Apr 21, 2008 12:56
my grandma Lydia is visiting from Virginia this week and I have been doing down the peninsula to be with her and hang out with family.
often times when i am around close family, my cousins especially, I realize how little I share with them at times. its hard to share my life with people that just think you are weird or bizarre. I guess lately i have been more interested in people that are kin- brothers and sisters from different mothers and fathers. even then, it is sometimes hard.
and even more recent I feel I have little to contribute or feel misunderstood by these kin as well.
Saturn and Pluto are in retrograde- so I am focusing on my intentions on this planet, my impact, the help I can provide and be a part of something bigger.
Last year I felt so much that my friends understood me, but now my friends feel far from me- some moving far away. Living in San Francisco sometimes feels like you belong to this 7mi x 7mi tip of a peninsula. It is hard to get away from and and sometimes belonging to it is like isolating yourself. Would I rather not be in it? I've been moving in and out of san francisco for the past 5 years. It is time to stay in one place, but who the fuck can do that in this city? There is always something better... unless you live in the Mission.