everything is going to be okay
it comes to me in flashes. it's a shame,
i wish this was tattooed across the inside of my eyelids:
everything is going to be okay.
if you ever leave, i will not only remain, but also be
stronger, smarter, faster, better, older, and god damnit,
STILL RIGHT HERE.
a., i fucking love you, i'll always love you.
last night we sat around naked, smiling and nuzzling
and even though you've been-with and been hurt-by many women before
you looked at me as if i were the only woman alive when you said
"baby you're so good to me. i'm so lucky to have you."
and it gives me chills every time, to kiss
that soft place on your neck, behind your ear, as it is always
an honor, for an animal to let you touch their weak spots.
my lion would not allow it for anything less than love.
11:11 PM to 11:11 AM i drifted in and out of sleep, but
it felt like i was gazing at you the whole time. i remember thinking
you are home. i could go anywhere with you, and i'm ready to.
as for the females that fill my time, with your paper-thin
"love", your snarky self-righteous bullshit, listen.
i will never again try to wedge you under my big toe
and you will never get me under yours. if you want to compete,
don't waste your time. leave me to my dirt and branches, go
attend to your aimless sexuality and drug-hunger. don't involve me
unless you are willing to humble yourself, level with me,
and spend your time BY MY SIDE, not IN MY FACE. i want truth,
not a performance. sing with me, not over me or above me.
let's go explore and test our limits, not each other's.
this is not anger or spite, i have nothing to gain. it's just
the honest truth: drama queen, you're wearing me thin.
alone in my house, finally it comes together and fits perfectly.
i realize that i don't need to quit school and work to have freedom;
i can fit more into a well-deserved weekend than an empty, hopeless month
even if it's nothing. it's MY nothing. i dragged my computer and speakers
out of my room and into the kitchen, plugged everything in,
danced on the tile with my socks on until i was breathless. and for once
i am truly glad to be alone, no self-conscious smiles, no one to entertain.
this day is mine, this life is mine, and i have nothing to be ashamed of,
nothing to reach for, nothing to crave, because i already have it all.
i wish this was tattooed across the inside of my eyelids:
everything is going to be okay.
if you ever leave, i will not only remain, but also be
stronger, smarter, faster, better, older, and god damnit,
STILL RIGHT HERE.
a., i fucking love you, i'll always love you.
last night we sat around naked, smiling and nuzzling
and even though you've been-with and been hurt-by many women before
you looked at me as if i were the only woman alive when you said
"baby you're so good to me. i'm so lucky to have you."
and it gives me chills every time, to kiss
that soft place on your neck, behind your ear, as it is always
an honor, for an animal to let you touch their weak spots.
my lion would not allow it for anything less than love.
11:11 PM to 11:11 AM i drifted in and out of sleep, but
it felt like i was gazing at you the whole time. i remember thinking
you are home. i could go anywhere with you, and i'm ready to.
as for the females that fill my time, with your paper-thin
"love", your snarky self-righteous bullshit, listen.
i will never again try to wedge you under my big toe
and you will never get me under yours. if you want to compete,
don't waste your time. leave me to my dirt and branches, go
attend to your aimless sexuality and drug-hunger. don't involve me
unless you are willing to humble yourself, level with me,
and spend your time BY MY SIDE, not IN MY FACE. i want truth,
not a performance. sing with me, not over me or above me.
let's go explore and test our limits, not each other's.
this is not anger or spite, i have nothing to gain. it's just
the honest truth: drama queen, you're wearing me thin.
alone in my house, finally it comes together and fits perfectly.
i realize that i don't need to quit school and work to have freedom;
i can fit more into a well-deserved weekend than an empty, hopeless month
even if it's nothing. it's MY nothing. i dragged my computer and speakers
out of my room and into the kitchen, plugged everything in,
danced on the tile with my socks on until i was breathless. and for once
i am truly glad to be alone, no self-conscious smiles, no one to entertain.
this day is mine, this life is mine, and i have nothing to be ashamed of,
nothing to reach for, nothing to crave, because i already have it all.