit Kakashi, who was sharing a room with a rather energetic friend and didn't seem very happy about it, and some of the chuunin whom he had gotten to know while being watched during his first weeks in Konoha. He thought of visiting Gaara, but according to the nurses Gaara had been released on the same day as Naruto and hadn't been seen in the hospital since.
Haku had considered visiting the Hokage, too, but the poisoned Kages were under extraordinarily sharp surveillance and not allowed visitors, not even family, certainly not orphans who had been the tool of a missing-nin until very recently. Haku understood, but he felt a little disappointed anyway; the Hokage had been kind to him after he had been interrogated and classified as a non-threat, and Haku would have liked to repay that kindness.
As he turned down a hall to find his way back to his room, he found himself running into a tall ANBU guard and caught himself just in time. "Hold up," the guard said, keeping Haku at arm's length, "no unauthorized personnel allowed in this hall - sorry, miss."
Haku didn't correct the guard; he didn't mind being a girl in Konoha, unlike some of the places he had been with Zabuza. "I'm sorry," he said with a smile, "I think I must have taken a wrong turn - do you know how to get back to -"
The door behind the guard opened, and Haku recognized Ino's father in the doorway, supported by a scarred man - Morino Ibiki, Haku remembered, the man who had been in charge of his interrogation. Through the door behind them Haku could see a shock of white hair against a white pillow, and caught a glimpse of an oddly familiar face with two red spots above closed eyes -
Oh.
"- get past that seal," Ino's father said, rubbing his forehead. "Like trying to shove my mind through a wall of fire."
"If the medics agree to increasing the dosage of -"
"Ah, Ibiki-san," the ANBU guard said, "there's someone here, so -"
"Please excuse me for intruding," said Haku, keeping his polite smile up.
"The Mist kid?" Ibiki said. "What are you doing here? This area's off-limits."
"I was lost," Haku said. "My apologies, Ibiki-san. Are you having a difficult time with the interrogation?"
Ibiki grumbled, "You pick up on too much, kid. Yeah."
"It's a side effect of this seal he's got," Yamanaka said, "when I try to - ack - well, you don't need to know the details, I guess." Ibiki's supporting grip had tightened on the other man's shoulder mid-sentence. "Anyway, he's too weak for more traditional methods, so - damn, Ibiki, I get it!"
"I'm sorry to hear it," Haku said again; he considered his next words with great care before saying, "I don't mean to presume, but - I've heard that sometimes, gaining the prisoner's trust first can be a very effective questioning technique..."
"Hn," said Ibiki, eying Haku. "You've heard that, huh? You think we can spare someone to sit around buddying up to a prisoner?"
Haku's smile never cracked as he said, "Of course not, sir, but I believe that I've met this prisoner before."
The ANBU guard tensed a little, and their partner by the door shifted to block it; Ibiki didn't move an inch.
"Met him before?" Yamanaka said. "I don't remember that, and I went through your head pretty thoroughly."
"It was a very brief meeting," said Haku, although the memory of it had come back to him with a surprising vividness - the cool night, the bright moon, the small polite voice asking if they were from Kirigakure. "It had nothing to do with Akatsuki, or any other threat to Konoha."
Ino's father looked thoughtful, but Ibiki said, "So you want me to give you access to a prisoner, who may or may not remember you, because you ran into him once?"
"I wouldn't think of presuming, Ibiki-san," Haku said. His face was beginning to ache with the strain of keeping up his pleasant smile. "But I don't have any responsibilities right now, and if I could be of use to Konoha in any way..."
The ANBU guards glanced at each other, and Yamanaka said, "It couldn't hurt - you cleared the kid yourself, didn't you?"
Haku stayed silent.
Four tense breaths later Ibiki growled, "Fine. These are the rules..."
---
Kimimaro was not as drugged as the medics of Konoha thought he was. It was some side effect of his bloodline, Orochimaru-sama had told him, that let him build up tolerances for foreign substances such as poison at an abnormal rate, and his tolerance for sedatives had been growing before his capture. Still, he had not yet recovered entirely from the fight against Konoha's ANBU and the Sannin Jiraiya, nor had he determined how he could best serve Orochimaru-sama in his current situation; better for him to remain in the hospital bed, letting the Konoha interrogators wear themselves out, while he considered his options.
He paid no particular attention to the passing of time, but tracked the changing of his guards by their chakra signatures, which they didn't attempt to hide. When the guard inside his room moved to the door directly after another futile attempt at interrogation, he began to pull himself out of his contemplation; when a new person with an unfamiliar chakra signature entered and took a seat, his guard went up. Had his questioners gotten frustrated and brought in someone new? But the new person didn't touch him, didn't come near him, said nothing; he was about to dismiss them as simply a new guard or nurse when a soft voice said, "So it is you, after all - I wasn't completely sure, it's been some time."
Kimimaro turned his head and dredged his eyelids open enough to see a blurry outline seated next to the wall. A blurry outline with - he blinked and tried to focus - long, dark hair, and a round face that he had seen before, younger and softer... "You," he said. "Outside Mist."
"You remember me," the familiar stranger said, and they smiled. "I wasn't sure if you would - it was such a long time ago, and a very brief meeting. How strange it is for us to meet again here..."
Kimimaro let his eyes close and felt something through the haze of sedatives that might have been astonishment. He had often remembered that night - it had been his first night out of his cell, and the night that had led to the morning when he had met Orochimaru-sama; it would be far stranger if he didn't remember it - but he could not truthfully admit to ever thinking very much about the two people he had met on the way to Kirigakure. He had never expected he would see either of them again, least of all in the stronghold of Orochimaru-sama's enemies.
Several questions came to mind, but he asked only one. "How?"
"How did I end up here?"
"Yes," Kimimaro said, and forced his eyes open again to watch the stranger.
"Hmm..." They looked to the side, considering. "It's a complicated story, really, and you seem a bit tired. Maybe we can talk about it tomorrow, I don't want to be too troublesome."
An ache was beginning to build in Kimimaro's bones from keeping himself alert, but he ignored it and said, "Your name?"
"Oh, yes - we didn't introduce ourselves before, did we?" the stranger said. "I'm Haku - what's your name?"
He considered the risk of sharing his name, then discarded it; it would give away nothing, as he had no reputation outside of Sound. "Kimimaro."
"It's nice to meet you again, Kimimaro-kun," said Haku, smiling; as the smile blurred Kimimaro closed his eyes again, and found, to his great surprise, that he agreed.
---
When Haku visited again, Kimimaro thought that about a day had passed. The usual interrogators had come and gone, but their attempt to force information had been brief and halfhearted, barely an interrogation at all, and Haku had appeared soon after. So they thought to get information from him through a friendly approach? They would be quickly disappointed.
As Haku had come in, Kimimaro had heard one of the ANBU say, "Excuse us, miss," and so he decided that he wouldn't give Haku the opportunity to take the offensive; he gathered his strength while Haku sat, and said, "Are you a girl?"
"Ah, you heard the ANBU?" Haku said. "Hmm - no, I'm not technically a girl. But I don't care if people think I am one, and for some reason a lot of people seem to... Does it matter to you?"
That gave Kimimaro pause, but he said, "No."
"I'm glad to hear it," Haku said, and Kimimaro forced his eyes open to see a smile on Haku's face. "One of my best friends is a girl, after all."
In his mind, Kimimaro reluctantly conceded the first round to Haku, and waited for Haku to begin questioning him. But Haku didn't ask any questions. Instead the other boy was quiet for a few moments, and then he began to talk about his friends. He didn't tell the story that Kimimaro had asked for, of how Haku had come to Konoha; only trivial, everyday stories, of funny conversations and training mishaps and minor arguments. Boring stories, with no information of any interest that Kimimaro could bring back to Orochimaru, and yet Kimimaro made the effort to listen rather than let the words flow past him. There was something warm in Haku's voice when he spoke about his friends that kept his attention and reminded him a little of Juugo, although, of course, it would not lead Kimimaro to reveal any information about Sound or Orochimaru-sama. He would never be so susceptible to such simple emotional manipulation as that.
As he listened, an unfamiliar feeling began to creep along his nerves. At first he thought it might only be the sedatives wearing off faster than usual, but there was a heaviness to this sensation that didn't usually accompany the fading of the sedatives; keeping the motion slow and subtle, he tested the restraints on his left arm. They remained tight, but with his strength returning, there was just enough give that he could activate the seal and break free, if it became necessary.
That realization gave him a name for the unfamiliar feeling, and in the middle of Haku's story he said, "Foolish."
"Eh?"
"This is foolish," Kimimaro said. "If I were stronger -" He was already strong enough, but only he needed to know that. "- I could use you as a hostage. To get away." For some reason this had caused him to worry; whenever he decided to break free he doubted he would need Haku as a hostage, but he didn't like to think of Haku being so careless.
