Upset
Simple title for a simple problem: I'm upset at someone right now.
I decided NOT to post anything even hinting that I am upset on Facebook, in case I regret it later.
Here's a brief overview of today:
There's a guy at work who knows me more than anyone else there... which isn't saying much, but he still knows how I tick better than the others. But he insists on making fun of me, sending me crude jokes, flipping me off and cursing in front of me. All of these things make me uncomfortable to be in the presence of people who do that. So why would he sit with me at lunch and then do all those things? Simple answer: He thinks my reactions are funny. And sure, I understand that guy get a kick out of semi-tormenting each other. I don't know why they do it, but at least I understand that it's a generalized difference between men and women.
But he knows me well enough. I do not like it. I was so upset that I had to leave the lunch table. The trigger happened when someone else asked why I said something (which admittedly I hadn't thought through before I said). I felt stupid, and while I was vulnerable and embarrassed, my co-worker was rolling on his seat laughing at the way I was being treated. I got up to leave but before I left I am ashamed to say that I left a passing remark.
It wasn't with malice, but more as an explanation. Went something like this:
"It's okay, I'm not leaving because of the comment. It's just that... [co-worker's name]... I sometimes can only handle you in small amounts. I mean, we're fine when one-on-one, but not so much in groups."
Ugh. I should have not said anything and waited later to pull him aside and talk to him in private. I mean, who wants to be chastised in public? Talk about a stupid move, Sarah. *facepalm*
Well he instantly sobered up and said something along the lines of "I can only handle you in small amounts too."
Really? Do I ever make fun of you or things you stand for? The answer (to my knowledge) is no! So what the heck? Why don't I get the courteousy back in kind that I give to you?
Okay, so it was really REALLY unwise for me to call him out in public. I was extremely upset, even though I had on an embarrassed smile. I should never do or say anything while upset - I know that. Stupid stupid stupid!
I decided NOT to post anything even hinting that I am upset on Facebook, in case I regret it later.
Here's a brief overview of today:
There's a guy at work who knows me more than anyone else there... which isn't saying much, but he still knows how I tick better than the others. But he insists on making fun of me, sending me crude jokes, flipping me off and cursing in front of me. All of these things make me uncomfortable to be in the presence of people who do that. So why would he sit with me at lunch and then do all those things? Simple answer: He thinks my reactions are funny. And sure, I understand that guy get a kick out of semi-tormenting each other. I don't know why they do it, but at least I understand that it's a generalized difference between men and women.
But he knows me well enough. I do not like it. I was so upset that I had to leave the lunch table. The trigger happened when someone else asked why I said something (which admittedly I hadn't thought through before I said). I felt stupid, and while I was vulnerable and embarrassed, my co-worker was rolling on his seat laughing at the way I was being treated. I got up to leave but before I left I am ashamed to say that I left a passing remark.
It wasn't with malice, but more as an explanation. Went something like this:
"It's okay, I'm not leaving because of the comment. It's just that... [co-worker's name]... I sometimes can only handle you in small amounts. I mean, we're fine when one-on-one, but not so much in groups."
Ugh. I should have not said anything and waited later to pull him aside and talk to him in private. I mean, who wants to be chastised in public? Talk about a stupid move, Sarah. *facepalm*
Well he instantly sobered up and said something along the lines of "I can only handle you in small amounts too."
Really? Do I ever make fun of you or things you stand for? The answer (to my knowledge) is no! So what the heck? Why don't I get the courteousy back in kind that I give to you?
Okay, so it was really REALLY unwise for me to call him out in public. I was extremely upset, even though I had on an embarrassed smile. I should never do or say anything while upset - I know that. Stupid stupid stupid!