Perfect Life (Chapter Sixteen)
There was a strange, contemplative silence in the corridor that held all the people who loved Emily. Nobody dared say anything, they were all too busy lost in thought, lost in prayer, lost in anything that would bring Emily back to them sooner. James had arrived at some point, Naomi wasn’t sure when he’d arrived, but he’d brought them food and drink. Naomi’s sandwich still sat untouched, despite Gina’s pleas for her to at least attempt to eat something.
Standing up, Naomi saw the look of panic flash across JJ and Katie’s face, they obviously thought she was leaving again. It made Naomi feel guilty, she would hate explaining to Emily that she’d run out on her, but she also knew that Emily would understand.
“Just having a smoke, promise.” Naomi muttered, shaking the packet of cigarettes as if having to prove herself.
Katie nodded in response, before falling back into the comfort of JJ’s shoulder. Telling herself that Emily must be okay, because if she wasn’t she would feel it, they were twins, she would feel if Emily was gone.
It felt a lot better outside, Naomi didn’t even fancy a cigarette, she just let it burn away slowly between her fingers. Closing her eyes, all she could see was Emily, it was as if her girlfriend had been burned into her mind. The beautiful smile, the loving eyes, her husky voice, and the dirtiest giggle she’d ever heard on someone who walked around looking so innocent.
“Mind if I?” Jenna’s voice cut through the silence, her hand indicating towards Naomi’s cigarette, slightly surprised Naomi passed it over. Watching as Jenna inhaled deeply, sitting herself down next to Naomi.
“Didn’t know you smoked.” Naomi smiled, to be honest there was probably a lot she didn’t know about Jenna Fitch, they hadn’t exactly sat down for a bonding session.
“Don’t tell Rob... I don’t, I mean not really. Special occasions.” Jenna stuttered, before laughing at how she sounded like a naughty teenage girl, who’d just been caught by her mother.
“Our little secret.” Naomi nodded, refusing the cigarette when Jenna offered it back to her. “I’m supposed to be giving up, Emily hates me smoking.”
They sat in silence after that, oddly comfortable, they were both thinking about Emily, both thinking off all the things that they would say to her, all the things that they would apologise for.
“I’m going to ask Emily to marry me.” Naomi suddenly blurted out, even if she wasn’t traditional, it still seemed like the right thing to do, to get parental permission.
“Right... Well, you’ve been together a long time, and the baby, I suppose its the right thing to do.” Jenna sighed, because as much as she tried, it was still hard to understand.
“You’re not happy about it.” Naomi pointed out, she could see the look in Jenna’s eyes, and once again Naomi felt completely useless, like she would never be good enough, and like she would always be causing trouble for Emily with her family.
“I’m. I’m getting used to the idea.” Jenna smiled, trying to give a show of encouragement, because for the first time she really was trying. “You’re right for Emily, I've known this for a really long time, it’s just as a mother you want your child to have the best of everything. I had to be sure you were right.”
“It’s taken you ten years to work this out?” Naomi laughed, her eyes meeting Jenna’s as the pair reached a mutual understanding, this certainly was going to be a surprise for Emily when she woke up.
“I’m a little slow.” Jenna laughed back, pulling her future daughter-in-law up. “Come on, lets see how Emily’s getting on.”
**
“So are you like, shagging my sister?” James whispered to JJ, despite the seriousness of the situation, James never failed to take an opportunity to make someone feel deeply uncomfortable.
“Er... Well... No, you shouldn’t be really asking me things like this, because well for one we’re sat in a hospital, and also she’s your sister!” JJ stuttered, trying to calm himself after the shock of what James had said.
“I’m a big boy mate, I just want to know whether you’ll be joining us for Sunday roast?” James shrugged, chuckling to himself at how flustered he’d made JJ.
“James, you should respect your sister. In fact you should respect all females, and asking about their sexual partners really isn’t showing respect.” JJ smiled, watching as James mulled this over in his mind.
“So does this mean you aren’t getting any?” James laughed, only stopping when his father glared at him from the other side of the corridor.
“Sorry about him.” Katie smiled, quite impressed with how JJ had dealt with her little brother, remembering the first time that Naomi had met him she’d simply resorted to a swift, hard kick under the table, something that had reoccurred a lot over the years.
“I think he’s just looking for a distraction, he’s worried about Emily too. Do you think we’ll hear anything soon?” JJ questioned, he was getting seriously agitated with all the waiting, he needed to know about his best friend.
