A BRAND NEW LIFE (Chapter 13)

[brassebouillon]

Summary : What if Ryan had entered the Cohen’s life when he was five years old?
Beta : As usual, I want to thank the awesome
anne35  for the incredible work she did on this fanfiction. Disclaimers : The characters and the universe were created and are still owned by Josh Schwartz. (*glare*)
All mistakes are my personal property.
No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

PART 13

Ryan awoke cold and shivering. Ever since being diagnosed with the mumps, Ryan had been plagued by a constant fever. One moment he would be literally dripping with sweat and the next would leave him shaking with chills.
But Ryan felt different this time. There was something not quite right. This didn’t feel like all the other times he had woken up with damp pajamas. He pushed himself up onto his elbows and looked down, discovering much to his horror and shame, that he had wet the bed.
What were Sandy and Kirsten going to do? He had finally let himself believe they wouldn’t hurt him, but he had never wet the bed before either. They might not hit him, but they were bound to be really mad when they found out what he had done.

He didn’t have any other choice. He had to get rid of the evidence. If he could wash and dry the sheets before morning, no one would ever have to know. His mom had worked at a laundromat for a short time, and sometimes she would take him to work with her. It didn’t look hard. All he had to do was shove his sheets and his pajamas in the machine, pour in the soap, and push some buttons. He could do it. No problem.
He swung his legs over the side of the bed, trying to ignore his dizziness. He barely managed to stand up before everything went black.
Kirsten woke up with a start.
“Sandy, did you hear that?”
He sat up and scratched his head.
“Yeah, of course. When’s the last time you checked on Ryan?”
“About two hours ago.”
“Come on. Let’s go.”
They hurried upstairs to Ryan’s room and found him sprawled on the floor beside his bed.
“Must have been another nightmare,” Sandy whispered to Kirsten, while standing over Ryan.
The fever that was making him so physically sick was also playing havoc on Ryan emotionally. The nightmares that had been getting fewer and fewer had come back with a vengeance. Sandy leaned over to pick him up and put him back in bed.
He had barely begun to lift him when Ryan stirred. He opened his eyes and at the sight of Sandy, he pushed himself away and back onto the floor.
“No, don’t,” he pleaded. “Don’t touch me, please.”
Sandy sighed and sat on the floor next to him.
“Kid, it’s okay. Kirsten and I would never hurt you. We don’t care that you had a bad dream and fell out of bed. Let’s just get you back to sleep.”
“No, you don’t understand.”
“What don’t we understand, sweetie?” Kirsten sat on the other side of Ryan.
“I can’t tell you. You’ll think I’m a baby and get mad at me. “
Kirsten slowly reached out and pushed his bangs out of eyes, wincing at the heat that radiated off his forehead.
“No one is going to think you’re a baby and no one will get mad at you. You can trust us. Remember?”
Ryan looked at Kirsten, and even in the darkness of the room, he could see the concern in her eyes.
“I...I wet the bed. I’m sorry. I was going to clean it up, honest. But I got so dizzy that I fell down. Please don’t be mad. I won’t do it again. I promise.” His words came out fast and frantic, while tears streamed down his cheeks.
“Oh, sweetie., don’t worry about that. It’s okay.”
“But my sheets...”
“The sheets can be washed. I was going to change them in the morning anyway. I’ll just do it now instead.”
Ryan looked at Sandy and Kirsten, still not quite believing that things could be so simple with this family.
“Are you disappointed in me?”
“No, kid. You’re really sick and it was just an accident.”
“I’m sorry I woke you up,” he said quietly, still feeling the need to apologize for being a burden to them.
Kirsten smiled softly.
“I was going to get up soon to check on you.” She checked the piece of paper on his night stand. “Let’s see, last time I gave you Tylenol, so it’s time for some Motrin.”
She poured the liquid medicine into the small plastic cup and handed it to Ryan.
“Here you go. This will help that nasty fever.” She looked at him for a moment before continuing. “You know, I could draw you a bath.”
“But it’s the middle of the night.”
“I know, sweetie, but a bath would make you feel better and it would help lower that fever of yours.”
Ryan dropped his head. “Okay, I’ll do whatever you want.”
