huh?
so much shit has been going on lately....i have been stressed about everything....i keep thinking about everything that is going on right now...i mean i have one thing going good, one thing is alright for me... i love that john will bring me potstickers because i just break down crying after work...i love him...but why do these dumb bitches have to try and take him away from me....DONT!!!! he is the only that is perfect right now, its like the only thing that wont go wrong for me....and i dont know what to do? just everything...school? family? life? what am i doing here? can i make it through? right now everything is so shady and just dont think i can deal sometimes!!!! i wish i could tell him that this isnt the first time i erased my hand....the first time was because i wanted to see how bad it hurt but the second time was because i was smacked around by my step father.....he doesnt know that i have a history of hatred for my step dad....he doesnt understand that i erased for a third time because i felt worthless in the midst of being in love with him...that can happen.....you can be in love and have shit all around you going wrong right? right? i mean maybe i just watched too many movies where the person is in love and then nothing wrong could happen to them because of how they feel???? i hate hollywood because it doesnt depict my life....so self centered, but arent we all?