We Never Dance Alone : Chapter Eight : Final
Title: We Never Dance Alone
Rated: T
Genre : Drama / Angst / Friendship
Characters : Kangin ,Yesung & Leeteuk.
Warning: UNBETA-ED, F-words & Co., mindless whumpage of characters, possibly inaccurate medical jargon.
Summary : Since the accident, things had been spiraling out of control. Will things get any better for the boys?
On the 9th day mark of Kangin's successfully received transplant, the doctors had given him an all-clear to continue to recover at the comfort of his own home. He will still need close follow-up consultations with the doctors for another month or two, but that's nothing to be complained about. He was nothing but glad to finally be able to leave the hospital. Good riddance sucky hospital food.
But leaving the hospital means that he'll be away from Yesung, and that thought troubled him greatly.
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After much harassing and cajoling his manager, Kangin finally got what he wanted ; a ride down to the hospital so he can pay Yesung a visit.
When they arrived in front of Yesung's room, Kangin turned to his manager, nodding slightly assuring him that he would be okay on his own. The manager understood and respected their need to be alone, so he decided to wait down at the cafeteria.
The doctor had explained to Kangin earlier, that Yesung was still very weak and his condition hadn't improved any but surprisingly he had a good night last night and he's been awake and alert for most of the day.
He took a deep breath before entering the room and plastered a silly grin on his face.
"Hey.. Sungie.. " he touched Yesung's cheek lightly. You look better today." He lied. In terms of appearance, Yesung looked terrible, his face gaunt, his skin pallid and dark circles decorated his eyes.
"Hey..." Yesung replied quietly. His brows creased in confusion when he noticed that Kangin was no longer clad in hospital attire.
As if reading Yesung's mind, Kangin gave him a soft smile and explained. "I'm out of the hospital! I'm healing nicely as expected, so they allowed me to go home." He grinned awkwardly despite the guilty feeling brewing inside of him, knowing the situation should be reversed. Yesung wouldn't be lying sick on the hospital bed if it wasn't for him.
He cleared his throat uncomfortably and continued. "Oh! So.. I went back to the dorm yesterday, and I brought something for you to see. But you gotta close your eyes!"
"Close your eyes Jongwoon-ah!" Kangin ordered in his usual demanding tone.
Yesung wanted to hesitate at first, but he was too tired to even try, so he complied and closed his eyes.
Satisfied that the older man had closed his eyes as told, Kangin slowly placed the bulky bag he was carrying on the floor, carefully taking a little something out of the portable mini aquarium hidden in his bag.
"Okay, you can open your eyes now!"
When he opened his eyes he was greeted with a familiar looking pet turtle cupped protectively in Kangin's palm. "Ta-da! Ttangkoma misses you, so I thought I'd take him along for a visit." He smiled brightly hoping that the little gesture would lighten up Yesung's mood.
Yesung smiled weakly but genuinely up at Kangin, a warm feeling blossomed in his chest. "T-ttang-koma..." he reached out feebly to touch the reptile friend that he hadn't seen for so long. The urge to cry washed over him and he mentally scolded himself. Stop being such a baby Jongwoon!
"Youngwoon-ah...." he rasped. "T-thank you... I've missed him, I-I thought that everyone had forgotten about him. I was worried no one would feed him."
"Are you kidding? You should give Wookie some credit, he did a good job taking care of your turtle." He quipped, but then suddenly lowering his voice "Can I keep him now?" His eyes darted towards the door, worried that a nurse or a doctor might randomly come in. "They're going to chew on my ass if they find out about this!"
Yesung gave a slight nod, the short reunion with his Ttangkoma was more than enough, relieved to know his pet is still being taken well cared of. Thanks Wookie... "T-thanks Youngwoon-ah... I appreciate it... It must have been troublesome for you..." he said softly, he couldn’t generate enough energy to make his voice louder.
Kangin tightened his lips into a thin smile and ruffled Yesung's hair. "This was no problem at all." Nothing compared to what you've done for me. He thought sadly.
The small excitement left Yesung feeling exhausted and he's starting to feel a little off, but he tried to push away the feeling.
Their little moment ended with an awkward silence. Both men had so much to say but nothing came out. Yesung was too tired to talk. Just breathing was hard enough. Holding up a decent conversation would be almost impossible, and Kangin was just too caught up with the jumbled mess of emotions running through his head.
Kangin tried to steer away from the touchy subject, he didn't want to ruin the atmosphere, but damn it, Kangin and his big mouth. The words rolled off his tongue before he could stop it.
"Jongwoon-ah.. why? You could have avoided all this, you could be doing the things you love right now, singing, performing, not lying here in an unnecessary mess like this! " The familiar tremor laced his voice as sudden tears gathered in his eyes. The light atmosphere turned dark and solemn.
He couldn't understand why people keep questioning his actions and decisions when the reason is crystal clear. "B-because...we're...family.. aren't we? We are...Super Junior...aren't we are all brothers? We never dance alone...we...we dance together...not matter w-whatw-we help each o-other....r-right..? His words came at random intervals caused by his stuttered breaths.
The other man scrubbed his hands over his face trying to rid the burning feeling in his eyes. He understood. But refused to accept. "Fuck! But look at this! Look at you!" Anger and despair mixed and burned like fire in his chest. "I don't know what I'd do if anything happens to you Jongwoon-ah!" There- he said it.
"I-I know you're m-mad, If I were you... I think I might be mad too... but I...did...what I had to..." God, he was so freaking tired and breathing was becoming such an effort, but he had to finish, he had to let Kangin know this. "I dont want to die Youngwoon, but if I'm going to.. I want you to know... that I don't regret my decision..." he paused to catch his breath. "Never did and never will." his voice quavered so much that by logic it would be almost hard for Kangin to understand. Except that Kangin was able to understand it all. And it hit him like a bullet through his heart that leaves a gaping hole.
Yesung sighed, but it sounded more like a wheeze. " I-I'd..do it again in a heart beat if I have to Youngwoon-ah... " Tears leaked from the corner of his eyes. Emotions hit him easy nowadays especially with his weakened condition. He couldn't hold back the tears, he felt so defeated and helpless. His energy suddenly disappearing and his vision slowly graying.
Kangin fell into silence. Yesung's words left his mind reeling in chaos. He had to look away from Yesung. Suddenly it was too much for him to handle. He swallowed a sob and scrubbed his hands over his face before straightening to his full height. Placing his hand on Yesung's, he gave it a light squeeze. "Rest Jongwoon-ah... I'll be back tomorrow, manager hyung is waiting for me at the cafeteria anyways." He paused. He didn't want to leave Yesung yet, but he felt that it was necessary at that time. He couldn't let Yesung watch him crumble. "Have a good rest and feel better tomorrow." He encouraged before turning his heels quietly towards the door leaving the other man to dwell in his on thoughts.
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His schedule had taken up most of his day, but that didn't stop him from coming down to the hospital. He walked through the familiar plain off-white hallway of the hospital, heading towards Yesung's room.
