The Day Before - Reflections
I thought that tomorrow I would start my spiritual journey, but I was wrong. I realize now that I've been starting it all week by thinking about this, meditating on it, and growing excited to begin this. Yesterday was the last day that I put product in my hair. Perhaps the last time if I keep these dreads for life. I can see myself as an old woman with gray and white hair in dreadlocks. Honestly though, I don't know if I'll keep them that long. It depends on where this journey takes me. Anyway, I put product in my hair and curled it. I needed to do it one last time since I love the way my hair holds a curl. I then took pictures (of course Griffin had to be in on them) of my hair. I didn't think to take a behind picture, but oh well.
I intended to take a shower last night, but Dann and I were catching up on Once Upon a Time. Then I felt sleepy and needed to go to bed. I think, subconsciously, I didn't want to wash them out yet. I wasn't ready. Today my hair was still in curls. I went to take a shower. I had my new shampoo to strip my hair of product and leave it natural. I turned on the shower and undressed to get in. I glanced at myself in the mirror and saw the curls there. And then it hit me. Tomorrow I would be dreading my hair. Tomorrow I would be starting this journey. I stood there, staring in the mirror, touching my curls, allowing them to loop around my finger as my mind slowly wrapped around what this meant. When I stepped in the shower I would be washing myself of the previous journey I'd been on. I would be starting new, starting clean, starting fresh. I would be free of "getting better" and I would be starting to be organic to myself. After a time, I finally stepped in the shower. I let the water run over my hair and I touched the hair as the curls fell out. I washed my face and then, taking a breath, I pumped the shampoo into my hand and starting washing my hair. I scrubbed at it, making sure to cover every single hair. Finally, I washed it out. My hair felt course. I had no conditioner in it. I finished washing and turned the shower off. I squeezed the water out of my hair. I felt clean. I know that sounds silly since I just showered, but I felt like my soul had been cleaned. My head tingled and I felt like it was breathing. And in that moment I knew that this journey had begun.
Tomorrow I'll take a step of representation of this journey by putting dreadlocks in. It's going to be a 2 day affair. And when I come home on Sunday I plan on shutting myself away for awhile and doing some reflection on my soul and some journaling of the weekend experience. Whatever I do, I know that this weekend will be emotional and exciting. And also fun. I plan on letting lose with Katie and Sarah, letting my soul be free. I'm excited. Katie picks me up at 10am tomorrow. I'm going to take another shower tonight to ensure that all product is out of my hair. Today, life felt wonderful. I love this new icon because it's such a reflection of how I feel inside, how I know I will feel on this journey. Some days won't be wonderful. Some days won't be freeing. Some days will be hard. But that's all part of the journey. And it's the journey I'm looking forward to.
So, here's a few pictures of Griff and I from yesterday. We did photobooth on my mac so it's kind of a photo dump on here with far more photos than you probably want to see, but they were amusing and I thought I'd share.
I intended to take a shower last night, but Dann and I were catching up on Once Upon a Time. Then I felt sleepy and needed to go to bed. I think, subconsciously, I didn't want to wash them out yet. I wasn't ready. Today my hair was still in curls. I went to take a shower. I had my new shampoo to strip my hair of product and leave it natural. I turned on the shower and undressed to get in. I glanced at myself in the mirror and saw the curls there. And then it hit me. Tomorrow I would be dreading my hair. Tomorrow I would be starting this journey. I stood there, staring in the mirror, touching my curls, allowing them to loop around my finger as my mind slowly wrapped around what this meant. When I stepped in the shower I would be washing myself of the previous journey I'd been on. I would be starting new, starting clean, starting fresh. I would be free of "getting better" and I would be starting to be organic to myself. After a time, I finally stepped in the shower. I let the water run over my hair and I touched the hair as the curls fell out. I washed my face and then, taking a breath, I pumped the shampoo into my hand and starting washing my hair. I scrubbed at it, making sure to cover every single hair. Finally, I washed it out. My hair felt course. I had no conditioner in it. I finished washing and turned the shower off. I squeezed the water out of my hair. I felt clean. I know that sounds silly since I just showered, but I felt like my soul had been cleaned. My head tingled and I felt like it was breathing. And in that moment I knew that this journey had begun.
Tomorrow I'll take a step of representation of this journey by putting dreadlocks in. It's going to be a 2 day affair. And when I come home on Sunday I plan on shutting myself away for awhile and doing some reflection on my soul and some journaling of the weekend experience. Whatever I do, I know that this weekend will be emotional and exciting. And also fun. I plan on letting lose with Katie and Sarah, letting my soul be free. I'm excited. Katie picks me up at 10am tomorrow. I'm going to take another shower tonight to ensure that all product is out of my hair. Today, life felt wonderful. I love this new icon because it's such a reflection of how I feel inside, how I know I will feel on this journey. Some days won't be wonderful. Some days won't be freeing. Some days will be hard. But that's all part of the journey. And it's the journey I'm looking forward to.
So, here's a few pictures of Griff and I from yesterday. We did photobooth on my mac so it's kind of a photo dump on here with far more photos than you probably want to see, but they were amusing and I thought I'd share.