"Oh, I don't think so," said Haku, and his light voice cooled. "It's true I couldn't stop you, but I'm not a real citizen of Konoha - nobody would think twice about killing me to prevent you from escaping, besides my friends, and they're not here at the moment. I'm sorry if that ruins your escape plans, although -" He smiled, and the warmth returned to his voice. "- it's kind of you to be concerned for me."
Kimimaro shut his eyes, but he didn't deny his concern. Haku didn't resume his stories, and after a few moments of silence, he said, "Do you have any friends? They're probably worried about you by now..."
"Friends?"
"Someone important to you," Haku said. "I thought - well, I suppose I hadn't thought about you in a long time, before I saw you were here, but the first time we met, I thought you looked very lonely... Sometimes, when I was younger, I wondered if you had ever met anyone who would be important to you - I always hoped that you had."
Kimimaro considered this. He didn't associate with many shinobi in Sound beyond his direct subordinates, who were certainly not friends; he lived for Orochimaru-sama, and - well, there was Juugo, the boy whose blood Orochimaru-sama had used to create the cursed seal. Juugo was a gentle person when his blood didn't turn him into a berserker, but when it did only Kimimaro could keep him from hurting others, and so he had grown accustomed to accompanying Juugo in his spare time. Juugo could be good company while he was calm, and with slight amazement Kimimaro realized that he had in some way missed Juugo's quiet presence. Of course, Orochimaru-sama came first, always, since he was the one who had given meaning to Kimimaro's existence...
He hadn't answered Haku's question. "Yes," he said, "I have," his voice dry and scratchy.
"I'm really glad," said Haku, and the happiness in his voice did seem genuine. "Being a shinobi, or even just living in the shinobi countries - it's so easy never to have anyone, to lose your family and your friends and your purpose... It's hard to live that way; I'm glad you have someone."
Kimimaro's throat felt rough and sore, and he thought that he ought to go to sleep and let Haku talk or leave as he wished, but without planning to he asked, "What about the man you were with that night?"
A frozen silence; then Haku said softly, "He's dead now."
I'm sorry, Kimimaro meant to say, but he began to cough and the words drowned in bubbles of blood and drugs as he slipped out of awareness; he was never sure if he had managed to say them aloud.
---
Haku continued to visit Kimimaro every morning for the next few days, although he wasn't sure how useful his visits were in gathering information; he did most of the talking, still, with only occasional short observations or answers to innocuous questions from Kimimaro. He liked talking with Kimimaro anyway, but he did worry that he wasn't accomplishing what he had promised Ibiki.
When he had mentioned his concern to Ibiki after one conversation, the man had only shrugged. "Kid," he'd said, "you got his name out of him on the first day you talked to him, and that's more than we managed. It's a slow process, gathering intelligence like this - don't worry about the time and don't rush and get his guard up, you're doing fine."
Haku had nodded and agreed and smiled, and behind his smile he had continued to worry that he was spending too much time trying to become Kimimaro's friend and not enough trying to get information out of him. Even behind the smile, he didn't let himself think that perhaps he cared more about Kimimaro than about information.
They hadn't spoken about Zabuza again.
"Try to move your little finger without moving any of the others," Kabuto said, and Haku tried. The little finger on his outstretched right hand twitched feebly, and when he tried again, all of his fingers jerked up.
"Hm," said Kabuto.
Haku was beginning to dislike his afternoon examinations by the medics. The medics were always encouraging and cheerful as they poked at his right arm and asked him questions, but they had yet to give him any kind of firm answer as to when his arm would be healed. Kabuto was the most inscrutable of them all, although polite and likable otherwise; since Sasuke's outburst, Haku had begun paying more attention to him, but he hadn't yet been able to discover anything that would explain why Sasuke had thought Haku would recognize the medic from somewhere else.
Kabuto turned Haku's hand over and began to tap lightly on the pads of each one, causing them to twitch. "Good, good," he said, and Haku wished for the thousandth time that Sasuke had not been so stubbornly close-mouthed. Just one hint, one clue as to why Kabuto's voice should have a familiar ring...
"Ah, good," said Kabuto, and he released Haku's hand. "It looks like the nerves haven't been too badly damaged, although -" He smiled, but there was something pitying in it. "- I'm afraid that the damage to the muscles and tendons was quite severe all along your arm. Your right arm will certainly be usable for everyday tasks, but it's highly unlikely that you'll regain full functionality."
"Oh," Haku said.
"Please don't let it bother you too much," Kabuto said, still smiling. "After all, you work at - hm, Ichiraku Ramen, don't you? I don't think the damage will interfere with your job there at all. It would be a different story if you were a shinobi or trying to become one, but since you aren't..."
"No, I'm not," Haku agreed, and turned his head to look out the window. "Thank you for telling me."
"Well, I need to continue my rounds - I'll see you later, Haku-kun," Kabuto said. Haku continued to stare out the window as he listened to Kabuto stand up, fuss with his lab coat, and close the door, and even when he was sure Kabuto was truly gone he couldn't bring himself to move, as if any further movement would make the medic's words irrevocably true.
As if he were watching himself come to the realization from very far away, Haku thought that he hated Kabuto.
Immediately at this realization, the thought of staying in his room became unbearable. He got up from the chair he had been sitting in for the examination and left, with no clear idea of where he meant to go besides out of the room and away.
If his friends had been in Konoha, he thought he would have gone to them; as it was, he was not entirely surprised when he ended up facing the ANBU guards outside of Kimimaro's room. One of them wore a boar mask, the other a horse, and by hair and build Haku could tell they were not the pair that had been guarding Kimimaro earlier.
The horse-masked ANBU said, "Hey, don't you usually visit in the morning?"
"I do," Haku said, with his customary smile; he still felt as if he were watching himself act from a great distance, but he couldn't let that show, or anything that might make the ANBU suspicious. "I thought that it might be helpful if I visited the prisoner twice a day, since I don't stay very long."
Horse and boar exchanged looks, and the boar said, "I don't think it would be a problem, but we'll have to search you again since you left the room."
"Of course, I understand," said Haku, and quietly stood through the quick but thorough inspection the boar-masked ANBU made. Haku had never made the mistake of trying to visit Kimimaro armed - he did keep a few of his needles in his hospital room, in case of an emergency, but never carried them anywhere else in the hospital - and when the ANBU decided he was clean, they let him into Kimimaro's room.
Kimimaro appeared to be asleep as Haku entered, but after Haku had sat down, Kimimaro's eyes slid open a fraction in narrow crescents of light green. "You're back," he said. "Early."
"Yes," Haku said, "I hope you don't mind. I just wanted to talk with you again for a little bit... If you're too tired, I can go."
A brief silence, and then Kimimaro said, "It's fine," his eyes shutting again.
"Thank you."
Haku distantly considered his conversational options. He shouldn't begin with a serious story, which meant putting off the story of how he had ended up in Konoha for at least a few more minutes, or another day. Something light, maybe a little funny, that didn't give away any information... Perhaps one of Naruto-kun's stories about retrieving that noblewoman's cat who kept escaping. Yes, that would be a good start. Haku would tell that story first.
"I can't be a shinobi anymore," he said.
Oh. That wasn't what Haku had meant to say at all. He had meant to be light and cheerful and not bothered by Kabuto's words, by the poorly concealed condescension in Kabuto's voice, by Kabuto's false pity. He reached up with his left hand to push a strand of hair out of his face, and it trembled. Oh dear.
If only Kimimaro would say something. Anything, it didn't matter, so that Haku could apologize and change the subject to something else, but Kimimaro said nothing and Haku's treacherous mouth opened.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that," all right, that was acceptable. "But it's almost funny, somehow," and his voice cracked, oh no, that wasn't at all acceptable but he couldn't stop. "I thought that I didn't mind not being a shinobi. I had my friends, and I was working at a ramen shop, and I thought that I was happy... And then when it mattered, it turned out that I wanted to fight after all, that I wanted to protect my friends. It didn't go very well, but even so - I thought that when I got better, I'd start training seriously again and try to join the Konoha shinobi, so I could fight alongside my friends. But I can't," and he covered his eyes with his left hand and felt tears, cold and damp. "My arm won't heal right, so I can't be a ninja. It's funny, isn't it? Just when I realized what I wanted, it's taken away, and I'm useless... I couldn't protect Zabuza-san, and I can't help my friends - I'm just a worthless person again," his mouth twisting bitterly on the words. "If I could have just died with Zabuza-san -"
"Stop it," Kimimaro said, and a little shock ran through Haku. "You aren't worthless. Even if you can't fight."