“It shouldn’t be too much longer J. Do you want to go for a walk? I need to clear my head.” Katie suggested, grateful when JJ nodded so that they could get out of the claustrophobic corridor that felt like it would strangle her.
**
Naomi fiddled with the ring in her pocket, it was something she did for comfort now, it made her hopeful, it made her think about the future. She’d planned out a million different ways of proposing in the time she’d spent waiting, all of them seemed too over the top, or completely insignificant, so she’d just decided to trust her instinct when the time was right.
The sight of the doctor walking towards them, caught everyones attention, a whole collection of expectant faces looking out at the man who held all the power, who held the answer to whether their lives would be destroyed, or not.
“Well, it’s good news, everything with the operation went well, no complications.” the doctor smiled.
If there was a prize for the loudest sigh of collective relief in the world, Emily’s family would have won it hands down. Naomi almost couldn’t control the butterflies in her stomach, the thought of her Emily being okay, the thought of her Emily smiling at her again.
“Can we see her?” Naomi asked, it was complete desperation, she needed to be with Emily.
“One person can go and sit with her.” The doctor nodded, watching as Naomi looked round expectantly at everyone, hoping that they would give her the ok to follow the doctor to Emily’s bedside. With a smile, Jenna gave her a look which told Naomi she could go.
**
“JJ I did something earlier.” Katie admitted, it wasn’t that she thought she was wrong in her actions. It was simply that she hadn’t discussed it with anyone else before she went ahead and did it.
“What kind of something?” JJ questioned, intrigued by how Katie was acting, really it could be anything. Katie was constantly surprising him, and though he thought he knew her pretty well, there were still somethings he couldn’t read.
“I talked to the police, I told them about Effy leaving the house. They’re going to want to talk to you J, take a statement from you.” Katie admitted, it was just after she’d found out about Emily in surgery, she’d slipped away from everyone and drove the short way to the police station.
“I thought Naomi asked you to leave it, she’s already feeling completely out of control, with everything that is going on. Naomi wanted to deal with Effy.” JJ reminded her, though he couldn’t get angry at Katie, she’d done the right thing.
“The only reason Naomi hasn’t gone to the police, is incase anything happens to Emily, Naomi wants to be able to deal with Effy in her own way. If anything JJ by getting the police involved now, we’re helping Naomi if... If the worst happens.” Katie gulped, she hated even considering the possibility of everything not being alright with Emily, or her niece.
“You did the right thing.” JJ smiled, knowing Katie needed support, someone to tell her she’d made the right decision. “Would you like to go back to the hospital now?”
“Not really. That sounds really bad doesn’t it? I just need some time away from that place, mum or James will text me if anything happens. Can we just go somewhere?” Katie asked, feeling guilty for suggesting being anywhere but with her sister, but it was too hard right now.
“Well, my rabbit Houdini is probably feeling rather hungry right now, but I don’t want you to think I'm trying to get you back to my place.” JJ blushed, feeling like a bit of an idiot and trying to prevent himself from getting locked on. But just as he felt that familiar tension and worry rise up in him, the hand that placed itself inside his calmed him down.
“Lets go feed Houdini.” Katie laughed, leaning into JJ, enjoying the support he provided.
**
Naomi couldn’t help but feel terrified by all the wires that surrounded Emily, she couldn’t help feeling terrified by Emily’s appearance either, bruises that stood out so vividly due to the paleness of Emily’s skin. Stroking away a piece of Emily’s hair, Naomi felt like her heart would explode, this love was terrifying as well, it was the strongest force she knew.
“I’m going to talk to you, even if you can’t hear me, or even if you can hear me and you just want me to shut up, i’m going to talk to you.” Naomi started, laughing at herself, feeling slightly ridiculous. “Ems we have a daughter, she’s really beautiful, like you. She’s tiny, but she’s strong, a fighter and I know she’ll be okay.” Naomi continued, it felt easier now, less ridiculous so she carried on. “We’ll be the best family in the world, well probably not the best, because I'll still be a moany twat, and you’ll still be the messiest person alive, but we’ll be really happy... I could sit here and promise you the world Em, but I probably wouldn’t be able to give it to you, and in fact I think promising you something that I can’t give you, is probably worse than admitting I can’t give it to you. What I can promise is myself, and for some reason, a reason I will never understand, you really like me, love me. So I think promising myself, promising every single part of me, is something you’ll really like.”
