?
okay so yea..we discussed it or wutever a couple of hours ago. n i was so freaking happy a/b that conversation cuz i felt sooo incredibly like..content with wat's gonna happen..like..had 0 doubts and everything kool. i hung up n i was like yay. everything's okay.
but everything's not okay. it's just not. i read something..something that wasn't there b4 the conversation took place..and it resparked all the doubts n everything else i was feeling.
my pessimism is making me sick, but i can't help it. n it sux cuz i'm usually a really optimistic person a/b everything. but the only "bright side" to this is wat follows those days that i dread to come but am anticipating with utter excitement, all the while..
ugh. lol. wutever man..i can't be n a bummy mood for 2 long. i'm just gonna put it outta my head n see how things go until then. if they don't work out..then swell, i'll have absolutely nothing to worry a/b..but if they do..then whoa. i'monna drive myself crazy while over-analyzing every detail of the situation..wow..i can't wait?! (um..not) lol..
nobody probably has ANY idea a/b wut i'm talking a/b. but it's okay..my journal = i have the right to write my thoughts @ the moment n not worry a/b if ppl "get" it or not.
anywho..
right now i'd usually say that i love beauty or something retarded like that, which would in turn leave a lotta ppl who aren't "in" on the whole thing..really confused..but i'm not gonna say that 2nyt..cuz i'm gonna stop pushing for this..like i said..i'm just gonna c how things pan out..n let all the details fall as they may..and instead..2nyt..i'monna say..
JESUS ROX MY WORLD! yes!
.:bye:.
but everything's not okay. it's just not. i read something..something that wasn't there b4 the conversation took place..and it resparked all the doubts n everything else i was feeling.
my pessimism is making me sick, but i can't help it. n it sux cuz i'm usually a really optimistic person a/b everything. but the only "bright side" to this is wat follows those days that i dread to come but am anticipating with utter excitement, all the while..
ugh. lol. wutever man..i can't be n a bummy mood for 2 long. i'm just gonna put it outta my head n see how things go until then. if they don't work out..then swell, i'll have absolutely nothing to worry a/b..but if they do..then whoa. i'monna drive myself crazy while over-analyzing every detail of the situation..wow..i can't wait?! (um..not) lol..
nobody probably has ANY idea a/b wut i'm talking a/b. but it's okay..my journal = i have the right to write my thoughts @ the moment n not worry a/b if ppl "get" it or not.
anywho..
right now i'd usually say that i love beauty or something retarded like that, which would in turn leave a lotta ppl who aren't "in" on the whole thing..really confused..but i'm not gonna say that 2nyt..cuz i'm gonna stop pushing for this..like i said..i'm just gonna c how things pan out..n let all the details fall as they may..and instead..2nyt..i'monna say..
JESUS ROX MY WORLD! yes!
.:bye:.