Haku wiped his eyes and looked up.
Kimimaro had opened his eyes and turned his head to watch Haku, a slight frown on his face. "Do your friends care if you can fight?" he asked.
Haku sniffled, and after a moment's thought said, "No. No, I don't think so..."
"I don't care, either," said Kimimaro. "So it doesn't matter. If your friends still care about you, then you aren't worthless." He closed his eyes again.
Haku sniffled one more time, then wiped away the last of the tears on his cheeks. "I suppose you have a point," he said. "I - I hadn't thought of it in quite that way."
"You can always find a way to be useful." Kimimaro's voice was growing raspy, as Haku had noticed it often did when Kimimaro was getting tired, but he continued. "I can no longer become a vessel for Orochimaru-sama, but still - there are still ways for me to serve him... Neither of us are useless."
"You're right," Haku said, and his smile this time was unforced. "I'm sure that Orochimaru must think very highly of you - he's lucky to have someone so dedicated." He wished that he could reach over and take Kimimaro's hand, but of course physical contact with a prisoner was forbidden, and Kimimaro might not appreciate such a gesture, anyway.
He ought to be going; he stood up and said, "I should let you rest, but - thank you for listening, Kimimaro-kun. It was - it was very kind."
Kimimaro didn't answer immediately, and Haku was opening the door when he heard a faint, "I'm not kind."
"Pardon?"
"I'm not kind," said Kimimaro, his voice rough as it faded out. "My friend Juugo - it's what he told me. That's all. It's not because I'm kind."
"Ah," Haku said. "Then I'm glad we both have such good friends. I'll see you tomorrow, Kimimaro-kun," and he closed the door gently and left.
---
It was becoming clear to Kimimaro that he needed to escape.
He had not yet revealed any information that could compromise Sound or Orochimaru-sama, nor had Haku asked for any such information, but Kimimaro could feel his sympathy for Haku growing greater with each of their brief meetings; if he didn't leave Konoha soon, he would find it difficult to leave at all. He had already found himself trying to plan a route of escape that would involve the least damage to the ANBU guards and the civilians of Konoha, which shouldn't be a part of his calculations at all. Yes, it was past time for him to return to Orochimaru-sama; it was just the method and the proper moment that he needed to decide upon.
He was considering the possibilities when he heard the muffled conversation of the guards outside his door interrupted by a familiar voice. Reluctantly, he pulled himself out of his thoughts and waited, and a few minutes later, he heard the door open. "- sure it's okay?" one of the guards said, and the other one replied, "Yes, it's normal for interns to trade shifts, and Yakushi has clearance to treat prisoners."
"Sorry to disturb the routine," the familiar voice said. "It should only take a few minutes, unless you've noticed any changes in his condition..."
"No, go ahead. Bear will keep an eye on him for you."
"Thank you."
Kimimaro opened his eyes just enough to see Yakushi Kabuto standing over him, and a bear-masked ANBU hovering behind Kabuto's shoulder. He wasn't surprised. Orochimaru had told him that Kabuto would remain in Konoha if the attempt on the Kages were to fail, although Kimimaro hadn't considered the information of much use; he could escape with his own strength, and any attempted aid from Kabuto would only risk the spy being revealed, without benefit to Orochimaru.
In fact it was puzzling that Kabuto had taken the trouble to see Kimimaro at all, as it would be difficult for Kabuto to tell him anything with the ANBU keeping an eye on them both and the camera that Kimimaro had long ago spotted in one corner of the room, and Kimimaro kept his attention focused on Kabuto as the medic flipped through his chart. "Hmm, let's see -"
"No talking to the prisoner," the bear-masked ANBU said.
"Of course not, sorry," said Kabuto, as Kimimaro watched his hands subtly begin to form seals, hidden from the camera and the ANBU's view among the sheets of paper. "I was just talking out loud to myself, it's a bad habit of mine, I'm afraid," and a second Kabuto stepped out from behind him.
"I'll be as quick as possible," the first Kabuto said, and the second added, "Don't react, Kimimaro-kun, this is only a genjutsu."
Kimimaro didn't react; he let himself blink once, and listened as the first Kabuto checked his IV.
"Our master has gotten impatient," the second Kabuto said. "He wants you to return as soon as you can - though there's one little thing he'd like you to finish first."
The Kages, Kimimaro thought. Naturally, since Orochimaru-sama had been forced to leave the fight before striking the final blow, he wanted his most trusted servant to complete the task.
"This should keep him under control," said a Kabuto, and the other said, "I've switched out the medications, so you should be feeling more alert soon. I'll come back for you this evening and we'll take care of that last little errand, all right? I'll be returning with you, as Orochimaru-sama requires my skills."
Kimimaro continued not to answer.
"You can dispel the genjutsu now," Kabuto said, and a moment later, "I'm done - thanks for your patience."
Kimimaro shut his eyes, and his right hand twitched as he thought, Kai.
"Wait - did you see the prisoner move just now?" the ANBU guard said.
"Hm? No, sorry, I was updating the chart. Is there a problem?"
Kimimaro kept his eyes closed and lay still; after a moment the guard said, "I guess not. You can go now."
The door clicked shut, and Kimimaro heard the guard settle back into the chair. "Hmf - weird guy, no wonder he's still an intern," she said. "Too bad that pretty friend of yours isn't a medic, huh? I'd rather be looked after by someone cute like that than by a spacey intern who can't even pass the chuunin exams."
Trash. Kabuto was more than capable of handling an ANBU or five; Konoha would learn that soon enough. Kimimaro only had to wait, and he would be able to leave behind this soft, silly village and return to Orochimaru's side, to the place that he truly belonged.
Yet an unpleasant chill settled over him as he lay still and waited for evening to fall, and he could feel no eagerness at all.
---
Haku had asked Ibiki if it was all right for him to visit Kimimaro more frequently, and Ibiki had told him it was fine, visit whenever, as long as it didn't make the prisoner suspicious of Haku. Haku had thus started to make a habit of going to see Kimimaro twice a day, once in the morning, and then again either in the late afternoon or the early evening. It seemed to be effective; just yesterday Kimimaro had talked about the day he had met Orochimaru, without even being asked.
That story, told in a few simple sentences, weighed heavily on Haku's mind as he went for his evening visit with Kimimaro. To think that Kimimaro had met the snake Sannin so soon after running into Haku and Zabuza - it gave Haku a curious feeling of regret. If only he had spoken more to Kimimaro that night, if he had said something to Zabuza-san, then maybe... But no, that was a foolish idea. Zabuza-san wouldn't have wanted to pick up another stray child.
Occupied with his thoughts, Haku was almost at the door of Kimimaro's room when he realized that the two ANBU guards stationed outside the door hadn't challenged him yet; he paused to wait for them to notice his presence. Really, they should be more alert - he hadn't been trying to be stealthy at -
They weren't breathing.
Haku's left hand went instinctively to his hair, but the needles he usually concealed there had been left behind in his room. Of course. Damn.
He ought to leave at once and call for more ANBU, he wouldn't be of any use here injured and unarmed, but he took one silent step closer to the ANBU (killed as they stood, better to bring all the information he could with him) and the hall's cold light glinted along the thin silver handles of the scalpels in their throats.
Panic slammed into Haku, and he forced himself to swallow, to be still and let the fear wash over him and pass. He almost reached for one of the scalpels, just to have a weapon, but pulled his hand back in time - it would look too suspicious if he took one. He grasped the door's handle instead and eased it open without a sound. Just a crack, just wide enough to see the third guard slumped in the chair and the edge of a dark cloak, to hear "- have to be quick, Kimimaro-kun" in a light voice -
- "Oh dear, I was only aiming for your arm -" as the world went dark -
- "There was someone else - a man in a cloak" -
- "Don't you know him? Don't you remember?" -
Haku did now. Too late. I'm sorry, Sasuke-kun, you were right... He breathed in, crouched, opened the door a little wider, and slipped inside.
The Akatsuki puppet had his back to Haku; Kimimaro sat on the edge of the bed, his head turned toward the puppet (Kabuto) and the door. Haku froze, as if perfect stillness could somehow hide him, but Kimimaro's cool green eyes passed over him without blinking.
"They're in separate rooms, of course," Kabuto said, "which means we'll have to split up - I have clearance to treat the Kazekage, so I'll handle him. You can take this cloak and one of the ANBU masks and take care of the Hokage, and we'll meet up at the wall after we're both done."
He should have brought his needles. He should have taken one of the scalpels out of the guards. He had a useless, aching arm and no weapons and the man who had killed Zabuza-san was standing right in front of him, talking about killing the person who had allowed Haku to stay in Konoha with Sakura and Sasuke and Naruto. Haku had never considered himself to be reckless, but it was all he could do not to throw himself directly at Kabuto and go for his throat.