Naomi took a deep breath, steadying herself she leaned in and placed a kiss on Emily’s lips, so softly... Praying almost that it would wake her sleeping beauty, with no reaction Naomi instead leaned in to Emily and gently whispered in her ear.
“I’m going to ask you to marry me Emily, so come back to me.”
Standing up, Naomi saw the look of panic flash across JJ and Katie’s face, they obviously thought she was leaving again. It made Naomi feel guilty, she would hate explaining to Emily that she’d run out on her, but she also knew that Emily would understand.
“Just having a smoke, promise.” Naomi muttered, shaking the packet of cigarettes as if having to prove herself.
Katie nodded in response, before falling back into the comfort of JJ’s shoulder. Telling herself that Emily must be okay, because if she wasn’t she would feel it, they were twins, she would feel if Emily was gone.
It felt a lot better outside, Naomi didn’t even fancy a cigarette, she just let it burn away slowly between her fingers. Closing her eyes, all she could see was Emily, it was as if her girlfriend had been burned into her mind. The beautiful smile, the loving eyes, her husky voice, and the dirtiest giggle she’d ever heard on someone who walked around looking so innocent.
“Mind if I?” Jenna’s voice cut through the silence, her hand indicating towards Naomi’s cigarette, slightly surprised Naomi passed it over. Watching as Jenna inhaled deeply, sitting herself down next to Naomi.
“Didn’t know you smoked.” Naomi smiled, to be honest there was probably a lot she didn’t know about Jenna Fitch, they hadn’t exactly sat down for a bonding session.
“Don’t tell Rob... I don’t, I mean not really. Special occasions.” Jenna stuttered, before laughing at how she sounded like a naughty teenage girl, who’d just been caught by her mother.
“Our little secret.” Naomi nodded, refusing the cigarette when Jenna offered it back to her. “I’m supposed to be giving up, Emily hates me smoking.”
They sat in silence after that, oddly comfortable, they were both thinking about Emily, both thinking off all the things that they would say to her, all the things that they would apologise for.
“I’m going to ask Emily to marry me.” Naomi suddenly blurted out, even if she wasn’t traditional, it still seemed like the right thing to do, to get parental permission.
“Right... Well, you’ve been together a long time, and the baby, I suppose its the right thing to do.” Jenna sighed, because as much as she tried, it was still hard to understand.
“You’re not happy about it.” Naomi pointed out, she could see the look in Jenna’s eyes, and once again Naomi felt completely useless, like she would never be good enough, and like she would always be causing trouble for Emily with her family.
“I’m. I’m getting used to the idea.” Jenna smiled, trying to give a show of encouragement, because for the first time she really was trying. “You’re right for Emily, I've known this for a really long time, it’s just as a mother you want your child to have the best of everything. I had to be sure you were right.”
“It’s taken you ten years to work this out?” Naomi laughed, her eyes meeting Jenna’s as the pair reached a mutual understanding, this certainly was going to be a surprise for Emily when she woke up.
“I’m a little slow.” Jenna laughed back, pulling her future daughter-in-law up. “Come on, lets see how Emily’s getting on.”
**
“So are you like, shagging my sister?” James whispered to JJ, despite the seriousness of the situation, James never failed to take an opportunity to make someone feel deeply uncomfortable.
“Er... Well... No, you shouldn’t be really asking me things like this, because well for one we’re sat in a hospital, and also she’s your sister!” JJ stuttered, trying to calm himself after the shock of what James had said.
“I’m a big boy mate, I just want to know whether you’ll be joining us for Sunday roast?” James shrugged, chuckling to himself at how flustered he’d made JJ.
“James, you should respect your sister. In fact you should respect all females, and asking about their sexual partners really isn’t showing respect.” JJ smiled, watching as James mulled this over in his mind.
“So does this mean you aren’t getting any?” James laughed, only stopping when his father glared at him from the other side of the corridor.
“Sorry about him.” Katie smiled, quite impressed with how JJ had dealt with her little brother, remembering the first time that Naomi had met him she’d simply resorted to a swift, hard kick under the table, something that had reoccurred a lot over the years.
“I think he’s just looking for a distraction, he’s worried about Emily too. Do you think we’ll hear anything soon?” JJ questioned, he was getting seriously agitated with all the waiting, he needed to know about his best friend.
“It shouldn’t be too much longer J. Do you want to go for a walk? I need to clear my head.” Katie suggested, grateful when JJ nodded so that they could get out of the claustrophobic corridor that felt like it would strangle her.
