Saiyuki fic for valentine_smut "Indulgence" (38 - NC17)
Title: Indulgence
Author: brainfuneral
Rating: NC17
Pairing(s): Sanzo/Hakkai (38)
Disclaimer: They are definitely not mine, I just play with them!
Summary: Sanzo urges Hakkai to cast off his old self.
Author's notes: Written for seshats_prodigy at valentine_smut. I've always secretly wanted to write 38, and I thank my requester and the Merciful Goddess for giving me the chance! The prompt was 'surprises' - and I swear it's in there somewhere!
Gonou stared at his unbound hands. He heard the click of Sanzo's lighter and the intake of breath. Around him, the everyday sounds of temple life filled his ears. Monks and apprentices chatted in hushed tones. More than once, he heard the name 'Cho Gonou' among words such as 'sinner' and 'murderer'. The skin of his palms appeared soft, the unblemished skin showing no outward sign of the carnage his hands had reaped.
Beside him, Sanzo exhaled slowly. Gonou smelled the acrid air as it left Sanzo's lips and encircled them before blowing away in the light breeze. “Stop staring at your hands like they should have shackles around them. Let's go.” Sanzo's voice was gruff, and he didn't wait for a reply. Gonou's eyes didn't leave his outstretched hands, but he saw Sanzo's sandaled feet moving forward, his long robe swishing and swaying as he walked. Gonou realized that he should follow the priest or he'd be left behind. He realized that he was no longer Gonou, but Hakkai now. Dropping his hands to his sides, he stepped forward.
Sanzo led him through a maze of corridors, all filled with monks who bowed as Sanzo passed. Paying them no mind, he continued on, his footsteps echoing in the silence that preceded his approach. Gonou felt the averted eyes of the nameless, faceless monks on his back, on the bandage covering his right eye, on his hands clasped at his back.
Stopping at one of the doors that lined the long hall, Sanzo turned to a young attendant that had appeared at his elbow. “Bring us some food. And we are not to be disturbed.”
“Of course, Sanzo-sama,” the boy said, and hurried away. Sanzo stepped inside the room and Gonou followed.
The room was utilitarian, but the few decorative pieces were ornate and appeared very old. A large wooden desk dominated one wall, and a simple bed was tucked into the opposite corner. Sanzo went to sit in the spacious sill of the large window, which looked out over the temple garden. He lit a cigarette and closed his eyes for a moment before turning back to Gonou.
“I'll have them bring a futon for you later. You'll sleep here for the time being.”
“These are your quarters.”
“Yes.”
Gonou hovered in the middle of the room, unsure where to stand and what to say. Not Gonou, Hakkai now. He looked to Sanzo, smoking on the window sill casually. The smell of Sanzo's tobacco drifted lazily about the room. The silence hummed in Gonou's ears. Not Gonou, Hakkai.
“I didn't ask you to defend me,” Gonou said, and his voice reverberated through the quarters and sounded back into his ears, much louder than he had intended. The priest sat immobile, looking more like a beautiful holy statue than the caustic man who had vouched for his continued existence. The late afternoon sunlight shone through the window and caught exactly the right shades in Sanzo's hair to make it appear as a golden, ethereal light around the priest's head. He set his eyes on Gonou and exhaled, smoke streaming from his mouth and hanging in the air.
“No. You asked to be punished.”
“That's right.”
Sanzo looked him up and down, and Gonou felt himself stiffen under the inspection of his gaze. He snorted, his mouth turning into a sneer that smacked of disappointment. “'The worst possible punishment, as no true penance could ever fit my crimes', you said.”
“Yes.” Gonou squirmed, but did not break eye contact with the priest who had saved his miserable life.
“Speak to me again when you realize that you've been handed the worst possible sentence, and the only atonement fit for someone like you.”
Gonou started, opened his mouth but did not speak as the meaning of Sanzo's words hit him. He fell to his knees and regarded the priest above him, still perched on the window sill. Sanzo's face was grave, not capable of pity, but full of understanding.
