i'm sometimes a fucking mess.
i pretend to be okay when i'm not. and i spin in circles like a whirling dervish. and i whine like a little bitch. and i kiss lots of girls to make me feel better about myself. i'm pretty sure i don't like myself. i have to put it on this internet journal so that you'll say it's okay and make me feel better. i don't think anyone can make themselves feel better. i'm a big fucking liar. i fall in love with a snap of the fingers. you know that kid that walks into his first day of fifth grade and forgets his supplies?
i want someone to come rescue me, but i'm pretty sure i'm the only one who can do that. and it's scary, and it's hard, because i've never had to do this for myself. i haven't really done anything substantial for myself in my entire life. i'm a narcissist and a masochist, but not physically on either count. and i use big words when i hardly know what they mean, but i'm trying. and i still listen to death cab for cutie and coldplay when i'm really fucking depressed and scared.
who wants coffee? i was going to end my entry with that question. i'm always so fucking cheeky. i tell people to let go when i'm white-knuckled holding on for dear life. this concludes today's plea for attention.
i want someone to come rescue me, but i'm pretty sure i'm the only one who can do that. and it's scary, and it's hard, because i've never had to do this for myself. i haven't really done anything substantial for myself in my entire life. i'm a narcissist and a masochist, but not physically on either count. and i use big words when i hardly know what they mean, but i'm trying. and i still listen to death cab for cutie and coldplay when i'm really fucking depressed and scared.
who wants coffee? i was going to end my entry with that question. i'm always so fucking cheeky. i tell people to let go when i'm white-knuckled holding on for dear life. this concludes today's plea for attention.