He entered the room cautiously and was halted by the stillness in the air .He noticed a heart monitor now stood beside Yesung's bed, switched on and attached to the man lying on the bed. They must have hooked him on the machine while he was away, he thought to himself.
It's a clear sign that Yesung's health was further deteriorating.
Labored breathing echoed loudly through the dimly lit room. Yesung's breathing was harsh, grating as he worked to take in air and push it back out again. Leeteuk had no idea why the medical personnel had decided to put him back on a nasal canula when Yesung clearly was working hard to breathe.
Leeteuk eased himself heavily down onto the chair beside the bed. Yesung's skin glistened with fever induced sweat. Tiny wheezing sounds were coming from his colorless lips, his face was still pale and flushed.
"Sungie-ah..." He reached for the damp cloth on the bedside and leaned over the bed, running the cool cloth against Yesung's hot skin, causing the sick young man to flinch away and whimper as the coolness made contact with his heat radiated skin.
Yesung's fever-glazed eyes opened to a mere slits, looking disoriented. "H-hhyung... w-where am I? he mumbled incoherently.
His heart shattered. Yesung's voice sounded so small, so unsure, so innocently young. He must be really ill to become this confused and disoriented. Leeteuk tried his best to keep his voice steady. "Shhh... Sungie-ah it's okay you're in the hospital." He reached out to push Yesung's wet bangs to the side, running the cool cloth on his forehead, his fevered breath felt so hot against Leeteuk's wrist.
"H-hospital?..." His face contorted into further confusion."W-w-want to go h-home..." he wheezed out.
"Soon Sungie..soon, when you're better, you can go home...okay? But you gotta be strong and fight this..and get better..." He cooed, as if he was talking to a young child.
Yesung eyes drifted closed again, but he managed a small slight nod and he continue to mumble. "Y-Youngwoon..tell...tell him...'m sorry I was l-late..d-ddidn't mean to..." He slurred, his words becoming increasingly incomprehensible.
Leeteuk didn't know what Yesung was on about, but he played along. "Okay Sungie.. I'll tell him, but you gotta promise me that you'll get better soon okay?" Yesung didn't reply, his puffy eyes closed, his face relaxed somewhat. He must have drifted back to sleep.
For a few second, he studied his sleeping friend. A sudden realization crashed upon him. Sure, he had a good relationship with Yesung. But he never really had a chance to treat and protect Yesung like he does to his other donsaengs. It's not that he never wanted to, it's just that Yesung had always been able to take care of himself, always able to handle the things that had been thrown at him on his own. Sometimes the members would turn to Yesung with their problems, but he wondered if Yesung had anyone to turn to.
Teukie, you're supposed to be aware of this things! He berated himself mentally. But then again, it's really hard to realize things like this when you have eleven other people to watch out for.
"I'm sorry Sungie-ah, when you get better, I'll make it up to you, we'll spend more time together.
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A shrill warning noise screamed through the silence, jolting Leeteuk from his restless nap. His head shot up, hazy mind trying to figure out where the piercing sound came from, but his brain failed to register what was going on around him. He barely managed to register the erratic line on the heart monitor screen attached to his friend before he felt himself gently move away towards the corner of the room. Medical staff flooded in, and then room exploded into sudden flurry of activity.
And realization hit him like a brick. His eyes snapped open wide, the sleepy feeling that was engulfing him disappeared immediately.
Yesung!
He had been in Yesung's room, and the unsettling sound must have came from the heart monitor he was hooked on. His breath caught in his chest, and his heart slammed wildly against his ribs. "Oh no, Sungie!"
He stood near the doorway helplessly, watching the chaos before him. This can't be real. He blinked a few times to confirm the image before him, making sure that he wasn't dreaming.
"His blood pressure is bottoming out, doctor!!" One of the nurse called out.
"We're losing his pulse!" Another female voice added sternly in the middle of the ruckus.
"Start manual compression!" The tall mysterious looking doctor ordered. One of the medical technician spurred into action, placing an ambu bag over Yesung's nose and mouth forcing air into his lungs "Get the crash cart here stat! He's going to arrest!"
And he did. The steady monotonous tone that came from the heart monitor indicates that Kim Jongwoon's heart had stopped struggling to beat.
"Shit! The doctor cursed. "Push another mg of atropine and don't stop with the compression!" The doctor's tone no longer calm, worried that his young patient might actually lose his life this time around.
"He's in V-Fib!" The doctor glanced at the heart monitor upon hearing one of his assistant's comment. "Give me the cardiac needle and get the damn paddles now" The doctor inserted the needle directly into Yesung's heart with hopes that it would solve the current problem. He glanced up at the heart monitor to confirm any changes.
"He's not responding doc!" A voice said in an almost defeated fashion.
"Come on, Yesung-sshi!" The doctor muttered to himself, not willing to lose the young man's life. "Charge the paddles to 250! Clear!" He ordered and applied the defibrillator paddle to Yesung's exposed chest delivering an electrical charge to his heart. He watched Yesung's thin frame lurched upwards as the electrical shock flowed into his body. The doctor checked on the monitor again. "Damn it! Charge to 300! Clear!
Leeteuk screwed his eyes shut at the sight of his friend's frail form lurching off the bed. Another sight that he won't be able to forget for the rest of his life.
"We got him back doc! But his pulse is weak." The doctor lets out a sigh of relief. "Good job Yesung-sshi, good job..." He said silently as he patted the young man's arm. "Get him prepped to be moved up to the ICU, and draw out some of his blood. I need to run a few more tests."
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The tall mysterious looking doctor finally made his appearance. Walking towards the two men, he didn’t look forward to delivering the news regarding his patient.
As soon as Kangin saw the familiar doctor, he rose to his feet, followed by Leeteuk. Worry lines obvious on their young tired faces. "How is he?" They asked in unison.
"Have a seat Leeteuk-sshi, Kangin-sshi." The doctor motioned towards the bench. "Right now Yesung-sshi is in a semi-comatose state." He heard Leeteuk gasped at his statement.
"I know that this is a lot to take, especially after everything that had been going on with Yesung-sshi." he offered his deepest sympathy. "With the infection and pneumonia raging his body, Yesung-sshi eventually went into septic shock. We're trying to keep things within our control, but at this rate there's not much we can do but to let the medication run it's course. We've administered stronger antibiotics for him and because of his weakened lungs we've put him on the ventilator to support his breathing" The doctor tried his best to keep his tone professional.
"Is he going to be okay?" Leeteuk interjected.
The doctor hesitated for a moment. "The mortality rate for septic shock is high. Yesung-sshi is young, but his body has been through a lot since the accident. I'm concerned that his heart might be showing early signs of failure. We are already giving him medication for that.
If he doesn't respond to the medication, he might be facing multiple organ failure and eventually fall into a full comatose state. And when that happens, there's nothing much we can do, he will be depending on life support until-"
A surge of anger washed over him like a hot wave of fury. No.! he's not dying! He's not! Kangin yelled. He can't die! You gotta do something! anything!"
