Fermenting sour feelings
Life is like the cartoon scene of the character in a boat that has just sprung a leak. The leak launches into the air and the character plugs it with his foot, just as another leak is sprung beside him. Soon after, the character is contorting his body to cover multiple leaks in his vessel to keep from drowning.
There is always a need for maintenance on something and it is highly possible that this is due to my obsessive compulsive personality. It seems that I am either an exceptional lover, son, friend, scholar, brother, social worker, housemate.... or just a half-assed one. It is difficult to understand that I can not become exceptional at all of these in a day because I get down on myself when I slack on any one aspect. I wish to show my gratitude by being the best at all of these things at once. I feel like I've been handing out excuses but there is validity to them. It is possible that I just need to prioritize. Speaking of prioritizing, I deleted my Facebook. I also sold a ton of possessions that I don't need on eBay. Anyway, I'm happy about life and this page serves as an incredible medium for me to bicker while riding high horses. Viva la Live Journal!
Summer has arrived! I've been slip-n-slidin', grillin', and just began to brew my first batch of beer. My gym visits have been consistently inconsistent but come June, I'll be riding my bike to work on the daily. I've also begun to read more often. A few friends have recently planted the idea of physically training for something like a bike ride, marathon, or martial art. I'm intrigued but busy. I'm re-grouping. I've also been doing some thinking about traveling. The recent student loan and car failure have made me scared of an inability to travel as I age. I'm going to handle these obligations and possibly save money to travel between work and grad school. It is crazy how life can change in a moment of time and some goals can become more/less probable than others. With the instability of my job, housing, and other aspects in my life, I have begun to try and see things as temporary. It's so simple to get caught up in the long-haul perspective; I'd like to ride the middle of a certain present and potential future.
I could go on forever. I'm realizing that I probably haven't updated this as often as thoughts should be organized. Future entries: becoming jaded, a spectacular girlfriend, poetry/lyricism, a Former Fat Kid zine entry, and a rant on the deliciousness of some vegan food I ate. Stay tuned, you desert of an internet page. I'm going to span Live Journals existence!
There is always a need for maintenance on something and it is highly possible that this is due to my obsessive compulsive personality. It seems that I am either an exceptional lover, son, friend, scholar, brother, social worker, housemate.... or just a half-assed one. It is difficult to understand that I can not become exceptional at all of these in a day because I get down on myself when I slack on any one aspect. I wish to show my gratitude by being the best at all of these things at once. I feel like I've been handing out excuses but there is validity to them. It is possible that I just need to prioritize. Speaking of prioritizing, I deleted my Facebook. I also sold a ton of possessions that I don't need on eBay. Anyway, I'm happy about life and this page serves as an incredible medium for me to bicker while riding high horses. Viva la Live Journal!
Summer has arrived! I've been slip-n-slidin', grillin', and just began to brew my first batch of beer. My gym visits have been consistently inconsistent but come June, I'll be riding my bike to work on the daily. I've also begun to read more often. A few friends have recently planted the idea of physically training for something like a bike ride, marathon, or martial art. I'm intrigued but busy. I'm re-grouping. I've also been doing some thinking about traveling. The recent student loan and car failure have made me scared of an inability to travel as I age. I'm going to handle these obligations and possibly save money to travel between work and grad school. It is crazy how life can change in a moment of time and some goals can become more/less probable than others. With the instability of my job, housing, and other aspects in my life, I have begun to try and see things as temporary. It's so simple to get caught up in the long-haul perspective; I'd like to ride the middle of a certain present and potential future.
I could go on forever. I'm realizing that I probably haven't updated this as often as thoughts should be organized. Future entries: becoming jaded, a spectacular girlfriend, poetry/lyricism, a Former Fat Kid zine entry, and a rant on the deliciousness of some vegan food I ate. Stay tuned, you desert of an internet page. I'm going to span Live Journals existence!