(no subject)
i'm fucking everything up. im so retarded. okay so heres the scerano. too long to explain so heres half of it. i am in love with elia. but yesterday talking to some ppl made me kind of second guess myself if i really did or not. i do so BACK OFF PEOPLE. i cant stop thinking about him and i hate fighting. okay i love him. im just scared to fall in love becasue i dont want to get hurt and such. and now everything is fucked up just cuz i so confused all the time. im scared to fall in love, yes i am. but its too late cuz i have fallen in love. and nothing is going to stop this from happening. i have never felt this way about someone before and i spent this whole intrepid day thinking about elia. i spend EVERY DAY thinking about him. i cry when im not with him and im so fucking happy when i am with him. this is tearing me apart. and us. i have never been in love so i dont know wat it feels like but this must be it. this is the feeling of love. im not going to hide from it anymore im just going to admit that i do. and i know some people might not believe this but i do i really do. it just took me this long to realize that i do this whole time i was hiding from it and from admitting that i hvae really fallen in love with elia. this isnt bullshit. i speak from the heart. no more thinking with my brain. straight from the heart i love you elia. this isnt bullshit so please believe this. i wouldnt lie about it. if this isnt love then wat is it??