“Kid, taking a bath isn’t a punishment for wetting the bed. If you don’t want to take a bath you don’t have to. Kirsten just wants you to feel better. You know that, don’t you?”
“I know. I’ll take a bath if it’ll help. Besides I feel kind of yucky.”
Kirsten rose and took Ryan by the hand. She stopped and grabbed a clean pair of pajamas from Ryan’s dresser and fresh set of sheets. She handed the sheets to Sandy, who had already begun stripping the bed. Once in the bathroom, Kirsten started the water and checked the temperature, before starting to help Ryan undress. When she saw him stiffen, she realized that this was the first time she had helped him take a bath. From the first day he arrived, he always insisted that he could do it himself. She really hadn’t thought much about it. A few months earlier, Seth had told her the same thing.
The first few times Seth had bathed by himself, Kirsten had to march him back into the bathroom and scrub his face and neck. But not Ryan. He came out spotless. It quickly became routine that when it was bath time for the boys, Kirsten stayed within earshot of one child, while Sandy did the same for other.
Kirsten quickly glanced around the room, hoping for idea to help put Ryan at ease. It was then she noticed one startling difference between her two boys’ bathroom. Seth’s was littered with toys. So many in fact that she often wondered how he managed to sit down in the tub. But there was not one single toy in Ryan’s bathroom. She made a mental note to correct oversight the very next day.
“Is something wrong?” Ryan asked.
“Yes and no. It’s too late to play with them, but I couldn’t help noticing that you don’t have any bath toys.”
“Bath toys?”
“Yes. If you look in Seth’s tub, it’s filled with all sorts of figurines...batman, superman, and the man-spider.”
“Spiderman,” Ryan corrected as he climbed in the tub. “Kirsten, the water’s cold.”
She checked the temperature again.
“No it’s not, sweetie. I wanted the water to be close to the same temperature as the room. If it was hot, it wouldn’t help lower your fever.”
“Oh,” Ryan replied. “I’m sorry.”
“There’s nothing to be sorry about. Tell me more about this Spiderman character. Why would anyone like anything that has to do with spiders? I hate them. I don’t even get close enough to kill them. I make Sandy do it.”
Ryan grinned at her.
“That’s because you’re a girl. My mom didn’t like them either and neither did Theresa. But Spiderman isn’t a real spider. He’s a superhero with spider powers. He’s a good guy.”
“Really?” Kirsten pretended to sound skeptical. “Are you sure? I still don’t see how someone dressed up like a giant insect could be one of the good guys.”
She bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself from smiling, as Ryan went into a detailed explanation of all the wonderful things that Spiderman had done.
Twenty minutes later, they emerged from the bathroom to find Sandy waiting patiently for them at the foot of the bed. Ryan crawled into bed, and they both tucked the sheets around his shoulders.
“‘Night, kid,” Sandy said and ruffled the boy’s hair.
“Sweet dreams.” Kirsten leaned over and kissed him on the forehead, relieved to discover that the bath and the Motrin had helped lower his temperature.
He reached up and touched her hair.
“Kirsten?”
“Yes, honey.”
“I love you.”
Kirsten felt her eyes well up with tears. It was the first time Ryan said he loved her.
“I love you too, Ryan. Very, very, very much.”

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Kirsten started up the stairs carrying a tray of food for Ryan.
“I’m going to go check on Ryan. He’s been asleep most of the afternoon and it’s time for his medicine.”
She slowly opened his door and found him burrowed under his cover, fast asleep. She put down the tray and went to the window opening the blinds to let some the last bit of daylight into the room.
“Sweetie, it’s time to wake up,” she said and gently shook Ryan. “You need to eat something and take your medicine.”
Ryan moaned and rolled away from her.
“M’ tired,” he mumbled.
“I know, but you’ve got to eat something. You can’t take your medicine on an empty stomach. I’ve got Jell-O, applesauce, and juice. Which do you want first?”
He rolled over again, this time facing her. Kirsten was surprised to discover that he was crying.
“I can’t eat. It hurts to swallow.”
She leaned down and hugged him.
“I know it does, honey. I wish you didn’t have to go through this, but I can’t help it. You simply have to eat and drink something.”