“You mean-”
“You will live. You will live with what you have done and this alone will be the cruelest judgment I could ever inflict on you.”
***
Hakkai entered the private outdoor bath and nodded to the young attendant that had led him inside. He bowed and left silently. Hakkai stepped into the changing room and shed his borrowed clothes in favor of one of the light robes provided.
Fetching a towel, he slid open the door to the bath. Sanzo was alone, soaking in the small private pool. Moisture clung to his hair, making it flop into his face and cover his eyes. He looked as relaxed as Hakkai had ever seen him; in their shared time together, he had smoked casually and shared silence comfortably, but Hakkai hadn't seen him truly relax.
Hakkai quietly disrobed and slipped into the water, hissing at the near-scalding temperature. Sanzo opened his eyes and stirred on the other side of the bath. “I'm sorry if I disturbed you,” Hakkai said.
“I'm the one who sent for you.”
“True, though I'm not entirely certain why.”
Sanzo just grunted and rose until his chest and shoulders were visible above the surface of the water. Hakkai settled himself on a seat next to the priest and tried not to stare at Sanzo's muscular torso, glistening with sweat and steam.
“I wanted to talk to you. And I wanted a bath. That is all.”
Hakkai felt a smile rise his cheeks naturally, and found the effort required was minuscule. He was finding it easier everyday to slip into a smile. “I see. Well, I certainly won't complain, it's been ages since I've had a proper bath.”
“Mmm,” Sanzo hummed in response. He cupped his hands in the water and brought them up to pour over his face, the water running down his graceful features in rivulets. The next handful of water went over his chest and shoulders.
Hakkai coughed quietly, feeling as if he had intruded on Sanzo's privacy. “I'm somewhat surprised that you are the outdoor bath type, Sanzo. Such simple pleasures seem...”
“Seem what? Unfit for a priest?”
“Perhaps not unfit, just not ... exactly the type of activity one pictures a holy man enjoying.”
Sanzo snorted, and fixed his eyes on Hakkai. “You've got a lot to learn, Hakkai, if you think that indulging the body has anything to do with being a priest.”
“I suppose. Then again, I've learned that my preconceptions of priests have little to do with you, Sanzo.” Hakkai settled deeper into the water, stretching out his legs and arms. He sighed, letting the heat of the water and the steamy air wash over him.
He felt Sanzo's eyes on him, and found the priest staring at him intently. “I thought that you wanted to die,” Sanzo said.
“Curiously enough, it seems that whim has passed.”
“I see. You've cast off the conceits of Cho Gonou. Good.”
“Yes, I find I am learning more everyday about this man named Cho Hakkai. Are you surprised?”
“No. If I'd have thought you were too weak to begin life anew I would have killed you myself.”
Hakkai chuckled, sending small waves across the still water. “I suppose I should have expected that from you.” He smiled at the priest, and found it to be one of his easiest smiles.
Sanzo leaned forward, crossing the space between their bodies and kissed him. It wasn't a soft kiss, though the humid air made their lips slide against each other. It wasn't tentative, wasn't a question. Startled by the sudden gesture, Hakkai didn't resist or pull away, but opened his mouth to Sanzo's invading tongue. Grabbing the back of Hakkai's head, Sanzo smashed their mouthes together. Tongue thrust into Hakkai's mouth, Sanzo kissed him in earnest. Closing his eyes, Hakkai let himself be embraced, feeling the warmth of Sanzo's body against him. He let the sensations wash over him; he felt the heat of the steam in the air, the tight grip of Sanzo's fingers on his head, Sanzo's wet lips against his own.
When Sanzo pulled away, he kept his hold on Hakkai's head. He looked at Hakkai, satisfied. Hakkai felt his lips swell, felt the flush rising to his cheeks. He breathed heavily, head spinning with the heat and the sudden embrace.
