No More, Please!
Before I rant, I will acknowledge the fact that this baby will come when she's ready. I understand and accept that, but I still have a right to be unhappy about it!
I'm 38 weeks 6 days today and I don't know how I will go another two or three weeks if that is what is destined for me! My feet are so swollen, my pubic bone feels like it's broken, and I've gained 4 lbs in the last week due to water retention! 4lbs! That's crazy.
My doctor isn't really for cervical checks, but considering how I am feeling and the weight gain, he checked me yesterday. My cervix is still completely closed, locked up like a chastity belt. I know it doesn't mean anything in the scheme of all this, but I have to say I am quite disappointed in that. I feel like there's no hope for me and I'll be pregnant for the rest of my life!
I feel myself starting to get depressed, and I try to reassure myself that it still could happen before my due date, or shortly thereafter, and I will be fine. It's just... rough! I thought for sure she would be 'early' as the calculations for my due date aren't even possible and my family has a history of delivering early, even with their first.
I think if I'd had any signs of progress so far- lost mucous plug, contractions, anything, I'd feel more comfortable about these last couple weeks. But, nothing! I've had more BH contractions, but thats it, and there's been a bit of cramping, but never accompanied with real contractions.
I know this isn't getting me any where so I'll stop my whining, I just needed to vent a little to people who understand. I'm really not that selfish of a person. Like I said, I'm up for giving her the time she needs, I just find myself getting depressed over it and with a history of depression, it scares me for whats to come!
I'm 38 weeks 6 days today and I don't know how I will go another two or three weeks if that is what is destined for me! My feet are so swollen, my pubic bone feels like it's broken, and I've gained 4 lbs in the last week due to water retention! 4lbs! That's crazy.
My doctor isn't really for cervical checks, but considering how I am feeling and the weight gain, he checked me yesterday. My cervix is still completely closed, locked up like a chastity belt. I know it doesn't mean anything in the scheme of all this, but I have to say I am quite disappointed in that. I feel like there's no hope for me and I'll be pregnant for the rest of my life!
I feel myself starting to get depressed, and I try to reassure myself that it still could happen before my due date, or shortly thereafter, and I will be fine. It's just... rough! I thought for sure she would be 'early' as the calculations for my due date aren't even possible and my family has a history of delivering early, even with their first.
I think if I'd had any signs of progress so far- lost mucous plug, contractions, anything, I'd feel more comfortable about these last couple weeks. But, nothing! I've had more BH contractions, but thats it, and there's been a bit of cramping, but never accompanied with real contractions.
I know this isn't getting me any where so I'll stop my whining, I just needed to vent a little to people who understand. I'm really not that selfish of a person. Like I said, I'm up for giving her the time she needs, I just find myself getting depressed over it and with a history of depression, it scares me for whats to come!