“But it hurts,” he repeated.
“How about I go get an ice-pack from the fridge? That helps, doesn’t it?”
He reluctantly nodded.
“Okay then, first the ice-pack and then you try some of my famous Jell-O. Did you know I made this special for you? I had to boil water and everything. Seth says you can use it to patch the tires on your bike, but don’t you believe him. It’s delicious, my best yet.”
“I bet.” Ryan rolled his eyes and gave her a lopsided grin.
“Don’t you start on me too,” she teased, leaving the room.
Kirsten was just about to head back upstairs when Sandy entered the kitchen.
“I take it Ryan wouldn’t eat for you,” Sandy commented while nodding at the ice-pack in her hand.
“How’d you guess?” She leaned on the counter, dropped her head and sighed. “I’m just so tired. Between waking up to check on him all hours of the night and worrying about his fever, I just can’t take much more. I know his throat is sore and I realize that the fever is affecting his appetite, but I just want him to eat something...anything.”
Sandy stood behind her and started rubbing her shoulders. “I know you’re worried, but you can’t let yourself get sick taking care of him. Don’t forget, even Ryan at his healthiest is not a big eater. Why don’t you let me try?”
“Would you? I just need a couple of minutes to pull myself together. I don’t want Ryan to see me upset. He’d blame himself.”
Sandy stood outside Ryan’s room and forced himself to smile before entering.
“Hey there, sleepyhead. I’ve got that ice-pack for you.”
He leaned down and gently placed it on Ryan’s throat. Immediately, Ryan tried to push it away. Sandy held it there firmly.
“I know it’s cold, kid, but you’ll get used to it. It will help reduce the swelling in your throat and help you eat.”
“I don’t want anything.”
“You haven’t had anything to eat all day. I’m sorry, but you don’t have a choice.”
He looked at the tray that Kirsten had brought up earlier. “I see the problem. Kirsten wanted you to eat her Jell-O, didn’t she? I tell you what, kid. I love that woman, but how she can burn water is beyond me. How about I reheat some of Rosa’s chicken soup or maybe some strawberry yogurt?”
Ryan shook his head no.
“Okay, I’ll make a deal with you. I’ll let you have those blue ice-pops you like so well first and then you try some soup or yogurt. How does that sound?”
“No,” Ryan said stubbornly.
“Ryan,“ Sandy began much more sternly than he intended, “You’ve got to eat something if you ever want to get better.”
Ryan’s lower lip began to tremble and tears started to fall down his cheeks.
“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be so much trouble. Please, don’t be mad at me. I’ll do whatever you want, just don’t send me away.”
Sandy quickly glanced at the door, hoping that Kirsten did not hear Ryan. Luckily, she was nowhere to be seen and he returned his attention back to Ryan.
“I’m sorry, kid. I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m just worried about you. We’re all worried about you. Besides,” Sandy gave him a playful grin, “if anyone should be scared around here it’s me. I promised Kirsten that I’d get you to eat. If I fail, she might make me eat this Jell-O as punishment, and we can’t have that happening. Come on,” he nudged Ryan, “What do you say? Does that soup sound any better? Please, for the sake of my stomach.”
Ryan smiled up at him.
“Well, okay. Maybe a little bit.”
“That’s my boy. I’ll be back in a couple of minutes.”
He picked up the tray and headed out the door, almost bumping into Kirsten. She looked down at the untouched food, closed her eyes and sighed in disappointment.
“Don’t worry, honey,” Sandy reassured her. “Ryan says he’s hungry. He just wants soup instead. Don’t you, kid?” Sandy winked at him.
“That’s right, Kirsten. Sandy said you burnt the Jell-O.”
“Oh he did, did he?” Kirsten gave her husband one of her famous looks.
“Hey you!” Sandy teased Ryan. “We men are supposed to stick together. As soon as you’re better, I’m going to make sure she fixes you some of her oatmeal every morning for a week.”
“Get the soup Mr. Smarty-pants.” Kirsten shoved him out the door and turned to Ryan. “How about I read you a story while you wait for your dinner?”
