230 weeks since ive updated
This is just me venting.
I cant believe im doing this. im in class and im so frustrated and i was going to update my status with something like "i cant handle this" but then i thought it was stupid and then i thought i have a lot more to say than that. So i remembered lj. I feel like punching walls and running out of my class. Ive been so sad lately and i cant even function properly. I dont have a book so im stuck thinking and spacing out. Honestly i probably wouldve done that anyway.
So i have this big situation that im stuck in..i feel like im stuck in a closed room with no windows or walls and that moves around a lot to annoy me. Kind of like the room nsync is in in their bye bye bye video cept not as cool and no ones fucking dancing in it.
I feel really a lone right now even though i have good friends i feel like theyre all busy with their own stuff or guys. Im happy for them but im kinda jealous. Ive been in a secure loving relationship for 4 complete years. Now everything is different. I went through a lot in the summer and then my dog died to top it off ...i know its not nearly as important but it just realllllly topped it off.
I feel like theres nothing left of me..like its the biggest task in the world for me to just stand up on my 2 feet. I dunno like my bones are slowly turning into jello or some shit.
I feel bad cuz i feel a little crazy and weak right now and i dont even have time to pay attention to ppl around me and their problems and whenever i do i feel like i need to focus on myself. Im all over the fucking place. I cant think right.
everything around me is so complicated, all the ppl around me like myself have a lot of secrets and ive noticed how much my life just seems like degrassi. If my life were a show right now it'd kick the Oc and degrassi's ass. Theres more dramody and crazy shit in my life than there is in those shows..the only thing is left is for someone that i know to overdose or something ..my friend Y made me realize that lol.
I want things i cant have.
I want to be happy.
I cant believe im doing this. im in class and im so frustrated and i was going to update my status with something like "i cant handle this" but then i thought it was stupid and then i thought i have a lot more to say than that. So i remembered lj. I feel like punching walls and running out of my class. Ive been so sad lately and i cant even function properly. I dont have a book so im stuck thinking and spacing out. Honestly i probably wouldve done that anyway.
So i have this big situation that im stuck in..i feel like im stuck in a closed room with no windows or walls and that moves around a lot to annoy me. Kind of like the room nsync is in in their bye bye bye video cept not as cool and no ones fucking dancing in it.
I feel really a lone right now even though i have good friends i feel like theyre all busy with their own stuff or guys. Im happy for them but im kinda jealous. Ive been in a secure loving relationship for 4 complete years. Now everything is different. I went through a lot in the summer and then my dog died to top it off ...i know its not nearly as important but it just realllllly topped it off.
I feel like theres nothing left of me..like its the biggest task in the world for me to just stand up on my 2 feet. I dunno like my bones are slowly turning into jello or some shit.
I feel bad cuz i feel a little crazy and weak right now and i dont even have time to pay attention to ppl around me and their problems and whenever i do i feel like i need to focus on myself. Im all over the fucking place. I cant think right.
everything around me is so complicated, all the ppl around me like myself have a lot of secrets and ive noticed how much my life just seems like degrassi. If my life were a show right now it'd kick the Oc and degrassi's ass. Theres more dramody and crazy shit in my life than there is in those shows..the only thing is left is for someone that i know to overdose or something ..my friend Y made me realize that lol.
I want things i cant have.
I want to be happy.