"Leeteuk sshi, Kangin sshi... " The doctor continued, his tone was calm and practiced. "We've done all we can for him, and we will definitely continue to assist him aggressively in this fight. But please understand that his body is just too weak-"
For the second time Kangin cuts off the doctor before he could finish. "No! I don't want to hear it! You do what you need to do! Don't give me this bullshit!" Kangin looked like he was about to charge at the innocent doctor, but Leeteuk held him in place, telling him to calm down. "Youngwoon-ah, it's not gonna make things any better if you take it out on the doctor, he's only doing his job."
"I'm sorry.I wish there was a better news for the both you." The doctor truly was sorry. "You can see him if you wish, he's settled in the ICU. Keep talking to him, encourage him, it would be a good help for him." he encouraged. "I'll make sure to grant you all-time access to be with Yesung-sshi in his ICU room." The doctor then gave them a small bow before turning away.
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Both men quietly entered the room. The sight before them robbed their breath away.
Kangin's steps stopped dead as he allowed himself to take in Yesung's full appearance. His eyes were closed and his skin was almost as white as the sheets. Series of wires and more tubes attached to his body, running beneath the hospital gown. The heart monitor beeps quietly beside the bed, a blood pressure cuff wrapped around his left arm and a pulse oximeter attached to his finger. Yesung seems to be attached to every medical equipment available. But none of them were as disturbing as the plastic tube threaded down Yesung's throat, delivering air into his lungs mechanically.
He looked perfectly peaceful, almost as if he was sleeping soundly.
Acidic bile begin to bubble at the back of his throat. Kangin couldn’t help but think that it should have been him lying in that bed instead of Yesung.
Unable to contain his emotion, he tore away his gaze from Yesung's too still form and made a hasty exit out of the room, his feet led him towards the fire escape located at the end of the hallway.
"Damn it!" he screamed, banging his fist on the wall, taking out his anger on the painted cement. Tears pouring uncontrollably down his face. "God damn it!" He hit the wall once more, leaned his back against it, and sunk down to the linoleum floor. The doctor's words kept ringing in his head. Yesung is dying, and it's all because of him. Yesung would have never been placed in this position if it wasn't for him. "Jongwoon-ah... I don't know how I'm going to face another day if anything happens to you." He brought his hands to his face, sobbing uncontrollably.
The heavy doors of the fire escape creaked open. "Kangin-ah.." Leeteuk walked towards Kangin. Kneeling down beside the younger man, he placed his hand on Kangin's shoulder, the man didn't shy away from his touch.
Kangin trembled as the sobs became more pronounced. "Teuk hyung... I did this to him! I can't do this anymore hyung.. I can't...It hurts a lot..it hurts too much to even look at him."
Leeteuk's heart broke along with Kangin's.
"You have no idea how many times I feel the need to take it out on everyone Youngwoon-ah! Run away, stop coming to the hospital just so I don't have to see him suffer like this. You have no idea Youngwoon-ah...My heart pained for both of you, and Jongwoon.. he kept getting worse under my watch... how am I supposed to feel ? How..? But I thought about him, about what he's done, I realize I have to be strong for him too. He needs us to be strong too.
"I'm not as strong as you think hyung! I'm not!" Kangin didn't care anymore that he's crying like a baby.
Leeteuk stared at Kangin's pained eyes, "Who said that you were strong? Just because you're "Kangin" you're supposed to be okay when your friend's fighting for his life? I'm not strong too, but I have to be Kangin, we have to be strong...for his sake..."
"Youngwoon-ah, he never gave up on you , you can't give up on him...especially not now. He's going to get through this, he just needs us to have faith in him." .Leeteuk couldn’t let Kangin hear any doubt in his voice.
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The ICU was unearthly quiet aside from the steady click and whoosh of air coming from Yesung’s ventilator and the incessant beeping of the heart monitor. Sitting next to Yesung's bed watching the mechanical rise and fall of his chest was especially painful for him.
Exhaustion was beginning to take a toll on him. His emotions were all over the place and it was making him dizzy. Kangin sniffed loudly, mouth trembling and tears spilling down his face.
"Jongwoon-ah... you have got to bounce out of this, fight! I know you must be really tired by now...but, quitting is not an option. Our Yesung never quits on anything, and you can't start now." He paused in attempt to steady his voice. "Take your time ..but just...just come back to us okay? Everyone misses you.." He choked back a sob.
"I know... I've said things to hurt you, my actions towards you...they might be too much. I-I just want you to know I never meant to hurt you, it's just... that you're too cute when you get teased." He stifled an awkward laugh, an effort to make himself feel slightly better. "But I'm sorry Jongwoon-ah, I'm sorry for not being there for you...I'm sorry for taking you for granted! I'm sorry for what I've said before we had gotten into this hell of a mess. I didn't mean them." More tears spilled down,his face red from crying. "I wish I could turn back time and change things...but I can't." It was getting harder to talk, his head feels heavy and his heart aches too much. He once again felt grief tugging at him, piercing through his being. "I-i have nothing to give you Jongwoon-ah.. I don't know how to fix this..."
He sat silently for a few minutes just staring at Yesung's slack face. He wanted to say more, but it was almost time for him to leave. His manager would pop by any minute to take him home, there's no way in hell he'd let his manager see him like this.
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Yesung's condition had been bouncing around, almost as if teasing them, keeping them on the edges of their seats. His health would improve greatly, but only to plummet down back into danger zone later on. Yesung's body still fought the infection that seemed to be gripping him like a vice, showing no signs of letting up. Leeteuk and Kangin were told by one of the doctors that Yesung's heart might not be able to handle the strain anymore. And that they might need to prepare themselves, seeing that the young man might lose his battle anytime. Both Leeteuk and Kangin had been worried and angry at the doctors words. But they wouldn't buy it. They refuse to believe it.
Leeteuk found himself nodding off in the chair. Opening his eyes, he looked around blearily around the room and frowned at the sight of Kangin's uncomfortable form snoring lightly in the plastic chair across him. He moved his attention on Yesung, watching for any signs of distress or wakefulness.
"Sungie-ah.. you're trying to give this old man a heart attack? You never really had gotten yourself into any trouble all these years. But this time you made your point.. you can be quite a toublemaker." He laughed to himself softly. You have got-"
His soft ramblings were intterupted by the presence of the tall mysterious looking doctor. Leeteuk had to admit, he was more comfortable with this particular doctor.
They greeted each other lightly as the doctor carried on with the routine check up on his patient. "He's doing much better today, his oxygen levels are better too. I'm going to see about weaning him off the ventilator and replacing it with a normal oxygen mask. He's been showing steady signs of improvement these past few days." The doctor nodded, satisfied with his patient's improvement.
"Really?" Leeteuk asked wide eyed. His eyes shining with tears.
