That Which Doesn't Kill You.....
Hurts Like Hell.
I've made little secret about my distaste for our Pastor. However, in the past few years, my church has become a literal sanctuary for my hurting heart and confused mind. I have struggled through a number of personal crises, and found peace and solace there. I have put forward service, as an Elder, a choir member and a Sunday School student. Now, the war is at home.
Two weeks ago, there was supposed to be a meeting. A discussion regarding the choir changing locations from the choir loft to the front of the sanctuary. This was met by loud voices and strong feelings. People reacted in a big way, and as such, Tammie took it upon herself to cancel the discussion before it could happen. What I know now is that this was a major violation of Robert's Rules of Order. What I knew then was that this was a violation of the trust we gave her as our leader, and a slap in the face to those of us who were willing to discuss the issue like adults. It was completely single minded and out of line. Was she the only one with blame? No. No one person ever is for things that happen. But this started a domino effect, including the resignation of the Vice-Chair of the Board of Elders (who, incidentally, is the also head of the Library Committee, a choir member, and a Sunday School teacher)and the Chair of the Board of Trustees (a choir member and member of many committees) and the Usher Coordinator. They felt personally violated by Tammie's decision, and in a way I suppose they were.
Then came the letter. Tammie accepted a call in Maine and will be leaving her leadership role in our church in October. This leaves us with the need for a call and no leadership on the Boards. This is a problem.
This is a big fight, and a long-running one. People are choosing sides and it is tearing our church apart. I am concerned about going forward. I want to throw my hands up and say screw it. What is the point? But I know that I have to be stronger than that. I have prayed constantly for direction. I just keep saying..."Lead me. I'm here, I'm listening. I'm scared, but I'm ready. I want to move forward, and only You can show me the way."
Lead me. I'm listening.
I've made little secret about my distaste for our Pastor. However, in the past few years, my church has become a literal sanctuary for my hurting heart and confused mind. I have struggled through a number of personal crises, and found peace and solace there. I have put forward service, as an Elder, a choir member and a Sunday School student. Now, the war is at home.
Two weeks ago, there was supposed to be a meeting. A discussion regarding the choir changing locations from the choir loft to the front of the sanctuary. This was met by loud voices and strong feelings. People reacted in a big way, and as such, Tammie took it upon herself to cancel the discussion before it could happen. What I know now is that this was a major violation of Robert's Rules of Order. What I knew then was that this was a violation of the trust we gave her as our leader, and a slap in the face to those of us who were willing to discuss the issue like adults. It was completely single minded and out of line. Was she the only one with blame? No. No one person ever is for things that happen. But this started a domino effect, including the resignation of the Vice-Chair of the Board of Elders (who, incidentally, is the also head of the Library Committee, a choir member, and a Sunday School teacher)and the Chair of the Board of Trustees (a choir member and member of many committees) and the Usher Coordinator. They felt personally violated by Tammie's decision, and in a way I suppose they were.
Then came the letter. Tammie accepted a call in Maine and will be leaving her leadership role in our church in October. This leaves us with the need for a call and no leadership on the Boards. This is a problem.
This is a big fight, and a long-running one. People are choosing sides and it is tearing our church apart. I am concerned about going forward. I want to throw my hands up and say screw it. What is the point? But I know that I have to be stronger than that. I have prayed constantly for direction. I just keep saying..."Lead me. I'm here, I'm listening. I'm scared, but I'm ready. I want to move forward, and only You can show me the way."
Lead me. I'm listening.