We can stop worrying about this shit when minorities (racial, sexual, developmental, etc) aren't still being oppressed and suppressed on a daily basis.
Don't do the song cover. The use of reclaimed words is only appropriate for the minorities in question. I'm okay with my friends calling me "dyke", but I don't want to see a heterosexual cisgendered male doing a cover of a lesbian song and using that term. It's just not his to use. And "dyke" doesn't have nearly the history of oppression that "nigger" does. Yes, we homos have been and are oppressed in many ways, but we haven't been enslaved, we haven't had our children sold, we haven't been the frequent victims of public hangings where the whole town would turn out to watch and bring picnic lunches, we've always been allowed to use the same water fountains and restaurants as everyone else, etc. Black people in North America and many other places have been far more oppressed than we homos have in the same areas, and that makes their terms of historical oppression that much more sensitive.
As for it being reclaimed by the black community, it's more accurate to say it's been reclaimed by *some* of the black community. There's a lot of intra-black debate about whether the word should be reclaimed, and if *anyone* should be using it at all, including other black people.
As for the kid, I feel for you. I live within a couple blocks of two high schools and I hear that shit All. The. Time. But there's very little chance of getting through to high-schoolers, since they've got this automatic rebellion against any adult. Hopefully your resident brat is still small enough that he can be reached. One thing though; prepare yourself for the possibility that after being confronted, he may well make a special point of shouting the word while going past your house. Kids (and people in general) can be douchebaggy like that.
I don't know about not getting through to high-schoolers. Sometimes you do. I used to work with high school students, and I can't think of anything more satisfying than when a group of cis, male, mostly straight teenagers adopted the phrase "that's so hetero" to point out when others were using gay as a pejorative. Which got everyone around them talking about language choice when they heard that response. The discussion went through that camp like wildfire.
I'd love to know more details about what sort of techniques you used with them. My experience with teenagers has been not-so-good. (Although that's always been in the context of asking them *not* to be dicks when they're hanging out at a playground and there's a bunch of little kids around.)
I watched an episode of the new show that MTV's been pushing, If You Really Knew Me, and I won't watch another episode because it is triggery as all hell for me. But the point is that it follows the Challenge Day program, which seems to be pretty good at getting high-schoolers to look at themselves and others in a different light. So yes, I suppose there *are* ways to reach them successfully.
Don't do the song cover. The use of reclaimed words is only appropriate for the minorities in question. I'm okay with my friends calling me "dyke", but I don't want to see a heterosexual cisgendered male doing a cover of a lesbian song and using that term. It's just not his to use. And "dyke" doesn't have nearly the history of oppression that "nigger" does. Yes, we homos have been and are oppressed in many ways, but we haven't been enslaved, we haven't had our children sold, we haven't been the frequent victims of public hangings where the whole town would turn out to watch and bring picnic lunches, we've always been allowed to use the same water fountains and restaurants as everyone else, etc. Black people in North America and many other places have been far more oppressed than we homos have in the same areas, and that makes their terms of historical oppression that much more sensitive.
As for it being reclaimed by the black community, it's more accurate to say it's been reclaimed by *some* of the black community. There's a lot of intra-black debate about whether the word should be reclaimed, and if *anyone* should be using it at all, including other black people.
As for the kid, I feel for you. I live within a couple blocks of two high schools and I hear that shit All. The. Time. But there's very little chance of getting through to high-schoolers, since they've got this automatic rebellion against any adult. Hopefully your resident brat is still small enough that he can be reached. One thing though; prepare yourself for the possibility that after being confronted, he may well make a special point of shouting the word while going past your house. Kids (and people in general) can be douchebaggy like that.
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I watched an episode of the new show that MTV's been pushing, If You Really Knew Me, and I won't watch another episode because it is triggery as all hell for me. But the point is that it follows the Challenge Day program, which seems to be pretty good at getting high-schoolers to look at themselves and others in a different light. So yes, I suppose there *are* ways to reach them successfully.
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