Productive procrastinator
My stress level is through the roof right now. I'm trying to manage several difficult things (some of which I don't feel able to talk about for various reasons, some I'm just too burnt out to go into in detail) and I feel like everything is teetering on the edge of disaster. I've started to get a little bit of a handle on them, which is somewhat reassuring, but I'm not out of the woods yet.
What amused me is I've always been a productive procrastinator, so in the face of all the stuff I needed to manage that was stressing me out, you know what I did? I found myself drawing designs for a fashion line. I mostly certainly will never have the time or wherewithal to make it. But it's been in my head, at least the ideas of it, for a long time. And it relaxed me to switch gears and be creative on something that wasn't such a struggle. I can't necessarily affect some of the things that are overwhelming me, and I didn't feel in the headspace do any writing, so I found myself doing something completely fresh to try and reset myself.
I actually kind of like what I came up with. I've always wanted to design a high-fashion collection with a distinctly post-apocalyptic aesthetic. I probably never will actually make it-- my sewing skills are probably not quite up to par, and what would I do with it even if I did? --but the ideas never stopped percolating. I drew six looks in a couple of hours. And they weren't bad! They'd need a LOT of editing, I think I combined some of the pieces wrong and some of the foundations are not as carefully chosen as they could be, but the bones I think are there.
I just wish I could draw better. I can see them so clearly in my mind, but I am not very good at expressing them on paper. I think I'd be able to better refine and clarify my ideas if I could visually represent them more accurately, given what a visual learner I am. Maybe I just need to keep drawing them until the practice improves them to the point where they're useful. Again, I doubt I'll ever actually do anything with them. But it was a really refreshing change of pace to try something from a different part of my brain that didn't have so many challenges attached to it.
What amused me is I've always been a productive procrastinator, so in the face of all the stuff I needed to manage that was stressing me out, you know what I did? I found myself drawing designs for a fashion line. I mostly certainly will never have the time or wherewithal to make it. But it's been in my head, at least the ideas of it, for a long time. And it relaxed me to switch gears and be creative on something that wasn't such a struggle. I can't necessarily affect some of the things that are overwhelming me, and I didn't feel in the headspace do any writing, so I found myself doing something completely fresh to try and reset myself.
I actually kind of like what I came up with. I've always wanted to design a high-fashion collection with a distinctly post-apocalyptic aesthetic. I probably never will actually make it-- my sewing skills are probably not quite up to par, and what would I do with it even if I did? --but the ideas never stopped percolating. I drew six looks in a couple of hours. And they weren't bad! They'd need a LOT of editing, I think I combined some of the pieces wrong and some of the foundations are not as carefully chosen as they could be, but the bones I think are there.
I just wish I could draw better. I can see them so clearly in my mind, but I am not very good at expressing them on paper. I think I'd be able to better refine and clarify my ideas if I could visually represent them more accurately, given what a visual learner I am. Maybe I just need to keep drawing them until the practice improves them to the point where they're useful. Again, I doubt I'll ever actually do anything with them. But it was a really refreshing change of pace to try something from a different part of my brain that didn't have so many challenges attached to it.