(no subject)
Can't believe it took me til recently to actually realize it wouldn't have worked even if we tried a year ago. Damn, I was jaded. For the longest time I thought that it was something about me. I definitely wasn't worth giving up, but the funny thing is you weren't worth keeping. I know that I will always care because that's who I am, I care about people. It takes a lot for me to completely shut you out even if you treat me like crap. There comes a time when you realize when people aren't worth caring about anymore, they are just that far gone. There was a point where I had to stop caring about Joey, and a point where I shouldn't go out of my way to be nice to him anymore. You are almost at that point. I've tried being a friend, but who wants a one-sided friendship with their ex? Why would I only want to talk to you when you need me? and at the slightest sign of my own insecurities you stop talking to me until the next moment you feel insecure. I am not, and will never be your vanity mirror. You can not just think, " Oh Angela's a great person/friend, she will be there for me whenever I need her" ... it's because I would always be there that I should be more important to you. Funny how life is always backwards. I will always be the catch you let slip through your fingers and you'll have to live with that for the rest of your life, and I will find someone who actual deserves to be with me.