“You're not one of those ridiculous people who believes that by ignoring and suppressing our physical desires they'll go away, are you?” Sanzo said, his voice low. He deliberately placed a hand on Hakkai's thigh and kneaded the sensitive skin with his fingers. “One who thinks that through piety, chastity and denial we magically gain enlightenment.”
Feeling his erection stirring at Sanzo's touch, Hakkai answered, “apparently not.”
“Good.”
This time, Hakkai let his tongue dance with Sanzo's when the priest kissed him. He slid his hands up to grip Sanzo's shoulders. When they broke apart again, Hakkai said, “I suppose I just never considered acting on such physical desires again.”
The hand that had held Hakkai's head travelled down past his neck and shoulders, touching lightly. Sanzo's fingers brushed over a nipple and Hakkai shuddered. “So, Cho Gonou preemptively doomed Cho Hakkai to celibacy.” Sanzo's fingers lingered at the other nipple and rubbed in circles around the sensitive, hardened nub.
“Not necessarily, though I had considered it.” Hakkai sighed, now fully erect. “I certainly never contemplated acting out my desires with a man, let alone the highest-ranking priest in Shangri-la and the man who saved my life.”
Abandoning Hakkai's nipple, Sanzo turned his attention to the deeply scarred flesh of his abdomen. He traced the outline of the scar lightly, hand dipping in and out of the water. Placing his hand flat against the ridged skin of Hakkai's stomach, Sanzo said, “aren't you the one who said he was learning new things about himself everyday?”
Sanzo's hand dipped lower, and without preamble he gripped Hakkai's cock. Hakkai gasped and his hips surged upward. “Sanzo! I-” Opening his eyes, Hakkai found Sanzo's trained on him. He stroked Hakkai's cock rhythmically while he watched Hakkai's reactions intently. Finding that he couldn't suppress it, Hakkai moaned and heard his voice, rising above the sound of the water, which rippled with every movement of Sanzo's hand.
Leaving Hakkai's cock for a moment, Sanzo wound his arms around Hakkai's slender hips. He pulled Hakkai up and toward him. Hakkai moved with him, eager to regain Sanzo's touch. Straddling Sanzo's thighs, Hakkai felt ridiculous and exposed, but soon was lost to the pleasure he felt when Sanzo resumed rubbing his cock. Hakkai reached out to grab the edge of the pool behind Sanzo's head for support, and ardently thrust his hips in time with Sanzo's hand.
Hakkai found Sanzo's cock with his other hand and hesitantly wrapped his fingers around the base. He took the rumbling sound from Sanzo's throat as encouragement, and began mimicking the rhythm that Sanzo set. The feeling of Sanzo's erection was foreign, but the sound of his breath coming in short bursts coupled with the excitement of Sanzo's hand on his own cock was exquisite.
“Hakkai,” Sanzo said, and grabbed his ass with his free hand. He squeezed firmly while he brushed his thumb across the ridge separating the base and head of Hakkai's cock. “This is your body, not Gonou's”
Sanzo thrust his hips up to meet Hakkai's hand. Hakkai tightened his grip on the priest and felt him grow harder.
“Setting aside the wish to die is not the same as living. This is your body, Hakkai, own it.” With that, Sanzo tightened his fist around the tip of his penis, and Hakkai came with a strangled cry.
Releasing him, Sanzo placed his hand on top of Hakkai's and moved them both up and down on his own cock. After a few quick strokes, Sanzo came, covering both of their hands. He shuddered underneath Hakkai, and let out his breath slowly.
Hakkai struggled to regain his breath in the stifling, saturated air of the bath. He glanced down at the water in between their bodies, and saw the glimmer of their come. He felt heat rise to his face as he realized he was sitting on Sanzo. He tried to raise himself from the priest, but Sanzo held him in place with the hand still firmly groping his ass.
“Sanzo?”
Sanzo looked him in the eye, and said, “You will live, Hakkai.”
Smiling effortlessly at Sanzo, Hakkai replied, “yes, yes I will.”