The doctor nodded once more. "He's a fighter Leeteuk-sshi. His body had gone through so much, it was unimaginable. And yet he's still here. He's fighting hard, and I'm sure he'll bounce back from this soon." He kept his voice low, minding the other sleeping man in the room.
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He was sure that he was hearing voices. But they were so muffled and unclear to him. He tried to open his eyes slowly, but screwed them shut again as the intruding bright light pierced his vision.
"H-h-hyung? Y-y-youngwoon? he called out breathlessly, his own voice muffled. His eyes searched around under the half-mast, hoping to see the familiar faces.
"Jongwoon!" "Sungie!" Kangin and Leeteuk pretty much jumped towards the bed the second they heard Yesung's weak voice.
A big smile plastered across Kangin's face, his hand moved to brush back Yesung's hair. "You're awake!" He exclaimed, tone filled with mixed emotions.
"I'll get the doctor!" Leeteuk called out in excitement.
"Y-youngwoon..." Yesung reached for the oxygen mask , trying to rid the obstruction over his mouth and nose. But Kangin was quick to stop Yesung's sluggish hand. "You need it.. leave it.."
The other man's face contorted in confusion, not actually sure what's happening around him.
“You're awake I see." another voice interrupted, seemingly out of nowhere. "Yesung-sshi, I’m going to check your pressure okay?” Yesung nodded slightly despite his confusion. When the doctor was done, he continued to assess his patient, making sure everything else is alright.
The doctor turned towards the other two men standing behind him. Both eager to know if their friend is finally turning for the better. "I'm happy to inform you that his blood pressure is finally up along with his other vital signs. Both of his lungs sounded good too. It seems that Yesung-sshi is finally coming out of this." His face displayed a satisfying smile. "I'll be ordering more blood work test and run other precaution examinations to make sure that everything is where it should be. We'll be bringing him up for the tests as soon as he is more alert.
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Another week and a few health scares later, the doctors finally agreed that Yesung was finally on the mend and out of any danger. The pneumonia that ravaged his lungs cleared up and the infection defeated with the continuous strong antibiotics administered. Both Leeteuk and Kangin were finally able to breathe easier upon the good news.
With his health steadily improving, Yesung's face gained back some of the color that he had been lacking for weeks, his mood became better and he slowly beginning to go back to his own self.
The boys would come and visit him every now and then, accompanying him, making sure that he wouldn't succumb to the plague of boredom. Everything was slowly coming back to the way it was.
"Jongwoon-ah..." Kangin shifted in his seat uncomfortably and Yesung gave him a pointed glance.
"What is it?" His eyebrows creased at his friend's tone.
"I... I just... uh... thanks for saving my life Jongwoon-ah!" He blurted out and heaved a sigh. "Even after all I've done and said... I don't know what I'd-" His words cut off mid-sentence. Yesung knew what Kangin was going to say and he knew how hard it could be for Kangin to be pouring his heart out on the still sore subject.
"It's okay Youngwoon-ah, you don't need to say it. I understand." An honest smile forming on his face. "What matters now is that everything is going to be fine."
"No. What matters now is that you're fine and I can finally sleep soundly now! Hell everyone can finally sleep soundly now!" Kangin grinned.
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Today was going to be the day Yesung would be finally be released from the hospital. Everyone was excited and happy to have Yesung released from the hospital ; especially for Kangin and Leeteuk who came to the hospital early in the morning to bring Yesung back to their dorm.
Having gathered up Yesung's belongings, Kangin helped Yesung with getting dressed into fresh clothes. It was a difficult task to accomplish, but after some soft bantering between the two, they managed. Walking down the hall was another big task that Yesung had to face as he refused the wheelchair. Both Kangin and Leeteuk shared an incredulous glance at Yesung's determination, but they decided to let the man have it his way. They settled by walking by his side, just in case.
The walk from Yesung's room down to the hospital entrance took longer than expected as they made a few stops whenever Yesung's legs were about to give out. But the man never gave up, he'd get back to his feet stubbornly and trudged on.
"Take it easy Jongwoon-ah! You're going to wear yourself out and you'll end up checking in back to your room!" Kangin said jokingly although he realized that if that really happened, it wouldn't be a laughing matter.
Yesung looked up to Kangin and flashed him a smile, his breath panting a little. "It's okay Youngwoon-ah. I'm fine. This is exhausting, but I'm good." Kangin ignored the man's reply and rolled his eyes. He then realized the chilly morning temperature. Pulling the scarf off himself, he quickly placed the scarf around Yesung's neck, adjusting it in place, making sure it would do it's job keeping the older man warm. "You gotta stay warm, you can't risk getting a cold."
A black van then pulled up a few yards away from them. Their ride is here. Another short flight of stairs, and there's the van waiting to bring them home.
Before Yesung could say anything, Kangin scooped Yesung into his strong arms and carried the smaller man down the short set of staircase, and then towards the van. Kangin's action startled him. He latched onto Kangin automatically , but gladly accepted the help his friend offered.
"Youngwoon-ah, I'm not invalid!" Yesung whined.
"Oh quiet you, Jongwoon... I'm saving your butt from face planting on the concrete." he retorted in playful exasperation as he loaded Yesung carefully into the van.
Leeteuk couldn't help but smile at the two.
With all of them settled safely inside the van, the vehicle rolled into motion. Destination : home.
Kangin glanced over and saw that Yesung had his head resting against the window with his eyes closed. Kangin could tell by the even steady breaths that Yesung had fallen asleep. The walk down to the hospital entrance must have exhaust his recovering body out. Kangin smiled to himself. That's what you get for being a stubborn brat. Leaning his head against Yesung's shoulder, Kangin too fell asleep.
They still had a long way to go before Yesung would be back in perfect condition. There are so much issues that they need to fix amongst themselves. But the fact that he was back was enough for Leeteuk to finally sigh in total relief. Yesung was getting better and no longer in any danger. He couldn't ask for more. Glancing at his two donsaengs sleeping comfortably, he closed his eyes.
Thank you god.
Things are finally looking up.
Despite all the hardships they had gone through for the past weeks, they all pulled through alright. Together.
THE END.
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Finally! And... I thought the chapter before this was hard to write ~_~. This chapter pretty much burnt my fried brain to crisp. This chapter took me awhile, I kept starting over, and ugh! I couldn't piece them together the way I want it to. The ending was a bit rushed as I had to take out a lot from what I had originally wrote. It was a mess; and still is.
I struggled a lot towards the end because it was so hard for me to conclude the story. (As I tend to go on and on and on) Plus, it was so hard to fix Yesung. I guess I only know how to break him =( I hope you guys will enjoy this anyways. I would also like to thank everyone who followed this fic. Especially to those who had been reading from the very first chapter. THANK YOU. Thanks to EVERYONE who stopped by to read any of these chapters, silent readers or not.
Once I get back from Daegu, I'll be starting on a new fic. With any luck, I hope to see you kind people on the next ride.