Ryan nodded and Kirsten sat down on the corner of his bed with his favorite story. Sandy returned a few minutes later with the soup and some juice. They both stayed with him while he ate and drank almost everything in front of him. When he was done, they tucked him in and watched him quickly fall asleep. Kirsten couldn’t resist giving him one last kiss before heading back downstairs.
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Sandy took the thermometer out of Ryan’s mouth and grinned.
“100.5. That’s the lowest yet. How are you feeling, kid?”
Ryan thought for a moment before answering.
“Better...I guess.”
“Do you feel like eating something? asked Kirsten.
Ryan grimaced and shook his head. “I’m not hungry.”
Kirsten tried not to frown at him. It had been two days since Sandy had managed to get Ryan to eat and no amount of cajoling would change his mind. They had called Dr. Greene and he reassured them that as long as Ryan was drinking that they should be patient with him. However, they were given instructions to call Monday morning if Ryan was still refusing to eat.
“The swelling is going down. So, it’s not going to hurt like it used to.” Kirsten tried to explain. “I promise. Can’t you try just one bite, for me?”
“No.” Ryan buried his head in his dad’s wifebeater.
Kirsten sat down on the edge of his bed and stroked Ryan’s hair. She looked up at Sandy with tears in her eyes.
Sandy couldn’t take much more. He couldn’t stand to see his wife or his son like this. As much as he hated bribing kids, he decided it was their last hope.
“Ice cream,” he exclaimed.
Both Ryan and Kirsten looked at him in confusion.
“What?” Ryan asked.
“Ice cream,” he repeated. “Seth’s downstairs playing a new video game and I bet he’d like some company. Since your fever is better, I think we could let you out of bed to play a few rounds. You know how Seth likes to eat while playing. He seems to think that moving his thumbs that much works up an appetite. So while you boys play, you can both have some ice cream. Does that sound like a plan?”
Ryan’s face lit up and he nodded enthusiastically.
Seth looked just as excited to see Ryan.
“You’re up!” he exclaimed. “Cool. Do you feel good enough to play?” He waved the spare controller at Ryan. “It’s the new Mario Land.”
Kirsten watched as Ryan took his spot next to Seth on the couch. It was good to see her boys together again.
“The rules haven’t changed. We still have to save Summer...I mean the princess.” Seth restarted the game. “I’m so glad you’re up. I was getting bored without you. Even Captain Oats said that it wasn’t the same without you around. Although, I think he just wanted me to share my Summer stories with someone else.”
“Uh, Seth...fireball.” Ryan pointed at the screen.
“Crap!” He frantically pushed the buttons on the controller and jumped off the couch as if that would make Mario jump all the higher.
Kirsten set two bowls of ice cream in front of them.
“Thank you, Kirsten,”Ryan said and took a big spoonful.
“Yeah, thanks, Mom,” Seth repeated while trying to motion his mother to get out of the way of the television.
Sandy and Kirsten watched with smiles on their faces as the two boys continued playing video games and eating.
“That was a pretty good idea you had...letting the boys spend some time together. Between Seth’s rambling and the video game, Ryan has forgotten all about his throat still being a little sore.”
“Well,” Sandy said, puffing his chest out. “When you got it, you got it.”
“And I’ll tell you what I got...the last of the ice cream.”
Kirsten grabbed for the almost empty container and waved it at her husband.
“Hey, didn’t your father ever teach you to share?” He lunged for ice cream. “What am I saying?” He shook his head. “He probably went out and took over the nearest ice cream shop and let you be the manager.”
“I was going to give you a bite, but after that comment I don’t think you deserve it.” Kirsten laughed and tried to dodge Sandy’s latest attempt at grabbing the ice cream. He purposely missed the container and caught her around the waist instead.
“How about I take a bite out of you?” He asked while kissing her neck, causing Kirsten to giggle loudly.
The boys looked up and saw the playful exchange between their parents.
Seth rolled his eyes and said, “They are so weird sometimes.”
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Two hours later, Kirsten found Ryan curled up in a ball on the couch fast asleep. Leaning over to check his temperature, she was pleased to discover that though he was still warm to the touch, it appeared the worst of his fever was over. She gently laid a blanket on top of him. It was still well over an hour before he was due for another dose of medicine, and she thought it would be best if he stayed where he was and got some more rest.