Instead he began to make seals with his good hand, preparing the subtlest genjutsu he knew. If Kimimaro didn't give him away, if Kabuto didn't sense him, he could get away when they left and alert someone in time to protect the Kages...
"It's a pity, though," said Kabuto. "I was so relieved to learn that you -"
Haku moved, and a scalpel sliced through only a few strands of his hair and not his eye.
"- had survived," Kabuto finished; he had turned when he'd thrown the scalpel and shifted position as Haku dodged, and now he was in front of the door and Haku would have to fight to get past him.
"You have such an intriguing ability," Kabuto said. "My master would have been so pleased to have a chance to study it - but we can't afford to carry dead weight along. We'll have to make a quick exit, after all." Under the cloak's hood, Haku could see a smirk.
Haku kept his back to the wall as he stood. He'd never escape, but if he could slow Kabuto down long enough for someone to realize something was wrong... "I won't let you get out of here so easily," he said.
Kabuto gave a small, polite laugh. "Do you think you can stop both of us in your condition?" he said, though Kimimaro had yet to make a move. "Don't forget, I'm one of your medics. I know exactly what you can't do - just give up and die quietly, like a good child."
"Ah, that's true," Haku said, and he smiled. "But I think you must not have watched me fight very closely, Kabuto-san, or you would have remembered what I can do..."
Kabuto struck, but Haku was gone, and the doorway filled with bars of ice.
"And you forgot," Haku whispered into Kabuto's ear, and Kabuto turned and found nothing there. "I wasn't a good child at all."
Ice spiraled up from under Kabuto's feet and he jumped just in time, only to find that the ice had disappeared. He was still in the air when it spiked up again right in front of his nose, but Kabuto wasn't as unnerved by the move as Haku had hoped; he used the spike to launch himself back at the doorway instead, and his momentum was enough to crash through the icy bars.
Haku had hidden himself against the wall in a genjutsu, but it wouldn't be strong enough to hide him for long, and he couldn't produce enough ice to keep up the fight for much longer. He let the genjutsu drop and ran for the door (Kimimaro-kun, please forgive me, please don't stop me) and Kabuto's hand smashed into his stomach and sent him flying back. He couldn't catch himself and sprawled on the floor, trying to catch his breath as agony twisted through his right arm; then Kabuto was on top of him, pinning him down with a knee on his chest, and blue chakra edged Kabuto's right hand.
"You're quick, Haku-kun," said Kabuto; his hood had fallen back, and the light shone off his glasses. "But your timing is all wrong... I'm so sorry it has to end this way," and his hand came down.
It jarred against bone - but not one of Haku's.
"Kimimaro-kun? What are you doing?" Kabuto said, and Haku stared at the strange sword that was holding off Kabuto's hand. "We need to get rid of this little problem and -"
"Enough," Kimimaro said. "We're leaving now."
"But - the Kages," said Kabuto, sounding as confused as Haku felt. "We have to kill them - it's an order from Orochimaru-sama, you can't refuse."
"Your fight has been too much of a disturbance," Kimimaro said dispassionately. "There's no time. We're leaving." He twisted the boney sword up and forced Kabuto off Haku's chest; Haku scrambled back and sat up, poised to make seals if necessary.
Kabuto glanced between Haku and Kimimaro, calculating. Then he smiled, stood up, and dusted off his cloak. "Just as you say," he said. "If you'll allow me, I'll clean up here and we can be -"
"If you try to harm Haku again, I'll bring only your head back to Orochimaru-sama," said Kimimaro.
Kabuto's smile fractured for an instant before it smoothed out. He said, "Of course. Let's hurry, then," and the two of them were gone.
Haku breathed in deeply, raggedly, with amazement that he was still breathing; then he leaped up, staggered briefly, and ran after them, his arm protesting with every step.
The hall outside was empty, but Haku heard shouting and crashing to his left and turned that way. Another hall along and there were ANBU and medics on the floor, groaning but alive, and spikes of bone along the walls, and a flash of white hair going around the corner - "Kimimaro-kun, wait! Please wait!'
There was no sign of Kabuto when Haku turned the corner, but Kimimaro spun in the midst of bone blades, knocking aside the ANBU and chuunin trying to stop him. Haku dodged between the bones as the last of the shinobi collapsed, clutching their knee; Kimimaro turned to go and Haku said "Wait, please," and reached for his hand, lacing his fingers with Kimimaro's. "Don't go - you don't have to go back to Orochimaru, you can stay here. I'll vouch for you, it'll be fine. You can meet my friends when they come home, I know they'll like you, even Sasuke - please, stay here, you don't have to leave..."
For a moment Kimimaro's fingers tightened around Haku's, his skin burning hot as if with a fever. "I'm glad that I could meet you again," he said, and smiled for the first time that Haku could remember, small and sweet. "Take care, Haku."
Yelling echoed from further down the hall, and Kimimaro's hand slipped from Haku's and he was gone.
Haku took a single step after him; his legs shook and he had to stop, leaning against one of the bone spikes that Kimimaro had left behind. He was still leaning on it when a single ANBU in a crow mask came running down the hall. "Did you see anyone suspicious pass this way?" he asked.
"Yes," Haku said, "but I'm not sure which way he went - it was a few minutes ago..."
The ANBU glanced briefly across the hallway and the incapacitated shinobi, and through the mask's eyeholes Haku could see red eyes, the pupils surrounded by three black tomoe. Sharingan, but more advanced than Sasuke's... "Excuse me," Haku said, "but - are you Sasuke's brother?" All Haku knew about Sasuke's brother he had learned from Naruto's attempts to explain why Sasuke never talked about him, which, in the way of Naruto's explanations, had eventually come down to, "Uh, it's just kind of complicated?"; Haku had been curious about him ever since, but now that he was in front of Haku, Haku could only think of trying to distract him for a few moments.
The ANBU's eyes focused on him, and Haku crushed the instinct to flee. "Yes, I'm Itachi," the ANBU said. "You're one of Sasuke's friends - Haku? He's mentioned you a few times."
"Ah, yes, that's me..."
"It's good to meet you - I'm sorry that we haven't been able to meet before."
"Oh, no, I understand, I'm sure you must be very busy in ANBU," Haku said, smiling. "I'm glad that we could meet now - perhaps once Sasuke is back, we could all talk again together?"
"Yes, that sounds like a good idea," said Itachi. "Please excuse me for now, Haku-kun, I'm afraid I have to work."
"Of course, don't let me keep you - I should go back to my room, I think."
Itachi bowed slightly and vanished; after a few moments, Haku let his smile fade, and began to try and work out the quickest way to his hospital room.
---
Ibiki collared Haku as he was returning to the room and took him directly for questioning about Kimimaro's escape. Haku gave as many details as he could, but it still took a long time; Ibiki wasn't satisfied until finally someone came in and told him that there had been no casualties other than the three ANBU guarding Kimimaro, and that Kimimaro and Kabuto had successfully escaped. Only then would he allow Haku to go, with a grudging injunction to "get some rest, we'll need to talk to you again tomorrow."
It was already tomorrow, in a technical sense, but Haku was grateful for a break. The hospital was still busy getting itself back into order, and it was easy enough for him to slip out rather than return to his room; he'd had enough of the hospital, for now.
When he opened the door to Naruto's apartment, it was dark, of course, though a little bit of the predawn light seeped through a window. He went in, slipping off his sandals. The faint scent of old ramen hung in the air, as it always did; no matter how much Haku aired the apartment out, the smell never seemed to go away, but for once it made Haku smile rather than irritating him. The smell of ramen and the scattered mess Haku could see in the rest of the apartment were both comfortingly familiar. All the scene needed was for Naruto to come crashing in, shouting about his latest mission...
But there was no Naruto, banging about in the kitchen and bragging. No Sakura, scolding Naruto to eat better and trying to hide her laughter at his stories. No Sasuke, making harsh remarks even as he helped sort out Naruto's attempts to cook.
Haku crouched down, heedless of the open door, and wrapped his arms around himself as best he could. "Please come home soon," he whispered. "Please hurry and come home..."
And please make it back safely, Kimimaro-kun.
Naruto, characters, etc. © Kishimoto WHO GAVE ME HEAVEN AND THEN COCKBLOCKED IT WITH KABUTO BACKSTORY GODDAMNIT NO ONE CARES
Contains: minor violence, mentions of interrogation, Haku being the loveliest.
he's not coming back
Although Haku was well enough to walk around, he had been encouraged to stay at the hospital, as his crushed arm required special medical attention, and he had agreed readily; there was little reason to return to Naruto's apartment when Naruto and Sasuke had left that morning and no one else would be there. Haku was rather tired of his hospital room, though, and after lunch asked the nurse's permission to walk around the hospital for exercise.
