insomnia strikes again
so again i'm up at a ridiculous hour on a wednesday night...and i didn't even go out drinking. although i can safely say that this insomnia and my last bout a few weeks ago are not due to the same thing...thank god. i do want to say that i love my friends and i'm always glad to help them out....i hope that's what they remember when they think of me. hopefully i've become a more reliable person than i used to be. it used to be all about me and only doing what benefitted me in the long run. i mean i'm not saying i've lost my selfish nature completely but i hope people don't see that when they look at me. i do care about the people i'm close to and i hope they know that. i dunno i guess just the fact that my life could end abruptly at any moment puts things in a new perspective. we spend so much time holding back in our lives afraid of stepping on any toes and saying things we will regret. but sometimes things we're scared to say need to be said. people need to know how much they mean to one another. regardless of the way i've acted in the past, everyone in my life has affected me for the better in some way. i'm sorry if i never showed it. my friends really do mean the world to me....