One Pastafarian's Guide to Reacting to the Rapture
Scenario 1: Rapture occurs, you are raptured.
Response: Laugh at the assholes who said you were going to hell because you were a non-believer.
Scenario 2: Rapture occurs, you are not raptured.
Response: Laugh at the assholes who said you were going to hell since they're still here too.
Scenario 3: Rapture doesn't occur.
Response: Laugh at the assholes who tried to scare you into believing with tales of post-Rapture horror.
Scenario 4: Rapture occurs, no one knows because no one was raptured.
Response: Wait for the apocalypse, then laugh at the assholes who weren't pure enough either.
This has been One Pastafarian's Guide to Reacting to the Rapture. And remember, the Pastafarian heaven has a beer volcano and a stripper factory. As does the Pastafarian hell (but the beer is flat and the strippers have STDs).
Response: Laugh at the assholes who said you were going to hell because you were a non-believer.
Scenario 2: Rapture occurs, you are not raptured.
Response: Laugh at the assholes who said you were going to hell since they're still here too.
Scenario 3: Rapture doesn't occur.
Response: Laugh at the assholes who tried to scare you into believing with tales of post-Rapture horror.
Scenario 4: Rapture occurs, no one knows because no one was raptured.
Response: Wait for the apocalypse, then laugh at the assholes who weren't pure enough either.
This has been One Pastafarian's Guide to Reacting to the Rapture. And remember, the Pastafarian heaven has a beer volcano and a stripper factory. As does the Pastafarian hell (but the beer is flat and the strippers have STDs).