In truth, the hospital was little more interesting than an empty apartment, but it was a welcome excuse for Haku to stretch his legs and see more than the bland walls of his room and the flowers Sakura had brought the day before. He was able to visit Kakashi, who was sharing a room with a rather energetic friend and didn't seem very happy about it, and some of the chuunin whom he had gotten to know while being watched during his first weeks in Konoha. He thought of visiting Gaara, but according to the nurses Gaara had been released on the same day as Naruto and hadn't been seen in the hospital since.
Haku had considered visiting the Hokage, too, but the poisoned Kages were under extraordinarily sharp surveillance and not allowed visitors, not even family, certainly not orphans who had been the tool of a missing-nin until very recently. Haku understood, but he felt a little disappointed anyway; the Hokage had been kind to him after he had been interrogated and classified as a non-threat, and Haku would have liked to repay that kindness.
As he turned down a hall to find his way back to his room, he found himself running into a tall ANBU guard and caught himself just in time. "Hold up," the guard said, keeping Haku at arm's length, "no unauthorized personnel allowed in this hall - sorry, miss."
Haku didn't correct the guard; he didn't mind being a girl in Konoha, unlike some of the places he had been with Zabuza. "I'm sorry," he said with a smile, "I think I must have taken a wrong turn - do you know how to get back to -"
The door behind the guard opened, and Haku recognized Ino's father in the doorway, supported by a scarred man - Morino Ibiki, Haku remembered, the man who had been in charge of his interrogation. Through the door behind them Haku could see a shock of white hair against a white pillow, and caught a glimpse of an oddly familiar face with two red spots above closed eyes -
Oh.
"- get past that seal," Ino's father said, rubbing his forehead. "Like trying to shove my mind through a wall of fire."
"If the medics agree to increasing the dosage of -"
"Ah, Ibiki-san," the ANBU guard said, "there's someone here, so -"
"Please excuse me for intruding," said Haku, keeping his polite smile up.
"The Mist kid?" Ibiki said. "What are you doing here? This area's off-limits."
"I was lost," Haku said. "My apologies, Ibiki-san. Are you having a difficult time with the interrogation?"
Ibiki grumbled, "You pick up on too much, kid. Yeah."
"It's a side effect of this seal he's got," Yamanaka said, "when I try to - ack - well, you don't need to know the details, I guess." Ibiki's supporting grip had tightened on the other man's shoulder mid-sentence. "Anyway, he's too weak for more traditional methods, so - damn, Ibiki, I get it!"
"I'm sorry to hear it," Haku said again; he considered his next words with great care before saying, "I don't mean to presume, but - I've heard that sometimes, gaining the prisoner's trust first can be a very effective questioning technique..."
"Hn," said Ibiki, eying Haku. "You've heard that, huh? You think we can spare someone to sit around buddying up to a prisoner?"
Haku's smile never cracked as he said, "Of course not, sir, but I believe that I've met this prisoner before."
The ANBU guard tensed a little, and their partner by the door shifted to block it; Ibiki didn't move an inch.
"Met him before?" Yamanaka said. "I don't remember that, and I went through your head pretty thoroughly."
"It was a very brief meeting," said Haku, although the memory of it had come back to him with a surprising vividness - the cool night, the bright moon, the small polite voice asking if they were from Kirigakure. "It had nothing to do with Akatsuki, or any other threat to Konoha."
Ino's father looked thoughtful, but Ibiki said, "So you want me to give you access to a prisoner, who may or may not remember you, because you ran into him once?"
"I wouldn't think of presuming, Ibiki-san," Haku said. His face was beginning to ache with the strain of keeping up his pleasant smile. "But I don't have any responsibilities right now, and if I could be of use to Konoha in any way..."
The ANBU guards glanced at each other, and Yamanaka said, "It couldn't hurt - you cleared the kid yourself, didn't you?"
Haku stayed silent.
Four tense breaths later Ibiki growled, "Fine. These are the rules..."
---
Kimimaro was not as drugged as the medics of Konoha thought he was. It was some side effect of his bloodline, Orochimaru-sama had told him, that let him build up tolerances for foreign substances such as poison at an abnormal rate, and his tolerance for sedatives had been growing before his capture. Still, he had not yet recovered entirely from the fight against Konoha's ANBU and the Sannin Jiraiya, nor had he determined how he could best serve Orochimaru-sama in his current situation; better for him to remain in the hospital bed, letting the Konoha interrogators wear themselves out, while he considered his options.
He paid no particular attention to the passing of time, but tracked the changing of his guards by their chakra signatures, which they didn't attempt to hide. When the guard inside his room moved to the door directly after another futile attempt at interrogation, he began to pull himself out of his contemplation; when a new person with an unfamiliar chakra signature entered and took a seat, his guard went up. Had his questioners gotten frustrated and brought in someone new? But the new person didn't touch him, didn't come near him, said nothing; he was about to dismiss them as simply a new guard or nurse when a soft voice said, "So it is you, after all - I wasn't completely sure, it's been some time."
Kimimaro turned his head and dredged his eyelids open enough to see a blurry outline seated next to the wall. A blurry outline with - he blinked and tried to focus - long, dark hair, and a round face that he had seen before, younger and softer... "You," he said. "Outside Mist."
"You remember me," the familiar stranger said, and they smiled. "I wasn't sure if you would - it was such a long time ago, and a very brief meeting. How strange it is for us to meet again here..."
Kimimaro let his eyes close and felt something through the haze of sedatives that might have been astonishment. He had often remembered that night - it had been his first night out of his cell, and the night that had led to the morning when he had met Orochimaru-sama; it would be far stranger if he didn't remember it - but he could not truthfully admit to ever thinking very much about the two people he had met on the way to Kirigakure. He had never expected he would see either of them again, least of all in the stronghold of Orochimaru-sama's enemies.
Several questions came to mind, but he asked only one. "How?"
"How did I end up here?"
"Yes," Kimimaro said, and forced his eyes open again to watch the stranger.
"Hmm..." They looked to the side, considering. "It's a complicated story, really, and you seem a bit tired. Maybe we can talk about it tomorrow, I don't want to be too troublesome."
An ache was beginning to build in Kimimaro's bones from keeping himself alert, but he ignored it and said, "Your name?"
"Oh, yes - we didn't introduce ourselves before, did we?" the stranger said. "I'm Haku - what's your name?"
He considered the risk of sharing his name, then discarded it; it would give away nothing, as he had no reputation outside of Sound. "Kimimaro."
"It's nice to meet you again, Kimimaro-kun," said Haku, smiling; as the smile blurred Kimimaro closed his eyes again, and found, to his great surprise, that he agreed.
---
When Haku visited again, Kimimaro thought that about a day had passed. The usual interrogators had come and gone, but their attempt to force information had been brief and halfhearted, barely an interrogation at all, and Haku had appeared soon after. So they thought to get information from him through a friendly approach? They would be quickly disappointed.
As Haku had come in, Kimimaro had heard one of the ANBU say, "Excuse us, miss," and so he decided that he wouldn't give Haku the opportunity to take the offensive; he gathered his strength while Haku sat, and said, "Are you a girl?"
"Ah, you heard the ANBU?" Haku said. "Hmm - no, I'm not technically a girl. But I don't care if people think I am one, and for some reason a lot of people seem to... Does it matter to you?"
That gave Kimimaro pause, but he said, "No."
"I'm glad to hear it," Haku said, and Kimimaro forced his eyes open to see a smile on Haku's face. "One of my best friends is a girl, after all."
In his mind, Kimimaro reluctantly conceded the first round to Haku, and waited for Haku to begin questioning him. But Haku didn't ask any questions. Instead the other boy was quiet for a few moments, and then he began to talk about his friends. He didn't tell the story that Kimimaro had asked for, of how Haku had come to Konoha; only trivial, everyday stories, of funny conversations and training mishaps and minor arguments. Boring stories, with no information of any interest that Kimimaro could bring back to Orochimaru, and yet Kimimaro made the effort to listen rather than let the words flow past him. There was something warm in Haku's voice when he spoke about his friends that kept his attention and reminded him a little of Juugo, although, of course, it would not lead Kimimaro to reveal any information about Sound or Orochimaru-sama. He would never be so susceptible to such simple emotional manipulation as that.
As he listened, an unfamiliar feeling began to creep along his nerves. At first he thought it might only be the sedatives wearing off faster than usual, but there was a heaviness to this sensation that didn't usually accompany the fading of the sedatives; keeping the motion slow and subtle, he tested the restraints on his left arm. They remained tight, but with his strength returning, there was just enough give that he could activate the seal and break free, if it became necessary.
