Confectionery snobbery
I started my resolution yesterday by answering this question. Today I'm not channeling the good doctors, so I shall instead pastiche wine and chocolate (along with any other kinds of) afficionados. (It's all meant in good fun, rebeccmeister, honest.)
Our subject this evening is the lowly Pez candy. Though accused by plebeians of simply being sugar pressed into hard pellets, that is simply because they have not properly partaken of their confection. Any brute can rip open a foil package and devour the insides. But Pez rise into their glory when the tasting ritual is observed.
First off, a proper storage vessel is needed. Just as discerning palates would not dream of drinking coffee from a styrofoam cup, nor beer from a can, one should not consider sampling Pez from anything but its dispenser. Any dispenser will do, in general; however, each dispenser was specially chosen to provide the ideal complement for the candies with which it is packaged, so you should resist the temptation to use those candies in another dispenser.
Loading the dispenser is a ritual unto itself. Prepare the dispenser by holding the "body" in your dominant hand, and the "head" in your off hand. Stretch with a quick, delicate motion; you want it to be fast enough to latch the dispenser open, but not so forceful as to unbalance the spring and spoil the storage of the candies. With this done, lay the dispenser on its back, with its head remaining nearest your off hand, so it does not obstruct your dominant hand in the next step.
With the dispenser ready, you can prepare and load the candy. Prepare it by easing open the ends of the foil package using a Pez knife -- a small flat-headed screwdriver or a fingernail will do in a pinch -- and then grasping the package, by the ends, between the thumb and middle finger of your dominant hand. Thus grasped, you can easily use your off hand to expose the narrow ends of the candy. DO NOT unwrap the candy more than one quarter of the way! You need to preserve the body of the aroma by keeping the candy covered until you insert it into the dispenser.
One you have eased the unwrapped candy end into the dispenser, you can gently remove the paper. This cannot be stressed enough; to avoid agitating the candy and disrupting the flavour, you need to be gentle. Only then, once the paper is removed, can you ease the dispenser closed again. The empty wrapper may be discarded, though it is considered a sign of poor class if you do not fold it into halves lengthwise, and then quarters, first.
Now the candy needs to settle and age, in order to bring out its optimum flavour. Those dispensers which are designed to stand upright should be stored in that position; others should be kept on their back, with the narrow end upon the table and the neck facing upwards. It is generally agreed that Pez should be aged for no less than five minutes before tasting. As you become a more experienced taster, you will learn the optimum amount of aging required to bring out the most flavour in each particular packet of candy.
The moment of triumph is the tasting. Hold the dispenser between the thumb and middle finger of your off hand (you may use additional fingers for stability, though a raised pinkie is considered continental), and use your index finger to ease the dispenser's "head" away from you, exposing a single pearl of confectionery delight at its neck. Take the candy between the thumb and middle finger of your dominant hand, and place it on your extended tongue. Draw your tongue back into your mouth, and give the candy a moment to breathe on your palate, to let you savour its aroma (also known as its air). After you have discerned its air, you may roll it about the tongue, to explore the aspect of its flavour known as its body.
Strategies differ at this point. Some like to suck on the candy in this matter until it vanishes completely, claiming this brings out the full subtleties of the confection. Others insist that the full flavour can only be freed by crushing the candy with the molars when it has shrunk to no less than half its original size. This is a highly personal matter, and you need to experiment with both techniques in order to determine your own tastes.
Two final notes: Wait at least a minute between finishing one candy, and tasting the next, to give your tongue time to recover. You do not wish to overload your senses, causing your most sensitive sensory organ to throttle back its taste capacity in self-defence, and robbing you of the full range of aromas provided by every candy. For the same reason, do not eat more than one candy at a time.
Now that you know the proper way to enjoy a Pez, you can practice tasting them. They will all taste the same when you start your sweet journey to enlightenment, but soon you will be able to distinguish candies which were brought to life in Pez's homeland of Austria from those in the newer American facilities, discern the year of pressing, and perhaps even select optimum food pairings for each batch.
~*~*~*~
Of course, in actuality, Pez goes against many of the values I hold dear nowadays. Both the candy and the dispensers are overpackaged, and the dispensers encourage the amassing of trash by promoting collection of fancily-painted plastic with no practical use. (Pez has some sheer marketing geniuses on their staff.) But I've received one for Christmas or a birthday just about annually for as long as I can remember, and I have to admit to enjoying the experience. Besides, sometimes the dispenser (like the polar bear I got this year for Christmas) is kind of cute.