Stay safe and healthy always<3
Rated: T
Genre : Drama / Angst / Friendship
Characters : Kangin ,Yesung & Leeteuk.
Warning: UNBETA-ED, F-words & Co., mindless whumpage of characters, possibly inaccurate medical jargon.
Summary : Since the accident, things had been spiraling out of control. Will things get any better for the boys?
On the 9th day mark of Kangin's successfully received transplant, the doctors had given him an all-clear to continue to recover at the comfort of his own home. He will still need close follow-up consultations with the doctors for another month or two, but that's nothing to be complained about. He was nothing but glad to finally be able to leave the hospital. Good riddance sucky hospital food.
But leaving the hospital means that he'll be away from Yesung, and that thought troubled him greatly.
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After much harassing and cajoling his manager, Kangin finally got what he wanted ; a ride down to the hospital so he can pay Yesung a visit.
When they arrived in front of Yesung's room, Kangin turned to his manager, nodding slightly assuring him that he would be okay on his own. The manager understood and respected their need to be alone, so he decided to wait down at the cafeteria.
The doctor had explained to Kangin earlier, that Yesung was still very weak and his condition hadn't improved any but surprisingly he had a good night last night and he's been awake and alert for most of the day.
He took a deep breath before entering the room and plastered a silly grin on his face.
"Hey.. Sungie.. " he touched Yesung's cheek lightly. You look better today." He lied. In terms of appearance, Yesung looked terrible, his face gaunt, his skin pallid and dark circles decorated his eyes.
"Hey..." Yesung replied quietly. His brows creased in confusion when he noticed that Kangin was no longer clad in hospital attire.
As if reading Yesung's mind, Kangin gave him a soft smile and explained. "I'm out of the hospital! I'm healing nicely as expected, so they allowed me to go home." He grinned awkwardly despite the guilty feeling brewing inside of him, knowing the situation should be reversed. Yesung wouldn't be lying sick on the hospital bed if it wasn't for him.
He cleared his throat uncomfortably and continued. "Oh! So.. I went back to the dorm yesterday, and I brought something for you to see. But you gotta close your eyes!"
"Close your eyes Jongwoon-ah!" Kangin ordered in his usual demanding tone.
Yesung wanted to hesitate at first, but he was too tired to even try, so he complied and closed his eyes.
Satisfied that the older man had closed his eyes as told, Kangin slowly placed the bulky bag he was carrying on the floor, carefully taking a little something out of the portable mini aquarium hidden in his bag.
"Okay, you can open your eyes now!"
When he opened his eyes he was greeted with a familiar looking pet turtle cupped protectively in Kangin's palm. "Ta-da! Ttangkoma misses you, so I thought I'd take him along for a visit." He smiled brightly hoping that the little gesture would lighten up Yesung's mood.
Yesung smiled weakly but genuinely up at Kangin, a warm feeling blossomed in his chest. "T-ttang-koma..." he reached out feebly to touch the reptile friend that he hadn't seen for so long. The urge to cry washed over him and he mentally scolded himself. Stop being such a baby Jongwoon!
"Youngwoon-ah...." he rasped. "T-thank you... I've missed him, I-I thought that everyone had forgotten about him. I was worried no one would feed him."
"Are you kidding? You should give Wookie some credit, he did a good job taking care of your turtle." He quipped, but then suddenly lowering his voice "Can I keep him now?" His eyes darted towards the door, worried that a nurse or a doctor might randomly come in. "They're going to chew on my ass if they find out about this!"
Yesung gave a slight nod, the short reunion with his Ttangkoma was more than enough, relieved to know his pet is still being taken well cared of. Thanks Wookie... "T-thanks Youngwoon-ah... I appreciate it... It must have been troublesome for you..." he said softly, he couldn’t generate enough energy to make his voice louder.
Kangin tightened his lips into a thin smile and ruffled Yesung's hair. "This was no problem at all." Nothing compared to what you've done for me. He thought sadly.
The small excitement left Yesung feeling exhausted and he's starting to feel a little off, but he tried to push away the feeling.
Their little moment ended with an awkward silence. Both men had so much to say but nothing came out. Yesung was too tired to talk. Just breathing was hard enough. Holding up a decent conversation would be almost impossible, and Kangin was just too caught up with the jumbled mess of emotions running through his head.
Kangin tried to steer away from the touchy subject, he didn't want to ruin the atmosphere, but damn it, Kangin and his big mouth. The words rolled off his tongue before he could stop it.
"Jongwoon-ah.. why? You could have avoided all this, you could be doing the things you love right now, singing, performing, not lying here in an unnecessary mess like this! " The familiar tremor laced his voice as sudden tears gathered in his eyes. The light atmosphere turned dark and solemn.
He couldn't understand why people keep questioning his actions and decisions when the reason is crystal clear. "B-because...we're...family.. aren't we? We are...Super Junior...aren't we are all brothers? We never dance alone...we...we dance together...not matter w-whatw-we help each o-other....r-right..? His words came at random intervals caused by his stuttered breaths.
The other man scrubbed his hands over his face trying to rid the burning feeling in his eyes. He understood. But refused to accept. "Fuck! But look at this! Look at you!" Anger and despair mixed and burned like fire in his chest. "I don't know what I'd do if anything happens to you Jongwoon-ah!" There- he said it.
"I-I know you're m-mad, If I were you... I think I might be mad too... but I...did...what I had to..." God, he was so freaking tired and breathing was becoming such an effort, but he had to finish, he had to let Kangin know this. "I dont want to die Youngwoon, but if I'm going to.. I want you to know... that I don't regret my decision..." he paused to catch his breath. "Never did and never will." his voice quavered so much that by logic it would be almost hard for Kangin to understand. Except that Kangin was able to understand it all. And it hit him like a bullet through his heart that leaves a gaping hole.
Yesung sighed, but it sounded more like a wheeze. " I-I'd..do it again in a heart beat if I have to Youngwoon-ah... " Tears leaked from the corner of his eyes. Emotions hit him easy nowadays especially with his weakened condition. He couldn't hold back the tears, he felt so defeated and helpless. His energy suddenly disappearing and his vision slowly graying.
Kangin fell into silence. Yesung's words left his mind reeling in chaos. He had to look away from Yesung. Suddenly it was too much for him to handle. He swallowed a sob and scrubbed his hands over his face before straightening to his full height. Placing his hand on Yesung's, he gave it a light squeeze. "Rest Jongwoon-ah... I'll be back tomorrow, manager hyung is waiting for me at the cafeteria anyways." He paused. He didn't want to leave Yesung yet, but he felt that it was necessary at that time. He couldn't let Yesung watch him crumble. "Have a good rest and feel better tomorrow." He encouraged before turning his heels quietly towards the door leaving the other man to dwell in his on thoughts.
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His schedule had taken up most of his day, but that didn't stop him from coming down to the hospital. He walked through the familiar plain off-white hallway of the hospital, heading towards Yesung's room.