That realization gave him a name for the unfamiliar feeling, and in the middle of Haku's story he said, "Foolish."
"Eh?"
"This is foolish," Kimimaro said. "If I were stronger -" He was already strong enough, but only he needed to know that. "- I could use you as a hostage. To get away." For some reason this had caused him to worry; whenever he decided to break free he doubted he would need Haku as a hostage, but he didn't like to think of Haku being so careless.
"Oh, I don't think so," said Haku, and his light voice cooled. "It's true I couldn't stop you, but I'm not a real citizen of Konoha - nobody would think twice about killing me to prevent you from escaping, besides my friends, and they're not here at the moment. I'm sorry if that ruins your escape plans, although -" He smiled, and the warmth returned to his voice. "- it's kind of you to be concerned for me."
Kimimaro shut his eyes, but he didn't deny his concern. Haku didn't resume his stories, and after a few moments of silence, he said, "Do you have any friends? They're probably worried about you by now..."
"Friends?"
"Someone important to you," Haku said. "I thought - well, I suppose I hadn't thought about you in a long time, before I saw you were here, but the first time we met, I thought you looked very lonely... Sometimes, when I was younger, I wondered if you had ever met anyone who would be important to you - I always hoped that you had."
Kimimaro considered this. He didn't associate with many shinobi in Sound beyond his direct subordinates, who were certainly not friends; he lived for Orochimaru-sama, and - well, there was Juugo, the boy whose blood Orochimaru-sama had used to create the cursed seal. Juugo was a gentle person when his blood didn't turn him into a berserker, but when it did only Kimimaro could keep him from hurting others, and so he had grown accustomed to accompanying Juugo in his spare time. Juugo could be good company while he was calm, and with slight amazement Kimimaro realized that he had in some way missed Juugo's quiet presence. Of course, Orochimaru-sama came first, always, since he was the one who had given meaning to Kimimaro's existence...
He hadn't answered Haku's question. "Yes," he said, "I have," his voice dry and scratchy.
"I'm really glad," said Haku, and the happiness in his voice did seem genuine. "Being a shinobi, or even just living in the shinobi countries - it's so easy never to have anyone, to lose your family and your friends and your purpose... It's hard to live that way; I'm glad you have someone."
Kimimaro's throat felt rough and sore, and he thought that he ought to go to sleep and let Haku talk or leave as he wished, but without planning to he asked, "What about the man you were with that night?"
A frozen silence; then Haku said softly, "He's dead now."
I'm sorry, Kimimaro meant to say, but he began to cough and the words drowned in bubbles of blood and drugs as he slipped out of awareness; he was never sure if he had managed to say them aloud.
---
Haku continued to visit Kimimaro every morning for the next few days, although he wasn't sure how useful his visits were in gathering information; he did most of the talking, still, with only occasional short observations or answers to innocuous questions from Kimimaro. He liked talking with Kimimaro anyway, but he did worry that he wasn't accomplishing what he had promised Ibiki.
When he had mentioned his concern to Ibiki after one conversation, the man had only shrugged. "Kid," he'd said, "you got his name out of him on the first day you talked to him, and that's more than we managed. It's a slow process, gathering intelligence like this - don't worry about the time and don't rush and get his guard up, you're doing fine."
Haku had nodded and agreed and smiled, and behind his smile he had continued to worry that he was spending too much time trying to become Kimimaro's friend and not enough trying to get information out of him. Even behind the smile, he didn't let himself think that perhaps he cared more about Kimimaro than about information.
They hadn't spoken about Zabuza again.
"Try to move your little finger without moving any of the others," Kabuto said, and Haku tried. The little finger on his outstretched right hand twitched feebly, and when he tried again, all of his fingers jerked up.
"Hm," said Kabuto.
Haku was beginning to dislike his afternoon examinations by the medics. The medics were always encouraging and cheerful as they poked at his right arm and asked him questions, but they had yet to give him any kind of firm answer as to when his arm would be healed. Kabuto was the most inscrutable of them all, although polite and likable otherwise; since Sasuke's outburst, Haku had begun paying more attention to him, but he hadn't yet been able to discover anything that would explain why Sasuke had thought Haku would recognize the medic from somewhere else.
Kabuto turned Haku's hand over and began to tap lightly on the pads of each one, causing them to twitch. "Good, good," he said, and Haku wished for the thousandth time that Sasuke had not been so stubbornly close-mouthed. Just one hint, one clue as to why Kabuto's voice should have a familiar ring...
"Ah, good," said Kabuto, and he released Haku's hand. "It looks like the nerves haven't been too badly damaged, although -" He smiled, but there was something pitying in it. "- I'm afraid that the damage to the muscles and tendons was quite severe all along your arm. Your right arm will certainly be usable for everyday tasks, but it's highly unlikely that you'll regain full functionality."
"Oh," Haku said.
"Please don't let it bother you too much," Kabuto said, still smiling. "After all, you work at - hm, Ichiraku Ramen, don't you? I don't think the damage will interfere with your job there at all. It would be a different story if you were a shinobi or trying to become one, but since you aren't..."
"No, I'm not," Haku agreed, and turned his head to look out the window. "Thank you for telling me."
"Well, I need to continue my rounds - I'll see you later, Haku-kun," Kabuto said. Haku continued to stare out the window as he listened to Kabuto stand up, fuss with his lab coat, and close the door, and even when he was sure Kabuto was truly gone he couldn't bring himself to move, as if any further movement would make the medic's words irrevocably true.
As if he were watching himself come to the realization from very far away, Haku thought that he hated Kabuto.
Immediately at this realization, the thought of staying in his room became unbearable. He got up from the chair he had been sitting in for the examination and left, with no clear idea of where he meant to go besides out of the room and away.
If his friends had been in Konoha, he thought he would have gone to them; as it was, he was not entirely surprised when he ended up facing the ANBU guards outside of Kimimaro's room. One of them wore a boar mask, the other a horse, and by hair and build Haku could tell they were not the pair that had been guarding Kimimaro earlier.
The horse-masked ANBU said, "Hey, don't you usually visit in the morning?"
"I do," Haku said, with his customary smile; he still felt as if he were watching himself act from a great distance, but he couldn't let that show, or anything that might make the ANBU suspicious. "I thought that it might be helpful if I visited the prisoner twice a day, since I don't stay very long."
Horse and boar exchanged looks, and the boar said, "I don't think it would be a problem, but we'll have to search you again since you left the room."
"Of course, I understand," said Haku, and quietly stood through the quick but thorough inspection the boar-masked ANBU made. Haku had never made the mistake of trying to visit Kimimaro armed - he did keep a few of his needles in his hospital room, in case of an emergency, but never carried them anywhere else in the hospital - and when the ANBU decided he was clean, they let him into Kimimaro's room.
Kimimaro appeared to be asleep as Haku entered, but after Haku had sat down, Kimimaro's eyes slid open a fraction in narrow crescents of light green. "You're back," he said. "Early."
"Yes," Haku said, "I hope you don't mind. I just wanted to talk with you again for a little bit... If you're too tired, I can go."
A brief silence, and then Kimimaro said, "It's fine," his eyes shutting again.
"Thank you."
Haku distantly considered his conversational options. He shouldn't begin with a serious story, which meant putting off the story of how he had ended up in Konoha for at least a few more minutes, or another day. Something light, maybe a little funny, that didn't give away any information... Perhaps one of Naruto-kun's stories about retrieving that noblewoman's cat who kept escaping. Yes, that would be a good start. Haku would tell that story first.
"I can't be a shinobi anymore," he said.
Oh. That wasn't what Haku had meant to say at all. He had meant to be light and cheerful and not bothered by Kabuto's words, by the poorly concealed condescension in Kabuto's voice, by Kabuto's false pity. He reached up with his left hand to push a strand of hair out of his face, and it trembled. Oh dear.
If only Kimimaro would say something. Anything, it didn't matter, so that Haku could apologize and change the subject to something else, but Kimimaro said nothing and Haku's treacherous mouth opened.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that," all right, that was acceptable. "But it's almost funny, somehow," and his voice cracked, oh no, that wasn't at all acceptable but he couldn't stop. "I thought that I didn't mind not being a shinobi. I had my friends, and I was working at a ramen shop, and I thought that I was happy... And then when it mattered, it turned out that I wanted to fight after all, that I wanted to protect my friends. It didn't go very well, but even so - I thought that when I got better, I'd start training seriously again and try to join the Konoha shinobi, so I could fight alongside my friends. But I can't," and he covered his eyes with his left hand and felt tears, cold and damp. "My arm won't heal right, so I can't be a ninja. It's funny, isn't it? Just when I realized what I wanted, it's taken away, and I'm useless... I couldn't protect Zabuza-san, and I can't help my friends - I'm just a worthless person again," his mouth twisting bitterly on the words. "If I could have just died with Zabuza-san -"
"Stop it," Kimimaro said, and a little shock ran through Haku. "You aren't worthless. Even if you can't fight."
