(no subject)
How often must it be the case that we look at children and see that they are compliantly doing their schoolwork or their chores, or whatever. "Ah," we say to ourselves, "they are highly motivated," and we think all is well. But maybe we should take another look and ask ourselves whether they are really doing it of their own volition, whether they are doing it with a sense of personal endorsement. If they are, all probably is well. But they may instead be introjected, working hard because they think they should and think they will gain approval by doing so. If so, these children may be hurting deep inside. The internal pressure to perform, which may look so good at first glance, will extract a significant price.
The compliance of these youngsters can work against them in various ways. Of course they will lack the vitality and enthusiasm that makes school a joyful experience, but an even sadder outcome is that it gets them focused on trying to please others rather than fining out what is right for themselves. Furthermore, in classrooms, these quiet, compliant students are often considered model students, so they are ignored-successful cases that need little attention. (Those who are noisy and defiant, in contrast get a great deal of attention.) It may be a tragedy that these compliant students command so little attention, for the feelings they may hold deep within themselves-feelings of inadequacy, for example-deserve concern. These feelings can easily result from partial internalization-from introjection rather than integration-for when people introject rules and evaluations, they often feel that they cannot live up to them no matter how hard they try.
Edward Deci
The compliance of these youngsters can work against them in various ways. Of course they will lack the vitality and enthusiasm that makes school a joyful experience, but an even sadder outcome is that it gets them focused on trying to please others rather than fining out what is right for themselves. Furthermore, in classrooms, these quiet, compliant students are often considered model students, so they are ignored-successful cases that need little attention. (Those who are noisy and defiant, in contrast get a great deal of attention.) It may be a tragedy that these compliant students command so little attention, for the feelings they may hold deep within themselves-feelings of inadequacy, for example-deserve concern. These feelings can easily result from partial internalization-from introjection rather than integration-for when people introject rules and evaluations, they often feel that they cannot live up to them no matter how hard they try.
Edward Deci