He entered the room cautiously and was halted by the stillness in the air .He noticed a heart monitor now stood beside Yesung's bed, switched on and attached to the man lying on the bed. They must have hooked him on the machine while he was away, he thought to himself.
It's a clear sign that Yesung's health was further deteriorating.
Labored breathing echoed loudly through the dimly lit room. Yesung's breathing was harsh, grating as he worked to take in air and push it back out again. Leeteuk had no idea why the medical personnel had decided to put him back on a nasal canula when Yesung clearly was working hard to breathe.
Leeteuk eased himself heavily down onto the chair beside the bed. Yesung's skin glistened with fever induced sweat. Tiny wheezing sounds were coming from his colorless lips, his face was still pale and flushed.
"Sungie-ah..." He reached for the damp cloth on the bedside and leaned over the bed, running the cool cloth against Yesung's hot skin, causing the sick young man to flinch away and whimper as the coolness made contact with his heat radiated skin.
Yesung's fever-glazed eyes opened to a mere slits, looking disoriented. "H-hhyung... w-where am I? he mumbled incoherently.
His heart shattered. Yesung's voice sounded so small, so unsure, so innocently young. He must be really ill to become this confused and disoriented. Leeteuk tried his best to keep his voice steady. "Shhh... Sungie-ah it's okay you're in the hospital." He reached out to push Yesung's wet bangs to the side, running the cool cloth on his forehead, his fevered breath felt so hot against Leeteuk's wrist.
"H-hospital?..." His face contorted into further confusion."W-w-want to go h-home..." he wheezed out.
"Soon Sungie..soon, when you're better, you can go home...okay? But you gotta be strong and fight this..and get better..." He cooed, as if he was talking to a young child.
Yesung eyes drifted closed again, but he managed a small slight nod and he continue to mumble. "Y-Youngwoon..tell...tell him...'m sorry I was l-late..d-ddidn't mean to..." He slurred, his words becoming increasingly incomprehensible.
Leeteuk didn't know what Yesung was on about, but he played along. "Okay Sungie.. I'll tell him, but you gotta promise me that you'll get better soon okay?" Yesung didn't reply, his puffy eyes closed, his face relaxed somewhat. He must have drifted back to sleep.
For a few second, he studied his sleeping friend. A sudden realization crashed upon him. Sure, he had a good relationship with Yesung. But he never really had a chance to treat and protect Yesung like he does to his other donsaengs. It's not that he never wanted to, it's just that Yesung had always been able to take care of himself, always able to handle the things that had been thrown at him on his own. Sometimes the members would turn to Yesung with their problems, but he wondered if Yesung had anyone to turn to.
Teukie, you're supposed to be aware of this things! He berated himself mentally. But then again, it's really hard to realize things like this when you have eleven other people to watch out for.
"I'm sorry Sungie-ah, when you get better, I'll make it up to you, we'll spend more time together.
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A shrill warning noise screamed through the silence, jolting Leeteuk from his restless nap. His head shot up, hazy mind trying to figure out where the piercing sound came from, but his brain failed to register what was going on around him. He barely managed to register the erratic line on the heart monitor screen attached to his friend before he felt himself gently move away towards the corner of the room. Medical staff flooded in, and then room exploded into sudden flurry of activity.
And realization hit him like a brick. His eyes snapped open wide, the sleepy feeling that was engulfing him disappeared immediately.
Yesung!
He had been in Yesung's room, and the unsettling sound must have came from the heart monitor he was hooked on. His breath caught in his chest, and his heart slammed wildly against his ribs. "Oh no, Sungie!"
He stood near the doorway helplessly, watching the chaos before him. This can't be real. He blinked a few times to confirm the image before him, making sure that he wasn't dreaming.
"His blood pressure is bottoming out, doctor!!" One of the nurse called out.
"We're losing his pulse!" Another female voice added sternly in the middle of the ruckus.
"Start manual compression!" The tall mysterious looking doctor ordered. One of the medical technician spurred into action, placing an ambu bag over Yesung's nose and mouth forcing air into his lungs "Get the crash cart here stat! He's going to arrest!"
And he did. The steady monotonous tone that came from the heart monitor indicates that Kim Jongwoon's heart had stopped struggling to beat.
"Shit! The doctor cursed. "Push another mg of atropine and don't stop with the compression!" The doctor's tone no longer calm, worried that his young patient might actually lose his life this time around.
"He's in V-Fib!" The doctor glanced at the heart monitor upon hearing one of his assistant's comment. "Give me the cardiac needle and get the damn paddles now" The doctor inserted the needle directly into Yesung's heart with hopes that it would solve the current problem. He glanced up at the heart monitor to confirm any changes.
"He's not responding doc!" A voice said in an almost defeated fashion.
"Come on, Yesung-sshi!" The doctor muttered to himself, not willing to lose the young man's life. "Charge the paddles to 250! Clear!" He ordered and applied the defibrillator paddle to Yesung's exposed chest delivering an electrical charge to his heart. He watched Yesung's thin frame lurched upwards as the electrical shock flowed into his body. The doctor checked on the monitor again. "Damn it! Charge to 300! Clear!
Leeteuk screwed his eyes shut at the sight of his friend's frail form lurching off the bed. Another sight that he won't be able to forget for the rest of his life.
"We got him back doc! But his pulse is weak." The doctor lets out a sigh of relief. "Good job Yesung-sshi, good job..." He said silently as he patted the young man's arm. "Get him prepped to be moved up to the ICU, and draw out some of his blood. I need to run a few more tests."
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The tall mysterious looking doctor finally made his appearance. Walking towards the two men, he didn’t look forward to delivering the news regarding his patient.
As soon as Kangin saw the familiar doctor, he rose to his feet, followed by Leeteuk. Worry lines obvious on their young tired faces. "How is he?" They asked in unison.
"Have a seat Leeteuk-sshi, Kangin-sshi." The doctor motioned towards the bench. "Right now Yesung-sshi is in a semi-comatose state." He heard Leeteuk gasped at his statement.
"I know that this is a lot to take, especially after everything that had been going on with Yesung-sshi." he offered his deepest sympathy. "With the infection and pneumonia raging his body, Yesung-sshi eventually went into septic shock. We're trying to keep things within our control, but at this rate there's not much we can do but to let the medication run it's course. We've administered stronger antibiotics for him and because of his weakened lungs we've put him on the ventilator to support his breathing" The doctor tried his best to keep his tone professional.
"Is he going to be okay?" Leeteuk interjected.
The doctor hesitated for a moment. "The mortality rate for septic shock is high. Yesung-sshi is young, but his body has been through a lot since the accident. I'm concerned that his heart might be showing early signs of failure. We are already giving him medication for that.
If he doesn't respond to the medication, he might be facing multiple organ failure and eventually fall into a full comatose state. And when that happens, there's nothing much we can do, he will be depending on life support until-"
A surge of anger washed over him like a hot wave of fury. No.! he's not dying! He's not! Kangin yelled. He can't die! You gotta do something! anything!"
