He is capable of rationality and logical thinking in problem solving, but he doesn't use the same objective logic on himself. And that's such a tragic human failing.
The mutiny is a perfect example of this. If you asked Lee now if he felt he did the right thing siding with the president or, more precisely, office of the president, I think he would say yes. Even Adama has seen that he overreacted and there exists a need for a civilian government. At the same time, even though his ideological beliefs will tell him that he acted as he should have, the personal issues he's had and continues to have will cause him to cast doubt upon himself.
Adama commands a lot of respect and it has nothing to do with rank. People don't question his judgement even if perhaps they should at times (as Lee did in RS Pt2) whereas Lee's decisions are constantly second guessed and he often feels he stands alone. I believe that's why he felt so sucker punched when discovering Roslin initiated the assasination plot because he believed they were nearly always on the same page. Lee's an emotional guy even if he chooses not to show it. With another person he loves and trusts not seeing the situation as he does, his hurt disallusionment would lead him to question what failing in him leads him down such a differnt path.
In a way his 'death' completed a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy about himself. He thinks of himself as someone who doesn't live up to others' expectations and since dying resulted in him letting Kara down so drastically, his negative and distorted self-perceptions would have felt justified in his 'final' moments.
Wow. I hadn't thought about that. It's a great observation. And I do feel Lee often traps himself in a cycle self-loathing.
(Btw, your icon is gorgeous and I adore the Lee banner on your LJ--it is so beautiful. I hope you don't mind if I go and stare at it again!)
Hee! I actually had to check which icon I used here since I think about 70% of mine are Bamber related. ;)
And I don't mind you staring at my banner at all (it's courtesy of sdwolfpup :). It's one reason I look forward to opening up LJ everyday. ;)
I agree with everything you say above about Lee. He feels things deeply--not just that, but he thinks about them deeply and explores them fully as well. So, yes, I think he would have interpreted Roslin not confiding in him as evidence of personal failing and also he would feel so alone and lost.
Good point about Adama in comparison to Lee as well. I see how everyone *needs* to believe in Adama's strength even when he acts out of line, but it's not necessarily right or fair. Lee is far more often questioned, second-guessed and attacked for his actions. When he's already doing all that to himself anyway!
The mutiny is a perfect example of this. If you asked Lee now if he felt he did the right thing siding with the president or, more precisely, office of the president, I think he would say yes. Even Adama has seen that he overreacted and there exists a need for a civilian government. At the same time, even though his ideological beliefs will tell him that he acted as he should have, the personal issues he's had and continues to have will cause him to cast doubt upon himself.
Adama commands a lot of respect and it has nothing to do with rank. People don't question his judgement even if perhaps they should at times (as Lee did in RS Pt2) whereas Lee's decisions are constantly second guessed and he often feels he stands alone. I believe that's why he felt so sucker punched when discovering Roslin initiated the assasination plot because he believed they were nearly always on the same page. Lee's an emotional guy even if he chooses not to show it. With another person he loves and trusts not seeing the situation as he does, his hurt disallusionment would lead him to question what failing in him leads him down such a differnt path.
In a way his 'death' completed a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy about himself. He thinks of himself as someone who doesn't live up to others' expectations and since dying resulted in him letting Kara down so drastically, his negative and distorted self-perceptions would have felt justified in his 'final' moments.
Wow. I hadn't thought about that. It's a great observation. And I do feel Lee often traps himself in a cycle self-loathing.
(Btw, your icon is gorgeous and I adore the Lee banner on your LJ--it is so beautiful. I hope you don't mind if I go and stare at it again!)
Hee! I actually had to check which icon I used here since I think about 70% of mine are Bamber related. ;)
And I don't mind you staring at my banner at all (it's courtesy of sdwolfpup :). It's one reason I look forward to opening up LJ everyday. ;)
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Good point about Adama in comparison to Lee as well. I see how everyone *needs* to believe in Adama's strength even when he acts out of line, but it's not necessarily right or fair. Lee is far more often questioned, second-guessed and attacked for his actions. When he's already doing all that to himself anyway!
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