old habbits are hard to break

[bradinthehouse]

so haven’t done this in awhile... kinda weird. life’s totally different then it was a month ago... nothings even close to being the same as it was.... i haven’t talked to him in over 2 weeks, its not like i have a choice weather i want to or not, my parents made that decision up for me. i hate those days that come where there’s nothing i would rather do then just be in his arms or looking into his eyes but i know that’s something that’s just not even an option for me. i honestly don’t know how i stop myself from calling him... i guess i just think about how good he’s doing and how happy he is right now not having to stress or worry about shit cause of me and i realize that this is best for the both of us. if i could have anything this christmas it would be for him to know how much i care and love him still to this day and how no matter what i always will.

but looking on the bright side i have awesome great friends who i love with everything and show me just how lucky i really am. lately every moment i send with them is always full of fun and excitement weather its having slumber parties almost every night of the week, the 3 of us spending almost our whole night in the bathroom, the beach in the middle of the night (it was freezing), looking at christmas lights, shopping like every day, playing kings and flip cup, movie night, or brandon curling my hair....theres never a dull moment! you guys are the best i don’t know how to even start explaining how much i love every single one of you!

prob last entry for a long while.......