Nodding, Sanzo released him.
Author: brainfuneral
Rating: NC17
Pairing(s): Sanzo/Hakkai (38)
Disclaimer: They are definitely not mine, I just play with them!
Summary: Sanzo urges Hakkai to cast off his old self.
Author's notes: Written for seshats_prodigy at valentine_smut. I've always secretly wanted to write 38, and I thank my requester and the Merciful Goddess for giving me the chance! The prompt was 'surprises' - and I swear it's in there somewhere!
Gonou stared at his unbound hands. He heard the click of Sanzo's lighter and the intake of breath. Around him, the everyday sounds of temple life filled his ears. Monks and apprentices chatted in hushed tones. More than once, he heard the name 'Cho Gonou' among words such as 'sinner' and 'murderer'. The skin of his palms appeared soft, the unblemished skin showing no outward sign of the carnage his hands had reaped.
Beside him, Sanzo exhaled slowly. Gonou smelled the acrid air as it left Sanzo's lips and encircled them before blowing away in the light breeze. “Stop staring at your hands like they should have shackles around them. Let's go.” Sanzo's voice was gruff, and he didn't wait for a reply. Gonou's eyes didn't leave his outstretched hands, but he saw Sanzo's sandaled feet moving forward, his long robe swishing and swaying as he walked. Gonou realized that he should follow the priest or he'd be left behind. He realized that he was no longer Gonou, but Hakkai now. Dropping his hands to his sides, he stepped forward.
Sanzo led him through a maze of corridors, all filled with monks who bowed as Sanzo passed. Paying them no mind, he continued on, his footsteps echoing in the silence that preceded his approach. Gonou felt the averted eyes of the nameless, faceless monks on his back, on the bandage covering his right eye, on his hands clasped at his back.
Stopping at one of the doors that lined the long hall, Sanzo turned to a young attendant that had appeared at his elbow. “Bring us some food. And we are not to be disturbed.”
“Of course, Sanzo-sama,” the boy said, and hurried away. Sanzo stepped inside the room and Gonou followed.
The room was utilitarian, but the few decorative pieces were ornate and appeared very old. A large wooden desk dominated one wall, and a simple bed was tucked into the opposite corner. Sanzo went to sit in the spacious sill of the large window, which looked out over the temple garden. He lit a cigarette and closed his eyes for a moment before turning back to Gonou.
“I'll have them bring a futon for you later. You'll sleep here for the time being.”
“These are your quarters.”
“Yes.”
Gonou hovered in the middle of the room, unsure where to stand and what to say. Not Gonou, Hakkai now. He looked to Sanzo, smoking on the window sill casually. The smell of Sanzo's tobacco drifted lazily about the room. The silence hummed in Gonou's ears. Not Gonou, Hakkai.
“I didn't ask you to defend me,” Gonou said, and his voice reverberated through the quarters and sounded back into his ears, much louder than he had intended. The priest sat immobile, looking more like a beautiful holy statue than the caustic man who had vouched for his continued existence. The late afternoon sunlight shone through the window and caught exactly the right shades in Sanzo's hair to make it appear as a golden, ethereal light around the priest's head. He set his eyes on Gonou and exhaled, smoke streaming from his mouth and hanging in the air.
“No. You asked to be punished.”
“That's right.”
Sanzo looked him up and down, and Gonou felt himself stiffen under the inspection of his gaze. He snorted, his mouth turning into a sneer that smacked of disappointment. “'The worst possible punishment, as no true penance could ever fit my crimes', you said.”
“Yes.” Gonou squirmed, but did not break eye contact with the priest who had saved his miserable life.
“Speak to me again when you realize that you've been handed the worst possible sentence, and the only atonement fit for someone like you.”
Gonou started, opened his mouth but did not speak as the meaning of Sanzo's words hit him. He fell to his knees and regarded the priest above him, still perched on the window sill. Sanzo's face was grave, not capable of pity, but full of understanding.
