Four Score
Never miss those in your past, there's a reason they're not in your future
We all have a friend that, as a child, we were inseparable with but, as life came along, we grew apart. Let's call them "Entry Level Friends" (Boomadagreat Trademark)
My friend Jeff is one of my many "Entry Level Friends".
From 6th grade to the summer between senior year in high school and college, he was in my real life "top 8" (Myspace Trademark). We were both G/T kids so we always had all the same classes and played a lot of sports, so we were always at each other's houses doing projects, working on skills, lifting weights, and just plain, dumb, kid shit.
What I enjoyed most about the friendship was that Jeff was genially nice and unassuming. Many people lay claim to such adjectives, but they're usually self-serving or have some other agenda. Not Jeff. He was genuinely interested in doing the right thing because it was the right thing, and giving onto his friends because he could and didn't really need a lot.
He was one of the few non-hypocritical Catholics I've ever met.
I'm not sure what happened in college.
I had other friends that went to UMD with whom I'm still close. I had other friends that dedicated themselves to their studies, drinking, sports, and relationships (all of which Jeff did with utmost passion and intensity at different intervals throughout his college life, like all of us).
Though, something happened...
The first time we hung out again, like old times, was on my 21st birthday. He was the same guy, but a little more bitter, a little more aware of the fact that nothing gold can stay... We shared a fifth of Kentucky Gentleman watching everyone else have more fun than us. We commiserated about dead grandparents, failed relationships, confusing majors/life directions, and just plain, dumb college kid shit.
What I enjoyed most was the lack of pretenses. Neither of us made those shallow excuses for the absence nor made false promises to not let it happen again. Some people may think that's just laziness or taking friendship for granted. Perhaps it is, but maintaining is hard enough without adding in restoration.
I saw him again last night. My one friend had come home after a year away, spent through europe in Law School. I'd seen Jeff various times over the last three years since our last heart-to-heart, but all those were empty, small talk conversations that never touch the realms of relevance. I found him to be more warm and humorous. Though, his bitterness had spilled over into cynicism... He railed against unions and solidarity, which made it hard to remember that this was the guy who had gave me rides to and from school (going out of his way) when i didn't have a car in high school, and that this was the guy who had convinced his then-girlfriend to find a friend for me to go to Homecoming Dance with after i had alienated the majority of girls at our high school.
Though, it seemed he was doing well in his life (good job, good relationship, etc.) and we're both at better places, overall. I still missed my old friend and our adventures. I imagine its how the upper management guy sorta reminisces about entry level days... in hindsight, being poor wasn't such a drag.
These times they are a-changin'...
We all have a friend that, as a child, we were inseparable with but, as life came along, we grew apart. Let's call them "Entry Level Friends" (Boomadagreat Trademark)
My friend Jeff is one of my many "Entry Level Friends".
From 6th grade to the summer between senior year in high school and college, he was in my real life "top 8" (Myspace Trademark). We were both G/T kids so we always had all the same classes and played a lot of sports, so we were always at each other's houses doing projects, working on skills, lifting weights, and just plain, dumb, kid shit.
What I enjoyed most about the friendship was that Jeff was genially nice and unassuming. Many people lay claim to such adjectives, but they're usually self-serving or have some other agenda. Not Jeff. He was genuinely interested in doing the right thing because it was the right thing, and giving onto his friends because he could and didn't really need a lot.
He was one of the few non-hypocritical Catholics I've ever met.
I'm not sure what happened in college.
I had other friends that went to UMD with whom I'm still close. I had other friends that dedicated themselves to their studies, drinking, sports, and relationships (all of which Jeff did with utmost passion and intensity at different intervals throughout his college life, like all of us).
Though, something happened...
The first time we hung out again, like old times, was on my 21st birthday. He was the same guy, but a little more bitter, a little more aware of the fact that nothing gold can stay... We shared a fifth of Kentucky Gentleman watching everyone else have more fun than us. We commiserated about dead grandparents, failed relationships, confusing majors/life directions, and just plain, dumb college kid shit.
What I enjoyed most was the lack of pretenses. Neither of us made those shallow excuses for the absence nor made false promises to not let it happen again. Some people may think that's just laziness or taking friendship for granted. Perhaps it is, but maintaining is hard enough without adding in restoration.
I saw him again last night. My one friend had come home after a year away, spent through europe in Law School. I'd seen Jeff various times over the last three years since our last heart-to-heart, but all those were empty, small talk conversations that never touch the realms of relevance. I found him to be more warm and humorous. Though, his bitterness had spilled over into cynicism... He railed against unions and solidarity, which made it hard to remember that this was the guy who had gave me rides to and from school (going out of his way) when i didn't have a car in high school, and that this was the guy who had convinced his then-girlfriend to find a friend for me to go to Homecoming Dance with after i had alienated the majority of girls at our high school.
Though, it seemed he was doing well in his life (good job, good relationship, etc.) and we're both at better places, overall. I still missed my old friend and our adventures. I imagine its how the upper management guy sorta reminisces about entry level days... in hindsight, being poor wasn't such a drag.
These times they are a-changin'...