Hurt.
So...
I'm a mess. I'm feeling myself tense up right now. I hate being sad and yet I find myself almost always unhappy. I feel like something's wrong with me like I could never be completely happy. Well, I guess this time around, I do have a reason to be unhappy.
I had dinner with Jose earlier last night and he wanted to call it quits. We were nearing our one year (in June) but I guess we couldn't make it.
What can I say about our relationship? In ways, it has probably been the one that has helped me mature and understand that dynamics of relationships in general the most. It helped me to better understand give and take, how real it's been. ::Sigh::
It hasn't really hit me yet...This is hard.
So I sit here and think about all the stupid shit that happened between us and realized how trivial a lot of it was. I think about the times I got upset for stupid reasons. I think about the times I could have been there for him better. I wonder what went so wrong...it felt like things were going great; that I didn't really see an end in sight. It's hard believe that this is it...
I'm a mess. I'm feeling myself tense up right now. I hate being sad and yet I find myself almost always unhappy. I feel like something's wrong with me like I could never be completely happy. Well, I guess this time around, I do have a reason to be unhappy.
I had dinner with Jose earlier last night and he wanted to call it quits. We were nearing our one year (in June) but I guess we couldn't make it.
What can I say about our relationship? In ways, it has probably been the one that has helped me mature and understand that dynamics of relationships in general the most. It helped me to better understand give and take, how real it's been. ::Sigh::
It hasn't really hit me yet...This is hard.
So I sit here and think about all the stupid shit that happened between us and realized how trivial a lot of it was. I think about the times I got upset for stupid reasons. I think about the times I could have been there for him better. I wonder what went so wrong...it felt like things were going great; that I didn't really see an end in sight. It's hard believe that this is it...