She walked in the kitchen for a cup of coffee and stopped to peer over Seth’s shoulder. He was concentrating very hard on drawing an animated picture of himself.
“What have you been drawing, honey?”
He lifted up the paper and showed her his latest masterpiece.
“It’s me with super powers.”
“That’s very good, sweetie. I like the cape.” She pointed to the red cape flying behind the cartoon version of her son. It was emblazoned with a giant blue “S”.
“Thanks. I kept me the rest of me in my regular clothes. With or without superpowers, if a guy runs around in a pair of tights, he’s just asking for a fight. But I had to have the cape. It looks too cool when you’re flying not to.”
“I couldn’t agree more.” Kirsten took a sip of coffee to hide her grin. “So what is Super-Seth doing in your picture?”
“I’m flying to save Summer from the evil demon water polo players.”
“I didn’t know that they played water polo in elementary school.”
“They don’t, but you just know that some of the jerks like Luke Ward will play it when we get older.”
“Are you going to draw another picture saving Summer? Maybe getting a big kiss from her?” Kirsten couldn’t resist teasing Seth. He gave his mom a dirty look.
“Mom, I really like her, but don’t get gross.”
“Sorry.”
“There’s a problem with that anyway.”
“What’s that?”
“Summer really isn’t the saving type. I mean, come on, by the time Super-Seth got there, she probably would have already kicked the demon’s butt and had her nails done.”
“Well, maybe you could have Summer be a superhero too. From the way you talk, they all have at least one weakness. Maybe Super-Summer’s could be getting wet or at least getting wet enough to ruin her hairstyle.”
Seth grinned up at his mom.
“That’s a great idea, Mom. Who knew you had it in you? As soon as I get older I’m going to have my own graphic novel. If you keep up with ideas like that I may actually let you help me. You’ll be too old to work at the Newport Group by then anyway. You’ll probably need something to do to keep you busy.”
“Thank you, honey. That’s very kind of you.”
She glanced at the table and noticed another picture. It was of the four of them standing in front of the house. They were all smiling and holding hands.
“Did you draw this?”
“No, Ryan did. It’s pretty good. Not as good as me, of course, but he shows promise. I tried to get him to agree to becoming partners with me in the graphic novel business, but he doesn’t want to. He wants to draw houses when he grows up. Booooring.”
“You mean he wants to be an architect?”
“I guess. He’s been talking about it ever since you took him to your office that one time.”
Kirsten felt tears forming in her eyes. She didn’t even try to hold them back when she noticed on the back of the drawing, in small neat letter Ryan had written “To Kirsten, Love Ryan.”
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By Wednesday morning, Ryan was feeling much better. The swelling in his throat had gone down even more and his temperature was less than a degree above normal. Unfortunately for Kirsten that meant Ryan was still too sick to go to school, but not sick enough to refrain from the typical whining of a bored child.
“But Kiiiirsteeeen, I want to go to school. If I don’t go to school, I can’t go to soccer practice and if I don’t go to practice I can’t play on Saturday.”
“I’m sorry, Ryan, but the doctor said you should stay home for the remainder of this week. You can plan on going to school on Monday.”
“Monday? That’s forever. You don’t understand. The team needs me. Seth told me the coach talked to him at school yesterday. He said the team missed me and that he really hoped that I could play this Saturday. What if they lose because I’m not there?”
“There’s no I in teamwork, honey.”
“What?”
“I mean that there is a whole team of very good players. I know you’re one of the best, but one person does not make the team. What if you heard Luke Ward saying that the only way the team could win is if he showed up and played?”
“I’d want to punch him in the nose.”
Kirsten looked at him sternly. “But you wouldn’t right?”
Ryan rolled his eyes and looked down. “No.”
“Good. I’m glad to hear that.”
“But I still want to go to school. It’s boring here all day long without Seth around.”
“What am I, chopped liver?” She asked with her hands on her hips and a smile on her face.
Ryan knew she was teasing and grinned back at her.
“You’re not going to cook that for lunch, are you?”
“You’re spending too much time with Seth and Sandy. Any more comments like that and I might just start cooking all the meals around here.”
