24 hours
Maybe my feeling for this past weekend came earlier then it should have. Maybe it was premptive for this week. Dad calls yesterday, his car is broken down. He puts it on a dolly and brings it down to me at work an brings mom along with him. I was mentioned some of her FB posts that made me think, not much more then normal when it considers her. But, enough that I paid attention to her and her reactions to different things that I did an said. An before they left, I gave dad a hug and he told me he loved me an I did the same. My mom... She stood off to the side an never offered such things. I told them good night an we went our seperate ways. I made it home, got ready to make food, realized I left my phone tether at work. Went back to work at a request to get it, an I did so gladdly. I came back home an had a nice long conversation with Kaeli, someone who always brightens my day. We got off the phone an my mind wouldnt rest. I finally fell asleep sometime around 130 this morning. I woke up an turned off the alarm, woke up again, went back to sleep, woke again an went back to sleep, fighting off a bad dream each time. I came too one last time an got up an got ready for work. Before I could even make it out of the house I had gotten a text sayin that grandpa had been hit by a tractor trailer an he was on his way to RMH. No extent to what had happend. I sat in my car for a few minutes, maybe longer. All I know is I looked at the clock in my car an saw that it was somewhere around 7:40 an I needed to get on the ball. I decided I would go to work, so, I called my boss an told him I was running late, go there late, had no worries worked on a few cars before I got a phone call. Up untill this point I had done a good job hiding my concern. An I was told he was being transported to UVA, not by helecopter, no the weather was too bad. But by ambulance. Its raining, it was heavey fog here, I can only imagine what the weather was like on top of Afton Mountain. His blood pressure was really low, they knew he broke his leg, but thats all they would release to anyone. I broke then, I couldnt hold that knowledge under the pressure that I could of him being in an accident. I teared an cried an prayed... A couple of hours passed till I heard anything again. They had gotten him stable at UVA and were checking him over, thats all I was told. 15 minutes later I was called again an was told that he had a fractured Feamer and would need to go into surgery to have it fixed. 20 minutes later I was called again, his replacement hip is shatered, Feamer is broken in two places, ankle is broken and wrist is broken and they are again working on getting him stablized so they can do surgery tomarrow. An as of right now, thats all I know. Why am I not there? I have a history with that hospital. I cant be near it or in it without getting the feeling like I am walking over my own grave. Somewhere I still feel as if the last time I went under the knife at that place I didnt get up off the table.
Right now, if it werent for Kaeli I dont know where I would be. If it werent for her, right now I would feel so alone right now, it wouldnt even be funny. I left work early with my boss asking me if I was going there. He knows I dont like hospitals an rather not deal with them. I told him I was thinking about it, an I still am. I just wasnt worth anything at work with all this floating through my head. Still havent made dinner. I'm not hungry. I made myself eat lunch because a couple of guys wanted me to go with them. When I left work, I know the speedo hit tripple digits more the once. Its not something I've done in ages, I have nothing to prove behind the wheel of the car. Nothing to no one, nothing to myself. I know what I can an cant do with the car as it is. It just... Felt like it was something I needed to do, a form of release, an somewhere inside I wished I would have done it more then that. I came home an hooked into my desktop an have been talking to Kae ever since. Shes calmed me, kept my head on my shoulders. I know by the look on my face and in my eyes, she may not think she is, but shes doing a damn good job. I pulled out my pictures from greece that he an I are in an just looked them over. Its been a long time since we've been on any kind of trip together, let alone got to gether an talked. An in those pictures I found my pictures from Yellowstone and my highschool graduation. He's in each of those scenes somewhere. He an grandmother are the reason I am where I am now... Long gone from harrisonburg with a good job.... I swear, if anything happens to him... I cant hurt the truck driver, but I can protest the route he was trying to drive his rig on. A road he shouldnt be on to begin with.
Right now, if it werent for Kaeli I dont know where I would be. If it werent for her, right now I would feel so alone right now, it wouldnt even be funny. I left work early with my boss asking me if I was going there. He knows I dont like hospitals an rather not deal with them. I told him I was thinking about it, an I still am. I just wasnt worth anything at work with all this floating through my head. Still havent made dinner. I'm not hungry. I made myself eat lunch because a couple of guys wanted me to go with them. When I left work, I know the speedo hit tripple digits more the once. Its not something I've done in ages, I have nothing to prove behind the wheel of the car. Nothing to no one, nothing to myself. I know what I can an cant do with the car as it is. It just... Felt like it was something I needed to do, a form of release, an somewhere inside I wished I would have done it more then that. I came home an hooked into my desktop an have been talking to Kae ever since. Shes calmed me, kept my head on my shoulders. I know by the look on my face and in my eyes, she may not think she is, but shes doing a damn good job. I pulled out my pictures from greece that he an I are in an just looked them over. Its been a long time since we've been on any kind of trip together, let alone got to gether an talked. An in those pictures I found my pictures from Yellowstone and my highschool graduation. He's in each of those scenes somewhere. He an grandmother are the reason I am where I am now... Long gone from harrisonburg with a good job.... I swear, if anything happens to him... I cant hurt the truck driver, but I can protest the route he was trying to drive his rig on. A road he shouldnt be on to begin with.