Relationship Building
It's a dark misty night. And so as I enter a party, full of noise, laughter, and singing, I'm thinking to myself...
Dang there's a lot of people and i know a lot of them. How did I first get to meet them? How come their in my life right now, apart of it?
I have feelings of sadness, sharing their pains, hearing their struggles, a healthy crying to overcome our losses while empathizing;
I have feelings of happiness, sharing their joys, comforted by their warmth; hiding from their hugs;
Laughter Check.
Overcoming awkward moments together Check.
Resolving arguments and frustrations Check.
Working together to make our communities better. Check
Actually all of the above is still in progress but certain objectives have been accomplished and moments shared with folks.
I may be thinking this in a matter of seconds but all these actual experiences have encompassed years being together with a variety of people: the hours of discussing topics, or tackling issues together in a homework assignment, going to a music event, doing something really stupid and living to tell about it, or just plain chilling. There's just a sort of comfort being in the same space as the ones you care for and love.
For instance, basketball can involve numerous ideas: there might be basketball talk at one moment, rooting for GS Warriors on tv, to how you can make a better jumpshot shooting hoops yourself, or just enjoying the exercise running up and down the courts. To learning about capitalism and how it affects everything and can be related in probably every conversation.
Leading to-"And I" show on ESPN tv, a professional traveling street basketball team who travels in the U.S. and around the world, playing street basketball. They got it right when they toured the P.I. You can play basketball but you can't ignore the conditions that the people face everyday. Some kids play without any footwear, no hoops, but they love playing the game. Then there's the NBA players who have millions of dollars, endorsments, and luxury cars. Then there are the owners of those NBA teams who have even more millions, own the rights to those ads, and have even more luxury cars. What about those folks who work the stands of those Warrior games? Or the folks scalping tickets outside? Basketball can be a game but capitalism loves to make money of anything.
Anyways, just a like the party, people are coming and going, they enter your life and then you they leave you. Topics change depending on who you talk to. You do certain activities with certain people. Although I can always talk with people, it's not about the same topic. I can't always wall climb, play video games, dance with the "Lock Foundation (aka LKC Lockers- u know who u are lol)", listen to punk or heavy metal while eating a vegan sandwich, ride a moped with, live in the same house with, or organize with the same person. I think we're all unique and we have different friends with different hobbies, likes, personalities which can help us grow as individuals through our interactions with one another.
Just thinking about the types of relationships we have and how it relates:
--Family: I can't believe what we've gone through together. yikes. I appreciate all the support they have given me and how they continue to do so. My good education is all thanks to them. However, I don't appreciate all the lies,shame/guilt/pressure, hypocrisies I either witnessed or experienced. Whether it's gambling with my money or my emotions, it gets crazy at times. But all in all I still love ya. On a side note, I know i'm 28 but i still can't believe I have a nephew and a niece. I'm enjoying watching them growing up.
--Friends: They can also be family. Definitely you sure spend quite a part of your life doing stuff with them. Some relationships span for only a couple of months like my coworkers at school to almost ten years like my friend that i'll visit in L.A. or my pen pal from Japan. So many people I've met, so many people to thank. You can't be with your friends all the time: they may move, go to a different school, or part ways and stay outta touch. Other times you wish they wouldn't do the actions they plan to do, did, or they've actually regretted themselves. Well then, this obviously tests how strong our friendships are and what lengths I'm willing to be with them. And unfortunately, I have parted from friendships whose arguments and disagreements couldn't be resolved. I guess i'll thank what i've learned them from those friendships. Note: I can't work with people who continously lie to me or just won't communicate with me at all.
But i'm even more humble and happy to have the friends who have stucked through with my craziness self, lol.
--Love interests: Now i know everyone who's ever known me and is interested about this topic will scoll here to this point, lol. Like that one soap opera hunk said on tv, "You gotta make yourself vulnerable sometime. Otherwise you'll never know." Or the late great Aaliyah says, " And if first you don't succeed... you can dust yourself off and try again."
Nothing is ever perfect in this department. Remember that. You will make mistakes ahahaha. Deal with it. There are healthy ways are there are unhealthy ways mind u.
I know rejection is a bad feeling going through it but I'd rather be with someone who would be mutually happy with me. Who knows when I'll ever date again. Since I'm not interested in anyboby right now (awww too bad ahahaha, j/k j/k), I'm happy where i'm at right now and supporting friends who want to put themselves out there and be vulnerable.
--Self: My own worst enemy. The doubts that my mind tricks plays. That I've never good enough or that the end is near. Why is it so clouded? Why can't this pain of misery go away? I use to think of that until you actually do this thing that people can teach you but only you can apply for yourself. That is to love yourself, to take care of yourself and knowyou are good enough. That this thing called life is something very special. It's a long and continous process though. Whether you're religious or not, I still think people should make the most of their own life. When people pass away, you definitely can't have the same relationship as before. But I always like to think that there is a special place in my heart for everyone that's touched my life. Nobody can take that away from me. And like I said in my previous entry, I love the work i'm doing now and hopefully i'll continue to grow from it.
Summary of capitalism check: I mentioned a few topics and true to its word here's how capitalism affects each one.
family- i mentioned gambling already. friends- the idea of eating out all the time isn't always cuz we really want to. dang those tv, radio, and poster ads. love interests- ah valentines day, money, power, expensive clothing/make-up, etc. self- relying on only yourself to survive. Dang, like in reference to homer saying this to ned flanders in the simpsons: dang, stupid, sexy serg you were right about capitalism ahahaha!
