I feel crap. I think bursting into tears because Allie lost her kitten alerted me to that. It's been 31 hours since the last tiny bit of sprinkles, and these feelings are not new
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haha, i'm a mess. i even had a shower earlier as a 'distraction' and i don't even believe in shower distractions lol. now i'm drowning in my own sweat and waiting for sleepies to kick in and wondering if i should have a glass of wine to help them lol. except i don't know if i can stomach wine.
don't know what he's doing now. i'm guessing he's not in love with uni that he started this month and has gone back to heavy smoking. dad is always really naive and blind about these things, so i assume he wants to talk about how stefan is anti social instead lol
from brother's perspective, my mum is insane and with dad he is forced to live in a small 2 bedroom unit with dad and the cow
it'll get better. last time, it got better in about a week and a half. a week after that i decided that i was bored and got some more. adn then didn't stop getting some more lol the only thing i hate about it is that i become obsessed and stop going out to have it. otherwise it would be just like cycolones - perfection on a stick lol
dear me.
but anyway.
i have goals but need lists. i don't have enough lists but i have no energy to write one. that's how i know it's serious. even when i was failing uni i was still writing lists lol
lose 20kg then i can have some again (in order to put the 20kg back on and start the cycle all over again). i think i'm meant to be getting like, pregnant or something in a few years time - so maybe i could quit then instead? lol
LOL your getting pregnant? uh huh. I can see that going really well :P
I need to lose 20 kg too, but I don't smoke therefor can't stop smoking to lose weight,. Maybe I should stop eating? I wish i was 17 again, it was so easy to not eat back then. Why not now :/
LOL i've been thiking about that for a about a year and a half now. why was it so easy then and not so easy now. i went trhough a cuople of really sprinkle bad food binging things a couple of weeks ago, and i felt so gross the next two days that i kept coughing and gagging and dry retching and found that i could still bring up food on command and a lot of it lol. and then afterwards there was that light headed feeling and later the euphoeria - I SOO wanted to rush out to coles for a new special tootbrush and organise my toilet lol
yea the whole pregnancy thing i'm not coping with at all. and apparently my coping mechanisms (cutting, throwing up, drinking and sprinkling are not recommended when pregnant lol) but apparently kim has cancer and is in menopause and that also has effects on pregnancy (apparently it doesn't happen lol)
which means i have ot somehow manage to stay sober for 9 months without killing myself. after that i can hand the thing to kim to take care of lol she's very patient and loves babies lol
haha some anonymous sperm we buy off the ineternt of course lol.wonder if i could explain to the kid (once it has the capacity to udnerstand things of course lol) that the stork stole the kid from some couple and dropped it to us instead coz we always fed (ie bribed ) the stork as she flew on her daily business when she was flying around
i want kids. you know - in a long time away and wit me not having to do anything about anytinhg of the sort lol
i just want my children t obe lookded after slaves.
like my dudes how i ADORE, but who gets fed by kim, who also cleans his naughties on the balony aand washes the balcony and buys them new bedblenkies when flyn decided projectile vomitof whatever grossetivity she swallowed recently lol
LOL you need another dog. I don't know if a kid would like to know it was stolen from its parents and given to you lol
i said to a friend the other day (a gay guy who wants a kid) that i will rent out my uterus if he takes 90% custody of the kid and I get a say in the name. But when I said I don't do nappies or baby puke he wasn't so keen lol
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don't know what he's doing now. i'm guessing he's not in love with uni that he started this month and has gone back to heavy smoking. dad is always really naive and blind about these things, so i assume he wants to talk about how stefan is anti social instead lol
from brother's perspective, my mum is insane and with dad he is forced to live in a small 2 bedroom unit with dad and the cow
i think now i'm just rambling lol
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dear me.
but anyway.
i have goals but need lists. i don't have enough lists but i have no energy to write one. that's how i know it's serious. even when i was failing uni i was still writing lists lol
lose 20kg then i can have some again (in order to put the 20kg back on and start the cycle all over again). i think i'm meant to be getting like, pregnant or something in a few years time - so maybe i could quit then instead? lol
Reply
I need to lose 20 kg too, but I don't smoke therefor can't stop smoking to lose weight,. Maybe I should stop eating? I wish i was 17 again, it was so easy to not eat back then. Why not now :/
Reply
i went trhough a cuople of really sprinkle bad food binging things a couple of weeks ago, and i felt so gross the next two days that i kept coughing and gagging and dry retching and found that i could still bring up food on command and a lot of it lol. and then afterwards there was that light headed feeling and later the euphoeria - I SOO wanted to rush out to coles for a new special tootbrush and organise my toilet lol
yea the whole pregnancy thing i'm not coping with at all. and apparently my coping mechanisms (cutting, throwing up, drinking and sprinkling are not recommended when pregnant lol) but apparently kim has cancer and is in menopause and that also has effects on pregnancy (apparently it doesn't happen lol)
which means i have ot somehow manage to stay sober for 9 months without killing myself. after that i can hand the thing to kim to take care of lol she's very patient and loves babies lol
Reply
I can't see you coping with pregnancy, except maybe the morning sickness part lol but who would be the dad?
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i want kids. you know - in a long time away and wit me not having to do anything about anytinhg of the sort lol
i just want my children t obe lookded after slaves.
like my dudes how i ADORE, but who gets fed by kim, who also cleans his naughties on the balony aand washes the balcony and buys them new bedblenkies when flyn decided projectile vomitof whatever grossetivity she swallowed recently lol
Reply
hey i can combine travelling with sperm shopping!!! wonder what are the human sperm rates in alaska? can't do sperm whale, i already fat in the family
http://au.pfinance.yahoo.com/special-features/sperm-sale/index.html
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i said to a friend the other day (a gay guy who wants a kid) that i will rent out my uterus if he takes 90% custody of the kid and I get a say in the name. But when I said I don't do nappies or baby puke he wasn't so keen lol
Reply
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