"Leeteuk sshi, Kangin sshi... " The doctor continued, his tone was calm and practiced. "We've done all we can for him, and we will definitely continue to assist him aggressively in this fight. But please understand that his body is just too weak-"
For the second time Kangin cuts off the doctor before he could finish. "No! I don't want to hear it! You do what you need to do! Don't give me this bullshit!" Kangin looked like he was about to charge at the innocent doctor, but Leeteuk held him in place, telling him to calm down. "Youngwoon-ah, it's not gonna make things any better if you take it out on the doctor, he's only doing his job."
"I'm sorry.I wish there was a better news for the both you." The doctor truly was sorry. "You can see him if you wish, he's settled in the ICU. Keep talking to him, encourage him, it would be a good help for him." he encouraged. "I'll make sure to grant you all-time access to be with Yesung-sshi in his ICU room." The doctor then gave them a small bow before turning away.
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Both men quietly entered the room. The sight before them robbed their breath away.
Kangin's steps stopped dead as he allowed himself to take in Yesung's full appearance. His eyes were closed and his skin was almost as white as the sheets. Series of wires and more tubes attached to his body, running beneath the hospital gown. The heart monitor beeps quietly beside the bed, a blood pressure cuff wrapped around his left arm and a pulse oximeter attached to his finger. Yesung seems to be attached to every medical equipment available. But none of them were as disturbing as the plastic tube threaded down Yesung's throat, delivering air into his lungs mechanically.
He looked perfectly peaceful, almost as if he was sleeping soundly.
Acidic bile begin to bubble at the back of his throat. Kangin couldn’t help but think that it should have been him lying in that bed instead of Yesung.
Unable to contain his emotion, he tore away his gaze from Yesung's too still form and made a hasty exit out of the room, his feet led him towards the fire escape located at the end of the hallway.
"Damn it!" he screamed, banging his fist on the wall, taking out his anger on the painted cement. Tears pouring uncontrollably down his face. "God damn it!" He hit the wall once more, leaned his back against it, and sunk down to the linoleum floor. The doctor's words kept ringing in his head. Yesung is dying, and it's all because of him. Yesung would have never been placed in this position if it wasn't for him. "Jongwoon-ah... I don't know how I'm going to face another day if anything happens to you." He brought his hands to his face, sobbing uncontrollably.
The heavy doors of the fire escape creaked open. "Kangin-ah.." Leeteuk walked towards Kangin. Kneeling down beside the younger man, he placed his hand on Kangin's shoulder, the man didn't shy away from his touch.
Kangin trembled as the sobs became more pronounced. "Teuk hyung... I did this to him! I can't do this anymore hyung.. I can't...It hurts a lot..it hurts too much to even look at him."
Leeteuk's heart broke along with Kangin's.
"You have no idea how many times I feel the need to take it out on everyone Youngwoon-ah! Run away, stop coming to the hospital just so I don't have to see him suffer like this. You have no idea Youngwoon-ah...My heart pained for both of you, and Jongwoon.. he kept getting worse under my watch... how am I supposed to feel ? How..? But I thought about him, about what he's done, I realize I have to be strong for him too. He needs us to be strong too.
"I'm not as strong as you think hyung! I'm not!" Kangin didn't care anymore that he's crying like a baby.
Leeteuk stared at Kangin's pained eyes, "Who said that you were strong? Just because you're "Kangin" you're supposed to be okay when your friend's fighting for his life? I'm not strong too, but I have to be Kangin, we have to be strong...for his sake..."
"Youngwoon-ah, he never gave up on you , you can't give up on him...especially not now. He's going to get through this, he just needs us to have faith in him." .Leeteuk couldn’t let Kangin hear any doubt in his voice.
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The ICU was unearthly quiet aside from the steady click and whoosh of air coming from Yesung’s ventilator and the incessant beeping of the heart monitor. Sitting next to Yesung's bed watching the mechanical rise and fall of his chest was especially painful for him.
Exhaustion was beginning to take a toll on him. His emotions were all over the place and it was making him dizzy. Kangin sniffed loudly, mouth trembling and tears spilling down his face.
"Jongwoon-ah... you have got to bounce out of this, fight! I know you must be really tired by now...but, quitting is not an option. Our Yesung never quits on anything, and you can't start now." He paused in attempt to steady his voice. "Take your time ..but just...just come back to us okay? Everyone misses you.." He choked back a sob.
"I know... I've said things to hurt you, my actions towards you...they might be too much. I-I just want you to know I never meant to hurt you, it's just... that you're too cute when you get teased." He stifled an awkward laugh, an effort to make himself feel slightly better. "But I'm sorry Jongwoon-ah, I'm sorry for not being there for you...I'm sorry for taking you for granted! I'm sorry for what I've said before we had gotten into this hell of a mess. I didn't mean them." More tears spilled down,his face red from crying. "I wish I could turn back time and change things...but I can't." It was getting harder to talk, his head feels heavy and his heart aches too much. He once again felt grief tugging at him, piercing through his being. "I-i have nothing to give you Jongwoon-ah.. I don't know how to fix this..."
He sat silently for a few minutes just staring at Yesung's slack face. He wanted to say more, but it was almost time for him to leave. His manager would pop by any minute to take him home, there's no way in hell he'd let his manager see him like this.
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Yesung's condition had been bouncing around, almost as if teasing them, keeping them on the edges of their seats. His health would improve greatly, but only to plummet down back into danger zone later on. Yesung's body still fought the infection that seemed to be gripping him like a vice, showing no signs of letting up. Leeteuk and Kangin were told by one of the doctors that Yesung's heart might not be able to handle the strain anymore. And that they might need to prepare themselves, seeing that the young man might lose his battle anytime. Both Leeteuk and Kangin had been worried and angry at the doctors words. But they wouldn't buy it. They refuse to believe it.
Leeteuk found himself nodding off in the chair. Opening his eyes, he looked around blearily around the room and frowned at the sight of Kangin's uncomfortable form snoring lightly in the plastic chair across him. He moved his attention on Yesung, watching for any signs of distress or wakefulness.
"Sungie-ah.. you're trying to give this old man a heart attack? You never really had gotten yourself into any trouble all these years. But this time you made your point.. you can be quite a toublemaker." He laughed to himself softly. You have got-"
His soft ramblings were intterupted by the presence of the tall mysterious looking doctor. Leeteuk had to admit, he was more comfortable with this particular doctor.
They greeted each other lightly as the doctor carried on with the routine check up on his patient. "He's doing much better today, his oxygen levels are better too. I'm going to see about weaning him off the ventilator and replacing it with a normal oxygen mask. He's been showing steady signs of improvement these past few days." The doctor nodded, satisfied with his patient's improvement.
"Really?" Leeteuk asked wide eyed. His eyes shining with tears.