Conclusion:
Well the entry has to end somewhere just like that party. Now it's time to go and work on my relationships!
Dang there's a lot of people and i know a lot of them. How did I first get to meet them? How come their in my life right now, apart of it?
I have feelings of sadness, sharing their pains, hearing their struggles, a healthy crying to overcome our losses while empathizing;
I have feelings of happiness, sharing their joys, comforted by their warmth; hiding from their hugs;
Laughter Check.
Overcoming awkward moments together Check.
Resolving arguments and frustrations Check.
Working together to make our communities better. Check
Actually all of the above is still in progress but certain objectives have been accomplished and moments shared with folks.
I may be thinking this in a matter of seconds but all these actual experiences have encompassed years being together with a variety of people: the hours of discussing topics, or tackling issues together in a homework assignment, going to a music event, doing something really stupid and living to tell about it, or just plain chilling. There's just a sort of comfort being in the same space as the ones you care for and love.
For instance, basketball can involve numerous ideas: there might be basketball talk at one moment, rooting for GS Warriors on tv, to how you can make a better jumpshot shooting hoops yourself, or just enjoying the exercise running up and down the courts. To learning about capitalism and how it affects everything and can be related in probably every conversation.
Leading to-"And I" show on ESPN tv, a professional traveling street basketball team who travels in the U.S. and around the world, playing street basketball. They got it right when they toured the P.I. You can play basketball but you can't ignore the conditions that the people face everyday. Some kids play without any footwear, no hoops, but they love playing the game. Then there's the NBA players who have millions of dollars, endorsments, and luxury cars. Then there are the owners of those NBA teams who have even more millions, own the rights to those ads, and have even more luxury cars. What about those folks who work the stands of those Warrior games? Or the folks scalping tickets outside? Basketball can be a game but capitalism loves to make money of anything.
Anyways, just a like the party, people are coming and going, they enter your life and then you they leave you. Topics change depending on who you talk to. You do certain activities with certain people. Although I can always talk with people, it's not about the same topic. I can't always wall climb, play video games, dance with the "Lock Foundation (aka LKC Lockers- u know who u are lol)", listen to punk or heavy metal while eating a vegan sandwich, ride a moped with, live in the same house with, or organize with the same person. I think we're all unique and we have different friends with different hobbies, likes, personalities which can help us grow as individuals through our interactions with one another.
Just thinking about the types of relationships we have and how it relates:
--Family: I can't believe what we've gone through together. yikes. I appreciate all the support they have given me and how they continue to do so. My good education is all thanks to them. However, I don't appreciate all the lies,shame/guilt/pressure, hypocrisies I either witnessed or experienced. Whether it's gambling with my money or my emotions, it gets crazy at times. But all in all I still love ya. On a side note, I know i'm 28 but i still can't believe I have a nephew and a niece. I'm enjoying watching them growing up.
--Friends: They can also be family. Definitely you sure spend quite a part of your life doing stuff with them. Some relationships span for only a couple of months like my coworkers at school to almost ten years like my friend that i'll visit in L.A. or my pen pal from Japan. So many people I've met, so many people to thank. You can't be with your friends all the time: they may move, go to a different school, or part ways and stay outta touch. Other times you wish they wouldn't do the actions they plan to do, did, or they've actually regretted themselves. Well then, this obviously tests how strong our friendships are and what lengths I'm willing to be with them. And unfortunately, I have parted from friendships whose arguments and disagreements couldn't be resolved. I guess i'll thank what i've learned them from those friendships. Note: I can't work with people who continously lie to me or just won't communicate with me at all.
But i'm even more humble and happy to have the friends who have stucked through with my craziness self, lol.
--Love interests: Now i know everyone who's ever known me and is interested about this topic will scoll here to this point, lol. Like that one soap opera hunk said on tv, "You gotta make yourself vulnerable sometime. Otherwise you'll never know." Or the late great Aaliyah says, " And if first you don't succeed... you can dust yourself off and try again."
Nothing is ever perfect in this department. Remember that. You will make mistakes ahahaha. Deal with it. There are healthy ways are there are unhealthy ways mind u.
I know rejection is a bad feeling going through it but I'd rather be with someone who would be mutually happy with me. Who knows when I'll ever date again. Since I'm not interested in anyboby right now (awww too bad ahahaha, j/k j/k), I'm happy where i'm at right now and supporting friends who want to put themselves out there and be vulnerable.
--Self: My own worst enemy. The doubts that my mind tricks plays. That I've never good enough or that the end is near. Why is it so clouded? Why can't this pain of misery go away? I use to think of that until you actually do this thing that people can teach you but only you can apply for yourself. That is to love yourself, to take care of yourself and knowyou are good enough. That this thing called life is something very special. It's a long and continous process though. Whether you're religious or not, I still think people should make the most of their own life. When people pass away, you definitely can't have the same relationship as before. But I always like to think that there is a special place in my heart for everyone that's touched my life. Nobody can take that away from me. And like I said in my previous entry, I love the work i'm doing now and hopefully i'll continue to grow from it.
Summary of capitalism check: I mentioned a few topics and true to its word here's how capitalism affects each one.
family- i mentioned gambling already. friends- the idea of eating out all the time isn't always cuz we really want to. dang those tv, radio, and poster ads. love interests- ah valentines day, money, power, expensive clothing/make-up, etc. self- relying on only yourself to survive. Dang, like in reference to homer saying this to ned flanders in the simpsons: dang, stupid, sexy serg you were right about capitalism ahahaha!
Conclusion:
Well the entry has to end somewhere just like that party. Now it's time to go and work on my relationships!