Kirsten loved that Ryan was feeling so comfortable. The mumps had been a horrible ordeal, but in a way, they had been another way to cement Ryan’s place in their home. Before his illness, he always tried to hide the smiles that came whenever the family good-naturally teased each other, but now he would occasionally join in on the fun. Even the whining was a mixed blessing. She certainly didn’t enjoy listening to it, but it meant that Ryan was finally acting like the almost six year old that he was. He no longer felt the need to be perfect under fear that he would be thrown out.
“I tell you what,” Kirsten said. “If you continue to get better, we’ll all go to the game on Saturday. You can’t play, but at least you’ll be there to support the team.”
“Humph,” Ryan snorted and crossed his arms over his chest.
“Okay. How about I read you a book?”
Ryan didn’t say anything.
“I’m going to take that as a yes. If I remember correctly, Seth brought home a book from the school library last week and never read it. You found it and started reading it the day it was due back.”
Ryan didn’t say anything, but Kirsten could tell she had gotten his attention.
“This is it, right?” She held up a copy of Jack and the Beanstalk that she’d been hiding behind her back.
Ryan’s face lit up when he saw the book. He was still amazed how this family paid attention to such little things. His own mom would never have even noticed that he was upset that he didn’t get to finish a book.
“Scoot over,” Kirsten said as she sat down on his bed. She stretched her legs out draped her left arm over Ryan’s shoulder. He snuggled in close to her and listened intently as she began reading. After a couple of pages Ryan interrupted the story.
“Kirsten,” he began.
“Yes, Ryan?”
“I still wish I could go to soccer practice, but this is almost as good.”
“Thank you, sweetie. That’s one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me,” she answered and kissed the top of his head and continued with the rest of the story.

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The next afternoon Sandy was working in his office when his cell phone rang. He didn’t recognize the number, and hesitated for a moment before answering.
“Sandy Cohen?” the voice on the other end asked.
“Yes.”
“This is Mark Greene, Ryan’s doctor. I’ve got some news about Ryan’s vaccinations. One of the main doctors who worked at the free clinic in Chino is currently in jail.”
“What for?”
“He falsified documents recording vaccinations. He would turn in that he had given the shots, but in reality he never had.”
“I’m afraid I don’t understand. What did he do with the vaccinations?”
“He would go into areas where illegal immigrants were prominent. He fed off their fear of being deported. He told them that since the clinic was owned and operated by the state, he would be obligated by law to turn them into the authorities if they ever showed up there. . Then he would lecture them about how much their children needed shots and how he could provide them right there in their very home...for a fee, of course. They were too scared to say no.”
“But what about the parents of the kids who should have gotten the vaccines in the first place? Most of these shots are given to infants. The parents had to know their children weren’t receiving them.”
“He paid them to keep their mouths shut. What’s really sickening is the amount he gave them. These people were willing to put their children’s lives at risk for a lousy twenty bucks. That’s how he eventually got caught. A single mother, who was an addict, moved to another city and asked her new doctor if he had the same arrangement with his patients.”
“And you believe that Ryan’s mother was one of these parents?”
“We can’t be sure. He was smart enough not to leave a paper trail. However, Ryan does fit into the time frame and from what little you’ve told me about his mother, she fits the profile of the other parents.”
“True, and the fact that Ryan developed the mumps even though his records show that he received the vaccination.”
“The only way we can be sure is if you talk to his mother. Maybe you can convince her that you are only doing for Ryan’s benefit and that you have no intentions of pressing charges.”
“Unfortunately we have no idea where Ryan’s mother is right now.”
Sandy heard the doctor sigh on the other end of the phone.
“That’s too bad. I’d like to go ahead and have Ryan make up those vaccinations, but only if he never received them. I wouldn’t do it for a few weeks anyway. I want to make sure he’s completely over the mumps. Perhaps, you’ll find something out about his mother in the mean time.”
“We can only hope,” replied Sandy. “Thank you again for all your trouble. I’ll be sure to call you if we find anything out.

Sandy stormed out of his office and drove home. When he arrived, he found Kirsten busy working on blueprints. She looked up when she heard him.
“Sandy, you’re early! I thought you had a meeting with…” she began, startled by the look on his face. “What on earth is wrong?”
