COOKING LIKE SHIT
Diane’s cooking used to be adequate.
No one ever left a dinner party from her home of 20 years saying “That was the best meatloaf I think I have ever had.” Her dinner guests would eat and compliment. Deep down she knew…her cooking skills needed some help. The spices and preparations she had been taught over the years just were not enough.
Over the years, she went to cooking demonstrations, read cookbooks, and watched Food Network like most women watch soap operas. Rachel Ray and Emeril always having their own special brand of Yummo or Bamm…that just seemed to elevate their cooking. She wanted the glam and sparkle of being a unique voice in the kitchen. She could never find her voice.
Then on a trip to her local supermarket she saw the set of spices. Her inner monologue went crazy.
“Can you believe this shit? Is this shit real? Will this shit really make my food elevate in flavor?”
Even as she drove home muttering under her breath, “Did I just buy some crappy shit?”
That night after preparing her normal porkchop recipe, she added some special shit to her sauce. After letting it simmer for a while, she took a taste. This was some good shit. She put the plate of pork chop with shit spice in front of her husband. After his first bite, his face lit up with delight.
“Diane my dear this is some delicious shit…”
She went back to the grocery shelf and bought every kind of shit she could find. Now when there are dinner guests they are excited about the new shit Diane had been preparing. After all, Diane’s shit was some of the best in town. People don’t tell shit about good shit after all.
After that day, Diane prided herself in coming up with a culinary rainbow of shit to serve her guests.
Anything was possible now.
"This is an actual company with a real website: http://www.specialshit.com"