Haku wiped his eyes and looked up.
Kimimaro had opened his eyes and turned his head to watch Haku, a slight frown on his face. "Do your friends care if you can fight?" he asked.
Haku sniffled, and after a moment's thought said, "No. No, I don't think so..."
"I don't care, either," said Kimimaro. "So it doesn't matter. If your friends still care about you, then you aren't worthless." He closed his eyes again.
Haku sniffled one more time, then wiped away the last of the tears on his cheeks. "I suppose you have a point," he said. "I - I hadn't thought of it in quite that way."
"You can always find a way to be useful." Kimimaro's voice was growing raspy, as Haku had noticed it often did when Kimimaro was getting tired, but he continued. "I can no longer become a vessel for Orochimaru-sama, but still - there are still ways for me to serve him... Neither of us are useless."
"You're right," Haku said, and his smile this time was unforced. "I'm sure that Orochimaru must think very highly of you - he's lucky to have someone so dedicated." He wished that he could reach over and take Kimimaro's hand, but of course physical contact with a prisoner was forbidden, and Kimimaro might not appreciate such a gesture, anyway.
He ought to be going; he stood up and said, "I should let you rest, but - thank you for listening, Kimimaro-kun. It was - it was very kind."
Kimimaro didn't answer immediately, and Haku was opening the door when he heard a faint, "I'm not kind."
"Pardon?"
"I'm not kind," said Kimimaro, his voice rough as it faded out. "My friend Juugo - it's what he told me. That's all. It's not because I'm kind."
"Ah," Haku said. "Then I'm glad we both have such good friends. I'll see you tomorrow, Kimimaro-kun," and he closed the door gently and left.
---
It was becoming clear to Kimimaro that he needed to escape.
He had not yet revealed any information that could compromise Sound or Orochimaru-sama, nor had Haku asked for any such information, but Kimimaro could feel his sympathy for Haku growing greater with each of their brief meetings; if he didn't leave Konoha soon, he would find it difficult to leave at all. He had already found himself trying to plan a route of escape that would involve the least damage to the ANBU guards and the civilians of Konoha, which shouldn't be a part of his calculations at all. Yes, it was past time for him to return to Orochimaru-sama; it was just the method and the proper moment that he needed to decide upon.
He was considering the possibilities when he heard the muffled conversation of the guards outside his door interrupted by a familiar voice. Reluctantly, he pulled himself out of his thoughts and waited, and a few minutes later, he heard the door open. "- sure it's okay?" one of the guards said, and the other one replied, "Yes, it's normal for interns to trade shifts, and Yakushi has clearance to treat prisoners."
"Sorry to disturb the routine," the familiar voice said. "It should only take a few minutes, unless you've noticed any changes in his condition..."
"No, go ahead. Bear will keep an eye on him for you."
"Thank you."
Kimimaro opened his eyes just enough to see Yakushi Kabuto standing over him, and a bear-masked ANBU hovering behind Kabuto's shoulder. He wasn't surprised. Orochimaru had told him that Kabuto would remain in Konoha if the attempt on the Kages were to fail, although Kimimaro hadn't considered the information of much use; he could escape with his own strength, and any attempted aid from Kabuto would only risk the spy being revealed, without benefit to Orochimaru.
In fact it was puzzling that Kabuto had taken the trouble to see Kimimaro at all, as it would be difficult for Kabuto to tell him anything with the ANBU keeping an eye on them both and the camera that Kimimaro had long ago spotted in one corner of the room, and Kimimaro kept his attention focused on Kabuto as the medic flipped through his chart. "Hmm, let's see -"
"No talking to the prisoner," the bear-masked ANBU said.
"Of course not, sorry," said Kabuto, as Kimimaro watched his hands subtly begin to form seals, hidden from the camera and the ANBU's view among the sheets of paper. "I was just talking out loud to myself, it's a bad habit of mine, I'm afraid," and a second Kabuto stepped out from behind him.
"I'll be as quick as possible," the first Kabuto said, and the second added, "Don't react, Kimimaro-kun, this is only a genjutsu."
Kimimaro didn't react; he let himself blink once, and listened as the first Kabuto checked his IV.
"Our master has gotten impatient," the second Kabuto said. "He wants you to return as soon as you can - though there's one little thing he'd like you to finish first."
The Kages, Kimimaro thought. Naturally, since Orochimaru-sama had been forced to leave the fight before striking the final blow, he wanted his most trusted servant to complete the task.
"This should keep him under control," said a Kabuto, and the other said, "I've switched out the medications, so you should be feeling more alert soon. I'll come back for you this evening and we'll take care of that last little errand, all right? I'll be returning with you, as Orochimaru-sama requires my skills."
Kimimaro continued not to answer.
"You can dispel the genjutsu now," Kabuto said, and a moment later, "I'm done - thanks for your patience."
Kimimaro shut his eyes, and his right hand twitched as he thought, Kai.
"Wait - did you see the prisoner move just now?" the ANBU guard said.
"Hm? No, sorry, I was updating the chart. Is there a problem?"
Kimimaro kept his eyes closed and lay still; after a moment the guard said, "I guess not. You can go now."
The door clicked shut, and Kimimaro heard the guard settle back into the chair. "Hmf - weird guy, no wonder he's still an intern," she said. "Too bad that pretty friend of yours isn't a medic, huh? I'd rather be looked after by someone cute like that than by a spacey intern who can't even pass the chuunin exams."
Trash. Kabuto was more than capable of handling an ANBU or five; Konoha would learn that soon enough. Kimimaro only had to wait, and he would be able to leave behind this soft, silly village and return to Orochimaru's side, to the place that he truly belonged.
Yet an unpleasant chill settled over him as he lay still and waited for evening to fall, and he could feel no eagerness at all.
---
Haku had asked Ibiki if it was all right for him to visit Kimimaro more frequently, and Ibiki had told him it was fine, visit whenever, as long as it didn't make the prisoner suspicious of Haku. Haku had thus started to make a habit of going to see Kimimaro twice a day, once in the morning, and then again either in the late afternoon or the early evening. It seemed to be effective; just yesterday Kimimaro had talked about the day he had met Orochimaru, without even being asked.
That story, told in a few simple sentences, weighed heavily on Haku's mind as he went for his evening visit with Kimimaro. To think that Kimimaro had met the snake Sannin so soon after running into Haku and Zabuza - it gave Haku a curious feeling of regret. If only he had spoken more to Kimimaro that night, if he had said something to Zabuza-san, then maybe... But no, that was a foolish idea. Zabuza-san wouldn't have wanted to pick up another stray child.
Occupied with his thoughts, Haku was almost at the door of Kimimaro's room when he realized that the two ANBU guards stationed outside the door hadn't challenged him yet; he paused to wait for them to notice his presence. Really, they should be more alert - he hadn't been trying to be stealthy at -
They weren't breathing.
Haku's left hand went instinctively to his hair, but the needles he usually concealed there had been left behind in his room. Of course. Damn.
He ought to leave at once and call for more ANBU, he wouldn't be of any use here injured and unarmed, but he took one silent step closer to the ANBU (killed as they stood, better to bring all the information he could with him) and the hall's cold light glinted along the thin silver handles of the scalpels in their throats.
Panic slammed into Haku, and he forced himself to swallow, to be still and let the fear wash over him and pass. He almost reached for one of the scalpels, just to have a weapon, but pulled his hand back in time - it would look too suspicious if he took one. He grasped the door's handle instead and eased it open without a sound. Just a crack, just wide enough to see the third guard slumped in the chair and the edge of a dark cloak, to hear "- have to be quick, Kimimaro-kun" in a light voice -
- "Oh dear, I was only aiming for your arm -" as the world went dark -
- "There was someone else - a man in a cloak" -
- "Don't you know him? Don't you remember?" -
Haku did now. Too late. I'm sorry, Sasuke-kun, you were right... He breathed in, crouched, opened the door a little wider, and slipped inside.
The Akatsuki puppet had his back to Haku; Kimimaro sat on the edge of the bed, his head turned toward the puppet (Kabuto) and the door. Haku froze, as if perfect stillness could somehow hide him, but Kimimaro's cool green eyes passed over him without blinking.
"They're in separate rooms, of course," Kabuto said, "which means we'll have to split up - I have clearance to treat the Kazekage, so I'll handle him. You can take this cloak and one of the ANBU masks and take care of the Hokage, and we'll meet up at the wall after we're both done."