“You mean-”
“You will live. You will live with what you have done and this alone will be the cruelest judgment I could ever inflict on you.”
***
Hakkai entered the private outdoor bath and nodded to the young attendant that had led him inside. He bowed and left silently. Hakkai stepped into the changing room and shed his borrowed clothes in favor of one of the light robes provided.
Fetching a towel, he slid open the door to the bath. Sanzo was alone, soaking in the small private pool. Moisture clung to his hair, making it flop into his face and cover his eyes. He looked as relaxed as Hakkai had ever seen him; in their shared time together, he had smoked casually and shared silence comfortably, but Hakkai hadn't seen him truly relax.
Hakkai quietly disrobed and slipped into the water, hissing at the near-scalding temperature. Sanzo opened his eyes and stirred on the other side of the bath. “I'm sorry if I disturbed you,” Hakkai said.
“I'm the one who sent for you.”
“True, though I'm not entirely certain why.”
Sanzo just grunted and rose until his chest and shoulders were visible above the surface of the water. Hakkai settled himself on a seat next to the priest and tried not to stare at Sanzo's muscular torso, glistening with sweat and steam.
“I wanted to talk to you. And I wanted a bath. That is all.”
Hakkai felt a smile rise his cheeks naturally, and found the effort required was minuscule. He was finding it easier everyday to slip into a smile. “I see. Well, I certainly won't complain, it's been ages since I've had a proper bath.”
“Mmm,” Sanzo hummed in response. He cupped his hands in the water and brought them up to pour over his face, the water running down his graceful features in rivulets. The next handful of water went over his chest and shoulders.
Hakkai coughed quietly, feeling as if he had intruded on Sanzo's privacy. “I'm somewhat surprised that you are the outdoor bath type, Sanzo. Such simple pleasures seem...”
“Seem what? Unfit for a priest?”
“Perhaps not unfit, just not ... exactly the type of activity one pictures a holy man enjoying.”
Sanzo snorted, and fixed his eyes on Hakkai. “You've got a lot to learn, Hakkai, if you think that indulging the body has anything to do with being a priest.”
“I suppose. Then again, I've learned that my preconceptions of priests have little to do with you, Sanzo.” Hakkai settled deeper into the water, stretching out his legs and arms. He sighed, letting the heat of the water and the steamy air wash over him.
He felt Sanzo's eyes on him, and found the priest staring at him intently. “I thought that you wanted to die,” Sanzo said.
“Curiously enough, it seems that whim has passed.”
“I see. You've cast off the conceits of Cho Gonou. Good.”
“Yes, I find I am learning more everyday about this man named Cho Hakkai. Are you surprised?”
“No. If I'd have thought you were too weak to begin life anew I would have killed you myself.”
Hakkai chuckled, sending small waves across the still water. “I suppose I should have expected that from you.” He smiled at the priest, and found it to be one of his easiest smiles.
Sanzo leaned forward, crossing the space between their bodies and kissed him. It wasn't a soft kiss, though the humid air made their lips slide against each other. It wasn't tentative, wasn't a question. Startled by the sudden gesture, Hakkai didn't resist or pull away, but opened his mouth to Sanzo's invading tongue. Grabbing the back of Hakkai's head, Sanzo smashed their mouthes together. Tongue thrust into Hakkai's mouth, Sanzo kissed him in earnest. Closing his eyes, Hakkai let himself be embraced, feeling the warmth of Sanzo's body against him. He let the sensations wash over him; he felt the heat of the steam in the air, the tight grip of Sanzo's fingers on his head, Sanzo's wet lips against his own.
When Sanzo pulled away, he kept his hold on Hakkai's head. He looked at Hakkai, satisfied. Hakkai felt his lips swell, felt the flush rising to his cheeks. He breathed heavily, head spinning with the heat and the sudden embrace.