“Where are the kids?” he asked.
“Ryan’s upstairs, napping. I checked on him about fifteen minutes ago and he’s sound asleep and Jimmy is picking Seth up from school with Marissa and Summer. He’s going to be there soon. Why? Sandy, what’s going on?”
Sandy sat down next to her.
“I just got a phone call from Dr. Greene.”
Sandy went on and detailed the conversation. By the time he was finished, Kirsten sat there in silence, shocked by what she had just learned.
“That woman is a monster. I can’t believe it took the authorities as long as it did to take her children away.”
“I’m just glad they finally did,” Sandy replied and squeezed his wife’s hand.
“Me too, honey. What are we going to do? I mean, from everything you’ve told me before, it doesn’t sound like we’ll ever be able to track her down.”
“I don’t know. Maybe there’s some kind of test they can run on Ryan to see if he’s actually had any of the vaccinations.”
“What are we going to tell him?”
“We can’t tell him the truth. We’ll have to lie and say that the clinic in Chino didn’t have all of his records.”
“I don’t like lying to him. He’s had enough adults do that to him in his life. Besides, he’s a smart kid, Sandy. Do you think he’ll believe us?”
“I don’t know, but I don’t see as we have much choice. I don’t want to live in fear that Ryan will contract some other disease that could have been prevented. The mumps were bad enough, but I’m not willing to risk it, especially considering what else he could still catch.”
“You’re right. I just wish there was some way we could know for sure without having to lie to him.”
Just then the phone rang and Sandy went to answer it.
“Sanford, just the man I wanted to talk to.”
“I’m sorry, Caleb. This isn’t a good time.”
“Maybe not, but I’ve got information on Ryan’s mother that I think you’re going to want to hear.”
“I’m listening.”

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Ryan’s heart was pounding and his head was still spinning from the nightmare that had awakened him. It was a bad one. Jake was hitting him while his mother stood by, telling him that he deserved it. He knew it was a dream and that he was safe with the Cohens, but it still left him feeling scared and vulnerable. He wanted Kirsten. She always made the bad dreams go away.
He crawled out of bed and started down the stairs. He was only half way down when he heard his foster parents talking. Something was wrong. Sandy was home really early and they both sounded upset. He knew it was wrong to eavesdrop, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself.
“She’s dead, Kirsten.” He heard Sandy say.
“Who’s dead?” Even from the steps, Ryan could tell by Kirsten’s voice that she didn’t really want to know the answer.
“Ryan’s mother. That was your father. He hired a private investigator to track her down. He wanted to make sure that she never got close enough to Ryan to hurt him again.”
“When? Where?”
“A few days ago. The P.I. found her in a morgue in New Mexico. She was listed as Jane Doe.”
“Then how can he be sure it’s Dawn?”
“Once they had a name to start with, they were able to positively identify her by her medical records. It’s her all right.”
“Do I even want to know how she died?”
“I’m sure you can guess. She overdosed on heroine. The cleaning lady at the motel she was staying in discovered the body in the bathroom.”
“If she was registered at a motel how come they didn’t know who she was?”
“Honey, the type of places that she stayed in, do not require identification. Besides, the manager said the room was rented to a man. He never saw Dawn before the police questioned him. Whoever she was shacking up with probably took off as soon as they figured out what happened.”
“What are we going to tell Ryan? He’s only five. He’s going to be devastated.”
Just then they heard the sounds of footsteps running up the stairs. They both raced up the stairs and into Ryan’s room. They found him throwing his clothes into his backpack.
“Sweetie, I’m so sorry.” Kirsten said. She reached out to him.
“No!” He pushed her hands away. “I shouldn’t be here. I need to go find my mom.”
“But, honey...”
“Don’t say it. Don’t you dare say it. She’s not dead. They made a mistake. She’s out there somewhere and I’m going to find her. She needs me. I’m her special helper. I should have never left her.”
He grabbed his backpack and headed for the door, but Sandy stopped him, pulling him into his arms. Ryan started kicking and screaming with all of his might.
“No. Let me go. Put me down. You don’t know what you’re talking about. She’s not dead. You’re lying. I hate you! ”