Today I Went to Young Democrats...
As soon as I walked in the door was was greated so nicely. "What the hell are you doing here?" "Ostrow, seriously get out." "You can't be here!" Liberals are so nice. After I pushed through the swarm of communists, hippies, and "intellectuals", I realized that I was in the company of a fellow Republican.
Being the mindreader that he is, Eddy Faya knew why I was there. He told me that if I make one obnoxious comment, I will have to leave. I figured I only had one shot to address the entire group, but I might as well talk to the other people while Eddy can't hear.
Before the meeting I got to know who I would be with if my brain ever fell out and I wanted to join. I figured I might as well try to fit in.....
(To Dem #1) Me: So is the Communist revolution all planned out yet? I heard there were still a few kinks.
Dem #1: (Stern look of disgust and confusion)
(To Dem#2) Me: You know that Roberts guy is a big threat to us. He is way too conservative.
Dem #2: That's true. He could destroy this country.
Me: I think we ought to assassinate him while we still have a chance. Then we can get back to killing unborn children.
(To several Dems) Me: Are we finally going to admit that we hate black people?
At this point the meeting started. The crowd went silent to hear the manifesto.
Dem Leader #1: It's been a long summer.
Dem Leader #2: Hello everyone
Me: (Russian accent) Hello comrads.
Faya: You, out, now!
I left with my hands raised and my head high
Being the mindreader that he is, Eddy Faya knew why I was there. He told me that if I make one obnoxious comment, I will have to leave. I figured I only had one shot to address the entire group, but I might as well talk to the other people while Eddy can't hear.
Before the meeting I got to know who I would be with if my brain ever fell out and I wanted to join. I figured I might as well try to fit in.....
(To Dem #1) Me: So is the Communist revolution all planned out yet? I heard there were still a few kinks.
Dem #1: (Stern look of disgust and confusion)
(To Dem#2) Me: You know that Roberts guy is a big threat to us. He is way too conservative.
Dem #2: That's true. He could destroy this country.
Me: I think we ought to assassinate him while we still have a chance. Then we can get back to killing unborn children.
(To several Dems) Me: Are we finally going to admit that we hate black people?
At this point the meeting started. The crowd went silent to hear the manifesto.
Dem Leader #1: It's been a long summer.
Dem Leader #2: Hello everyone
Me: (Russian accent) Hello comrads.
Faya: You, out, now!
I left with my hands raised and my head high