“You're not one of those ridiculous people who believes that by ignoring and suppressing our physical desires they'll go away, are you?” Sanzo said, his voice low. He deliberately placed a hand on Hakkai's thigh and kneaded the sensitive skin with his fingers. “One who thinks that through piety, chastity and denial we magically gain enlightenment.”
Feeling his erection stirring at Sanzo's touch, Hakkai answered, “apparently not.”
“Good.”
This time, Hakkai let his tongue dance with Sanzo's when the priest kissed him. He slid his hands up to grip Sanzo's shoulders. When they broke apart again, Hakkai said, “I suppose I just never considered acting on such physical desires again.”
The hand that had held Hakkai's head travelled down past his neck and shoulders, touching lightly. Sanzo's fingers brushed over a nipple and Hakkai shuddered. “So, Cho Gonou preemptively doomed Cho Hakkai to celibacy.” Sanzo's fingers lingered at the other nipple and rubbed in circles around the sensitive, hardened nub.
“Not necessarily, though I had considered it.” Hakkai sighed, now fully erect. “I certainly never contemplated acting out my desires with a man, let alone the highest-ranking priest in Shangri-la and the man who saved my life.”
Abandoning Hakkai's nipple, Sanzo turned his attention to the deeply scarred flesh of his abdomen. He traced the outline of the scar lightly, hand dipping in and out of the water. Placing his hand flat against the ridged skin of Hakkai's stomach, Sanzo said, “aren't you the one who said he was learning new things about himself everyday?”
Sanzo's hand dipped lower, and without preamble he gripped Hakkai's cock. Hakkai gasped and his hips surged upward. “Sanzo! I-” Opening his eyes, Hakkai found Sanzo's trained on him. He stroked Hakkai's cock rhythmically while he watched Hakkai's reactions intently. Finding that he couldn't suppress it, Hakkai moaned and heard his voice, rising above the sound of the water, which rippled with every movement of Sanzo's hand.
Leaving Hakkai's cock for a moment, Sanzo wound his arms around Hakkai's slender hips. He pulled Hakkai up and toward him. Hakkai moved with him, eager to regain Sanzo's touch. Straddling Sanzo's thighs, Hakkai felt ridiculous and exposed, but soon was lost to the pleasure he felt when Sanzo resumed rubbing his cock. Hakkai reached out to grab the edge of the pool behind Sanzo's head for support, and ardently thrust his hips in time with Sanzo's hand.
Hakkai found Sanzo's cock with his other hand and hesitantly wrapped his fingers around the base. He took the rumbling sound from Sanzo's throat as encouragement, and began mimicking the rhythm that Sanzo set. The feeling of Sanzo's erection was foreign, but the sound of his breath coming in short bursts coupled with the excitement of Sanzo's hand on his own cock was exquisite.
“Hakkai,” Sanzo said, and grabbed his ass with his free hand. He squeezed firmly while he brushed his thumb across the ridge separating the base and head of Hakkai's cock. “This is your body, not Gonou's”
Sanzo thrust his hips up to meet Hakkai's hand. Hakkai tightened his grip on the priest and felt him grow harder.
“Setting aside the wish to die is not the same as living. This is your body, Hakkai, own it.” With that, Sanzo tightened his fist around the tip of his penis, and Hakkai came with a strangled cry.
Releasing him, Sanzo placed his hand on top of Hakkai's and moved them both up and down on his own cock. After a few quick strokes, Sanzo came, covering both of their hands. He shuddered underneath Hakkai, and let out his breath slowly.
Hakkai struggled to regain his breath in the stifling, saturated air of the bath. He glanced down at the water in between their bodies, and saw the glimmer of their come. He felt heat rise to his face as he realized he was sitting on Sanzo. He tried to raise himself from the priest, but Sanzo held him in place with the hand still firmly groping his ass.
“Sanzo?”
Sanzo looked him in the eye, and said, “You will live, Hakkai.”
Smiling effortlessly at Sanzo, Hakkai replied, “yes, yes I will.”
Nodding, Sanzo released him.