Still Waters
A conversation I had with chestervhe not long ago on getting older and changing one's life gave me much to ponder upon, and now that my birthday has come and gone, I find myself mulling over the concept yet again.
The vast bulk of my friends are settled people, married, many with children, owning houses and living in the 'burbs. Periodically I find myself wondering if I've missed out. Did I choose poorly by not going for the quiet life? Should I have settled down and done what most people do?
I constantly have a nagging sensation that I should be doing something different. Something more than what I am doing. But I just don't know what that is. I suspect I won't actually know it until I find it, but how can I find it if I don't know where to look?
Stability is not the same thing as stagnation. Once you've satisfied the base needs of Maslow's hierarchy, it's incumbent upon you to strive for the higher levels of fulfillment. We must always challenge ourselves and become more than we are.
Each of us does this in a different way, however. For some, it's marriage and family. For others, it's career achievement. For others, it's through beloved hobbies or personal explorations. You can't live your life according to someone else's expectations or what society deems as the suitable way to be.
In reading Maslow's work, I find that I am very much the self-actualized man I want to be, in almost every respect. I'm very proud of that, and realizing that as I'm nearly halfway to the end of my life (gulp), at 33 I can look in the mirror and largely say that "This is the person I am meant to be." There are still some things I would change, but I am generally satisfied.
But there is still so much more for me to do. So much I haven't done, seen, or experienced yet. And we have so little time--we think we have decades, but they flash by in an instant. We need to find a way to make every day count, even if it's in the smallest way possible.
I may not have the life that most people do, but I have what is right for me, and it's incumbent that I keep living that life to the fullest of my ability. Each one of us must live the life that's right for us, and live it so completely that they regret nothing and love everything about it.
That's all that counts in the end.
The vast bulk of my friends are settled people, married, many with children, owning houses and living in the 'burbs. Periodically I find myself wondering if I've missed out. Did I choose poorly by not going for the quiet life? Should I have settled down and done what most people do?
I constantly have a nagging sensation that I should be doing something different. Something more than what I am doing. But I just don't know what that is. I suspect I won't actually know it until I find it, but how can I find it if I don't know where to look?
Stability is not the same thing as stagnation. Once you've satisfied the base needs of Maslow's hierarchy, it's incumbent upon you to strive for the higher levels of fulfillment. We must always challenge ourselves and become more than we are.
Each of us does this in a different way, however. For some, it's marriage and family. For others, it's career achievement. For others, it's through beloved hobbies or personal explorations. You can't live your life according to someone else's expectations or what society deems as the suitable way to be.
In reading Maslow's work, I find that I am very much the self-actualized man I want to be, in almost every respect. I'm very proud of that, and realizing that as I'm nearly halfway to the end of my life (gulp), at 33 I can look in the mirror and largely say that "This is the person I am meant to be." There are still some things I would change, but I am generally satisfied.
But there is still so much more for me to do. So much I haven't done, seen, or experienced yet. And we have so little time--we think we have decades, but they flash by in an instant. We need to find a way to make every day count, even if it's in the smallest way possible.
I may not have the life that most people do, but I have what is right for me, and it's incumbent that I keep living that life to the fullest of my ability. Each one of us must live the life that's right for us, and live it so completely that they regret nothing and love everything about it.
That's all that counts in the end.