**
Naomi fiddled with the ring in her pocket, it was something she did for comfort now, it made her hopeful, it made her think about the future. She’d planned out a million different ways of proposing in the time she’d spent waiting, all of them seemed too over the top, or completely insignificant, so she’d just decided to trust her instinct when the time was right.
The sight of the doctor walking towards them, caught everyones attention, a whole collection of expectant faces looking out at the man who held all the power, who held the answer to whether their lives would be destroyed, or not.
“Well, it’s good news, everything with the operation went well, no complications.” the doctor smiled.
If there was a prize for the loudest sigh of collective relief in the world, Emily’s family would have won it hands down. Naomi almost couldn’t control the butterflies in her stomach, the thought of her Emily being okay, the thought of her Emily smiling at her again.
“Can we see her?” Naomi asked, it was complete desperation, she needed to be with Emily.
“One person can go and sit with her.” The doctor nodded, watching as Naomi looked round expectantly at everyone, hoping that they would give her the ok to follow the doctor to Emily’s bedside. With a smile, Jenna gave her a look which told Naomi she could go.
**
“JJ I did something earlier.” Katie admitted, it wasn’t that she thought she was wrong in her actions. It was simply that she hadn’t discussed it with anyone else before she went ahead and did it.
“What kind of something?” JJ questioned, intrigued by how Katie was acting, really it could be anything. Katie was constantly surprising him, and though he thought he knew her pretty well, there were still somethings he couldn’t read.
“I talked to the police, I told them about Effy leaving the house. They’re going to want to talk to you J, take a statement from you.” Katie admitted, it was just after she’d found out about Emily in surgery, she’d slipped away from everyone and drove the short way to the police station.
“I thought Naomi asked you to leave it, she’s already feeling completely out of control, with everything that is going on. Naomi wanted to deal with Effy.” JJ reminded her, though he couldn’t get angry at Katie, she’d done the right thing.
“The only reason Naomi hasn’t gone to the police, is incase anything happens to Emily, Naomi wants to be able to deal with Effy in her own way. If anything JJ by getting the police involved now, we’re helping Naomi if... If the worst happens.” Katie gulped, she hated even considering the possibility of everything not being alright with Emily, or her niece.
“You did the right thing.” JJ smiled, knowing Katie needed support, someone to tell her she’d made the right decision. “Would you like to go back to the hospital now?”
“Not really. That sounds really bad doesn’t it? I just need some time away from that place, mum or James will text me if anything happens. Can we just go somewhere?” Katie asked, feeling guilty for suggesting being anywhere but with her sister, but it was too hard right now.
“Well, my rabbit Houdini is probably feeling rather hungry right now, but I don’t want you to think I'm trying to get you back to my place.” JJ blushed, feeling like a bit of an idiot and trying to prevent himself from getting locked on. But just as he felt that familiar tension and worry rise up in him, the hand that placed itself inside his calmed him down.
“Lets go feed Houdini.” Katie laughed, leaning into JJ, enjoying the support he provided.
**
Naomi couldn’t help but feel terrified by all the wires that surrounded Emily, she couldn’t help feeling terrified by Emily’s appearance either, bruises that stood out so vividly due to the paleness of Emily’s skin. Stroking away a piece of Emily’s hair, Naomi felt like her heart would explode, this love was terrifying as well, it was the strongest force she knew.
“I’m going to talk to you, even if you can’t hear me, or even if you can hear me and you just want me to shut up, i’m going to talk to you.” Naomi started, laughing at herself, feeling slightly ridiculous. “Ems we have a daughter, she’s really beautiful, like you. She’s tiny, but she’s strong, a fighter and I know she’ll be okay.” Naomi continued, it felt easier now, less ridiculous so she carried on. “We’ll be the best family in the world, well probably not the best, because I'll still be a moany twat, and you’ll still be the messiest person alive, but we’ll be really happy... I could sit here and promise you the world Em, but I probably wouldn’t be able to give it to you, and in fact I think promising you something that I can’t give you, is probably worse than admitting I can’t give it to you. What I can promise is myself, and for some reason, a reason I will never understand, you really like me, love me. So I think promising myself, promising every single part of me, is something you’ll really like.”
Naomi took a deep breath, steadying herself she leaned in and placed a kiss on Emily’s lips, so softly... Praying almost that it would wake her sleeping beauty, with no reaction Naomi instead leaned in to Emily and gently whispered in her ear.
“I’m going to ask you to marry me Emily, so come back to me.”