The doctor nodded once more. "He's a fighter Leeteuk-sshi. His body had gone through so much, it was unimaginable. And yet he's still here. He's fighting hard, and I'm sure he'll bounce back from this soon." He kept his voice low, minding the other sleeping man in the room.
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He was sure that he was hearing voices. But they were so muffled and unclear to him. He tried to open his eyes slowly, but screwed them shut again as the intruding bright light pierced his vision.
"H-h-hyung? Y-y-youngwoon? he called out breathlessly, his own voice muffled. His eyes searched around under the half-mast, hoping to see the familiar faces.
"Jongwoon!" "Sungie!" Kangin and Leeteuk pretty much jumped towards the bed the second they heard Yesung's weak voice.
A big smile plastered across Kangin's face, his hand moved to brush back Yesung's hair. "You're awake!" He exclaimed, tone filled with mixed emotions.
"I'll get the doctor!" Leeteuk called out in excitement.
"Y-youngwoon..." Yesung reached for the oxygen mask , trying to rid the obstruction over his mouth and nose. But Kangin was quick to stop Yesung's sluggish hand. "You need it.. leave it.."
The other man's face contorted in confusion, not actually sure what's happening around him.
“You're awake I see." another voice interrupted, seemingly out of nowhere. "Yesung-sshi, I’m going to check your pressure okay?” Yesung nodded slightly despite his confusion. When the doctor was done, he continued to assess his patient, making sure everything else is alright.
The doctor turned towards the other two men standing behind him. Both eager to know if their friend is finally turning for the better. "I'm happy to inform you that his blood pressure is finally up along with his other vital signs. Both of his lungs sounded good too. It seems that Yesung-sshi is finally coming out of this." His face displayed a satisfying smile. "I'll be ordering more blood work test and run other precaution examinations to make sure that everything is where it should be. We'll be bringing him up for the tests as soon as he is more alert.
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Another week and a few health scares later, the doctors finally agreed that Yesung was finally on the mend and out of any danger. The pneumonia that ravaged his lungs cleared up and the infection defeated with the continuous strong antibiotics administered. Both Leeteuk and Kangin were finally able to breathe easier upon the good news.
With his health steadily improving, Yesung's face gained back some of the color that he had been lacking for weeks, his mood became better and he slowly beginning to go back to his own self.
The boys would come and visit him every now and then, accompanying him, making sure that he wouldn't succumb to the plague of boredom. Everything was slowly coming back to the way it was.
"Jongwoon-ah..." Kangin shifted in his seat uncomfortably and Yesung gave him a pointed glance.
"What is it?" His eyebrows creased at his friend's tone.
"I... I just... uh... thanks for saving my life Jongwoon-ah!" He blurted out and heaved a sigh. "Even after all I've done and said... I don't know what I'd-" His words cut off mid-sentence. Yesung knew what Kangin was going to say and he knew how hard it could be for Kangin to be pouring his heart out on the still sore subject.
"It's okay Youngwoon-ah, you don't need to say it. I understand." An honest smile forming on his face. "What matters now is that everything is going to be fine."
"No. What matters now is that you're fine and I can finally sleep soundly now! Hell everyone can finally sleep soundly now!" Kangin grinned.
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Today was going to be the day Yesung would be finally be released from the hospital. Everyone was excited and happy to have Yesung released from the hospital ; especially for Kangin and Leeteuk who came to the hospital early in the morning to bring Yesung back to their dorm.
Having gathered up Yesung's belongings, Kangin helped Yesung with getting dressed into fresh clothes. It was a difficult task to accomplish, but after some soft bantering between the two, they managed. Walking down the hall was another big task that Yesung had to face as he refused the wheelchair. Both Kangin and Leeteuk shared an incredulous glance at Yesung's determination, but they decided to let the man have it his way. They settled by walking by his side, just in case.
The walk from Yesung's room down to the hospital entrance took longer than expected as they made a few stops whenever Yesung's legs were about to give out. But the man never gave up, he'd get back to his feet stubbornly and trudged on.
"Take it easy Jongwoon-ah! You're going to wear yourself out and you'll end up checking in back to your room!" Kangin said jokingly although he realized that if that really happened, it wouldn't be a laughing matter.
Yesung looked up to Kangin and flashed him a smile, his breath panting a little. "It's okay Youngwoon-ah. I'm fine. This is exhausting, but I'm good." Kangin ignored the man's reply and rolled his eyes. He then realized the chilly morning temperature. Pulling the scarf off himself, he quickly placed the scarf around Yesung's neck, adjusting it in place, making sure it would do it's job keeping the older man warm. "You gotta stay warm, you can't risk getting a cold."
A black van then pulled up a few yards away from them. Their ride is here. Another short flight of stairs, and there's the van waiting to bring them home.
Before Yesung could say anything, Kangin scooped Yesung into his strong arms and carried the smaller man down the short set of staircase, and then towards the van. Kangin's action startled him. He latched onto Kangin automatically , but gladly accepted the help his friend offered.
"Youngwoon-ah, I'm not invalid!" Yesung whined.
"Oh quiet you, Jongwoon... I'm saving your butt from face planting on the concrete." he retorted in playful exasperation as he loaded Yesung carefully into the van.
Leeteuk couldn't help but smile at the two.
With all of them settled safely inside the van, the vehicle rolled into motion. Destination : home.
Kangin glanced over and saw that Yesung had his head resting against the window with his eyes closed. Kangin could tell by the even steady breaths that Yesung had fallen asleep. The walk down to the hospital entrance must have exhaust his recovering body out. Kangin smiled to himself. That's what you get for being a stubborn brat. Leaning his head against Yesung's shoulder, Kangin too fell asleep.
They still had a long way to go before Yesung would be back in perfect condition. There are so much issues that they need to fix amongst themselves. But the fact that he was back was enough for Leeteuk to finally sigh in total relief. Yesung was getting better and no longer in any danger. He couldn't ask for more. Glancing at his two donsaengs sleeping comfortably, he closed his eyes.
Thank you god.
Things are finally looking up.
Despite all the hardships they had gone through for the past weeks, they all pulled through alright. Together.
THE END.
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♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥SJ♥
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Finally! And... I thought the chapter before this was hard to write ~_~. This chapter pretty much burnt my fried brain to crisp. This chapter took me awhile, I kept starting over, and ugh! I couldn't piece them together the way I want it to. The ending was a bit rushed as I had to take out a lot from what I had originally wrote. It was a mess; and still is.
I struggled a lot towards the end because it was so hard for me to conclude the story. (As I tend to go on and on and on) Plus, it was so hard to fix Yesung. I guess I only know how to break him =( I hope you guys will enjoy this anyways. I would also like to thank everyone who followed this fic. Especially to those who had been reading from the very first chapter. THANK YOU. Thanks to EVERYONE who stopped by to read any of these chapters, silent readers or not.
Once I get back from Daegu, I'll be starting on a new fic. With any luck, I hope to see you kind people on the next ride.
Stay safe and healthy always<3