another ending and a beginning that’s pending
The past year or so I have felt so empty, void of meaning. So very detached and numb. I've pushed away some of my most dear and beloved friends. WHY? to make love stay. and we all know what Tom Robbins says about making love stay.
Thats why i did the things i did, every step that i took. We both knew it was coming though, the past couple of days...weeks even. i was trying to think of ways to end it, but you just had more courage to do it first. I can't dwell on this though, i have to take this for the opportunities it will present me to have the freedom i need to make sense of my life. I need to feel redeemed. I need to allow myself to find peace and happiness. I need to be happy with myself...alone before i can be happy with someone else. I said it to you best : "I've known what I had to do to change, for a long time, the recognition and acceptance of that fact has put one foot forward, but my back foot is stuck in tar"
Its up to me to get un-stuck.
breakups are so exhausting, but you still mean the world to me and i know that things are going to be just fine. Things are going to be okay now. This was the best choice we could have made.