He should have brought his needles. He should have taken one of the scalpels out of the guards. He had a useless, aching arm and no weapons and the man who had killed Zabuza-san was standing right in front of him, talking about killing the person who had allowed Haku to stay in Konoha with Sakura and Sasuke and Naruto. Haku had never considered himself to be reckless, but it was all he could do not to throw himself directly at Kabuto and go for his throat.
Instead he began to make seals with his good hand, preparing the subtlest genjutsu he knew. If Kimimaro didn't give him away, if Kabuto didn't sense him, he could get away when they left and alert someone in time to protect the Kages...
"It's a pity, though," said Kabuto. "I was so relieved to learn that you -"
Haku moved, and a scalpel sliced through only a few strands of his hair and not his eye.
"- had survived," Kabuto finished; he had turned when he'd thrown the scalpel and shifted position as Haku dodged, and now he was in front of the door and Haku would have to fight to get past him.
"You have such an intriguing ability," Kabuto said. "My master would have been so pleased to have a chance to study it - but we can't afford to carry dead weight along. We'll have to make a quick exit, after all." Under the cloak's hood, Haku could see a smirk.
Haku kept his back to the wall as he stood. He'd never escape, but if he could slow Kabuto down long enough for someone to realize something was wrong... "I won't let you get out of here so easily," he said.
Kabuto gave a small, polite laugh. "Do you think you can stop both of us in your condition?" he said, though Kimimaro had yet to make a move. "Don't forget, I'm one of your medics. I know exactly what you can't do - just give up and die quietly, like a good child."
"Ah, that's true," Haku said, and he smiled. "But I think you must not have watched me fight very closely, Kabuto-san, or you would have remembered what I can do..."
Kabuto struck, but Haku was gone, and the doorway filled with bars of ice.
"And you forgot," Haku whispered into Kabuto's ear, and Kabuto turned and found nothing there. "I wasn't a good child at all."
Ice spiraled up from under Kabuto's feet and he jumped just in time, only to find that the ice had disappeared. He was still in the air when it spiked up again right in front of his nose, but Kabuto wasn't as unnerved by the move as Haku had hoped; he used the spike to launch himself back at the doorway instead, and his momentum was enough to crash through the icy bars.
Haku had hidden himself against the wall in a genjutsu, but it wouldn't be strong enough to hide him for long, and he couldn't produce enough ice to keep up the fight for much longer. He let the genjutsu drop and ran for the door (Kimimaro-kun, please forgive me, please don't stop me) and Kabuto's hand smashed into his stomach and sent him flying back. He couldn't catch himself and sprawled on the floor, trying to catch his breath as agony twisted through his right arm; then Kabuto was on top of him, pinning him down with a knee on his chest, and blue chakra edged Kabuto's right hand.
"You're quick, Haku-kun," said Kabuto; his hood had fallen back, and the light shone off his glasses. "But your timing is all wrong... I'm so sorry it has to end this way," and his hand came down.
It jarred against bone - but not one of Haku's.
"Kimimaro-kun? What are you doing?" Kabuto said, and Haku stared at the strange sword that was holding off Kabuto's hand. "We need to get rid of this little problem and -"
"Enough," Kimimaro said. "We're leaving now."
"But - the Kages," said Kabuto, sounding as confused as Haku felt. "We have to kill them - it's an order from Orochimaru-sama, you can't refuse."
"Your fight has been too much of a disturbance," Kimimaro said dispassionately. "There's no time. We're leaving." He twisted the boney sword up and forced Kabuto off Haku's chest; Haku scrambled back and sat up, poised to make seals if necessary.
Kabuto glanced between Haku and Kimimaro, calculating. Then he smiled, stood up, and dusted off his cloak. "Just as you say," he said. "If you'll allow me, I'll clean up here and we can be -"
"If you try to harm Haku again, I'll bring only your head back to Orochimaru-sama," said Kimimaro.
Kabuto's smile fractured for an instant before it smoothed out. He said, "Of course. Let's hurry, then," and the two of them were gone.
Haku breathed in deeply, raggedly, with amazement that he was still breathing; then he leaped up, staggered briefly, and ran after them, his arm protesting with every step.
The hall outside was empty, but Haku heard shouting and crashing to his left and turned that way. Another hall along and there were ANBU and medics on the floor, groaning but alive, and spikes of bone along the walls, and a flash of white hair going around the corner - "Kimimaro-kun, wait! Please wait!'
There was no sign of Kabuto when Haku turned the corner, but Kimimaro spun in the midst of bone blades, knocking aside the ANBU and chuunin trying to stop him. Haku dodged between the bones as the last of the shinobi collapsed, clutching their knee; Kimimaro turned to go and Haku said "Wait, please," and reached for his hand, lacing his fingers with Kimimaro's. "Don't go - you don't have to go back to Orochimaru, you can stay here. I'll vouch for you, it'll be fine. You can meet my friends when they come home, I know they'll like you, even Sasuke - please, stay here, you don't have to leave..."
For a moment Kimimaro's fingers tightened around Haku's, his skin burning hot as if with a fever. "I'm glad that I could meet you again," he said, and smiled for the first time that Haku could remember, small and sweet. "Take care, Haku."
Yelling echoed from further down the hall, and Kimimaro's hand slipped from Haku's and he was gone.
Haku took a single step after him; his legs shook and he had to stop, leaning against one of the bone spikes that Kimimaro had left behind. He was still leaning on it when a single ANBU in a crow mask came running down the hall. "Did you see anyone suspicious pass this way?" he asked.
"Yes," Haku said, "but I'm not sure which way he went - it was a few minutes ago..."
The ANBU glanced briefly across the hallway and the incapacitated shinobi, and through the mask's eyeholes Haku could see red eyes, the pupils surrounded by three black tomoe. Sharingan, but more advanced than Sasuke's... "Excuse me," Haku said, "but - are you Sasuke's brother?" All Haku knew about Sasuke's brother he had learned from Naruto's attempts to explain why Sasuke never talked about him, which, in the way of Naruto's explanations, had eventually come down to, "Uh, it's just kind of complicated?"; Haku had been curious about him ever since, but now that he was in front of Haku, Haku could only think of trying to distract him for a few moments.
The ANBU's eyes focused on him, and Haku crushed the instinct to flee. "Yes, I'm Itachi," the ANBU said. "You're one of Sasuke's friends - Haku? He's mentioned you a few times."
"Ah, yes, that's me..."
"It's good to meet you - I'm sorry that we haven't been able to meet before."
"Oh, no, I understand, I'm sure you must be very busy in ANBU," Haku said, smiling. "I'm glad that we could meet now - perhaps once Sasuke is back, we could all talk again together?"
"Yes, that sounds like a good idea," said Itachi. "Please excuse me for now, Haku-kun, I'm afraid I have to work."
"Of course, don't let me keep you - I should go back to my room, I think."
Itachi bowed slightly and vanished; after a few moments, Haku let his smile fade, and began to try and work out the quickest way to his hospital room.
---
Ibiki collared Haku as he was returning to the room and took him directly for questioning about Kimimaro's escape. Haku gave as many details as he could, but it still took a long time; Ibiki wasn't satisfied until finally someone came in and told him that there had been no casualties other than the three ANBU guarding Kimimaro, and that Kimimaro and Kabuto had successfully escaped. Only then would he allow Haku to go, with a grudging injunction to "get some rest, we'll need to talk to you again tomorrow."
It was already tomorrow, in a technical sense, but Haku was grateful for a break. The hospital was still busy getting itself back into order, and it was easy enough for him to slip out rather than return to his room; he'd had enough of the hospital, for now.
When he opened the door to Naruto's apartment, it was dark, of course, though a little bit of the predawn light seeped through a window. He went in, slipping off his sandals. The faint scent of old ramen hung in the air, as it always did; no matter how much Haku aired the apartment out, the smell never seemed to go away, but for once it made Haku smile rather than irritating him. The smell of ramen and the scattered mess Haku could see in the rest of the apartment were both comfortingly familiar. All the scene needed was for Naruto to come crashing in, shouting about his latest mission...
But there was no Naruto, banging about in the kitchen and bragging. No Sakura, scolding Naruto to eat better and trying to hide her laughter at his stories. No Sasuke, making harsh remarks even as he helped sort out Naruto's attempts to cook.
Haku crouched down, heedless of the open door, and wrapped his arms around himself as best he could. "Please come home soon," he whispered. "Please hurry and come home..."
And please make it back safely, Kimimaro-kun.
Naruto, characters, etc. © Kishimoto WHO GAVE ME HEAVEN AND THEN COCKBLOCKED IT WITH KABUTO BACKSTORY GODDAMNIT NO ONE CARES