I went over the top with my writing, of course; I'm not that passionate about Pez. It was inspired by the aforementioned Christmas gift, and a memory of my buddy Len saying that the candies taste better from the dispenser.
Our subject this evening is the lowly Pez candy. Though accused by plebeians of simply being sugar pressed into hard pellets, that is simply because they have not properly partaken of their confection. Any brute can rip open a foil package and devour the insides. But Pez rise into their glory when the tasting ritual is observed.
First off, a proper storage vessel is needed. Just as discerning palates would not dream of drinking coffee from a styrofoam cup, nor beer from a can, one should not consider sampling Pez from anything but its dispenser. Any dispenser will do, in general; however, each dispenser was specially chosen to provide the ideal complement for the candies with which it is packaged, so you should resist the temptation to use those candies in another dispenser.
Loading the dispenser is a ritual unto itself. Prepare the dispenser by holding the "body" in your dominant hand, and the "head" in your off hand. Stretch with a quick, delicate motion; you want it to be fast enough to latch the dispenser open, but not so forceful as to unbalance the spring and spoil the storage of the candies. With this done, lay the dispenser on its back, with its head remaining nearest your off hand, so it does not obstruct your dominant hand in the next step.
With the dispenser ready, you can prepare and load the candy. Prepare it by easing open the ends of the foil package using a Pez knife -- a small flat-headed screwdriver or a fingernail will do in a pinch -- and then grasping the package, by the ends, between the thumb and middle finger of your dominant hand. Thus grasped, you can easily use your off hand to expose the narrow ends of the candy. DO NOT unwrap the candy more than one quarter of the way! You need to preserve the body of the aroma by keeping the candy covered until you insert it into the dispenser.
One you have eased the unwrapped candy end into the dispenser, you can gently remove the paper. This cannot be stressed enough; to avoid agitating the candy and disrupting the flavour, you need to be gentle. Only then, once the paper is removed, can you ease the dispenser closed again. The empty wrapper may be discarded, though it is considered a sign of poor class if you do not fold it into halves lengthwise, and then quarters, first.
Now the candy needs to settle and age, in order to bring out its optimum flavour. Those dispensers which are designed to stand upright should be stored in that position; others should be kept on their back, with the narrow end upon the table and the neck facing upwards. It is generally agreed that Pez should be aged for no less than five minutes before tasting. As you become a more experienced taster, you will learn the optimum amount of aging required to bring out the most flavour in each particular packet of candy.
The moment of triumph is the tasting. Hold the dispenser between the thumb and middle finger of your off hand (you may use additional fingers for stability, though a raised pinkie is considered continental), and use your index finger to ease the dispenser's "head" away from you, exposing a single pearl of confectionery delight at its neck. Take the candy between the thumb and middle finger of your dominant hand, and place it on your extended tongue. Draw your tongue back into your mouth, and give the candy a moment to breathe on your palate, to let you savour its aroma (also known as its air). After you have discerned its air, you may roll it about the tongue, to explore the aspect of its flavour known as its body.
Strategies differ at this point. Some like to suck on the candy in this matter until it vanishes completely, claiming this brings out the full subtleties of the confection. Others insist that the full flavour can only be freed by crushing the candy with the molars when it has shrunk to no less than half its original size. This is a highly personal matter, and you need to experiment with both techniques in order to determine your own tastes.
Two final notes: Wait at least a minute between finishing one candy, and tasting the next, to give your tongue time to recover. You do not wish to overload your senses, causing your most sensitive sensory organ to throttle back its taste capacity in self-defence, and robbing you of the full range of aromas provided by every candy. For the same reason, do not eat more than one candy at a time.
Now that you know the proper way to enjoy a Pez, you can practice tasting them. They will all taste the same when you start your sweet journey to enlightenment, but soon you will be able to distinguish candies which were brought to life in Pez's homeland of Austria from those in the newer American facilities, discern the year of pressing, and perhaps even select optimum food pairings for each batch.
~*~*~*~
Of course, in actuality, Pez goes against many of the values I hold dear nowadays. Both the candy and the dispensers are overpackaged, and the dispensers encourage the amassing of trash by promoting collection of fancily-painted plastic with no practical use. (Pez has some sheer marketing geniuses on their staff.) But I've received one for Christmas or a birthday just about annually for as long as I can remember, and I have to admit to enjoying the experience. Besides, sometimes the dispenser (like the polar bear I got this year for Christmas) is kind of cute.
I went over the top with my writing, of course; I'm not that passionate about Pez. It was inspired by the aforementioned Christmas gift, and a memory of my buddy Len saying that the candies taste better from the dispenser.