Iowa...
On my way to Chapel Hill in about an hour, yay to getting out of Iowa.
I had a lot of fun here but also learned a lot ie never ever missing Christmas again, or the family reunion or preferrably New Years. I miss my family and Sacramento and it's not worth it, even though it did give me some props here for staying and being one of the out of state volunteers who stayed the longest and I probably learned more because of it.
No real desire to ever go back to this crazy state, as a volunteer you basically get treated like a non-human entity, which fine whatever but now its over and I'm out of here, with no real desire to volunteer anywhere for awhile, particularly anywhere out of state. Go John Edwards but my enthusiasm only lasts as long as there's food around, I've eaten more Cheetos and pizza this week than I really care to dwell on. I'm done with canvassing for six hours in - degrees, and being told I'm a silly California Girl because I don't like weather where I have to look like a gigantic marshmallow, and never did find boots so my feet always end in ice. I can leave the cracked lips and dry skin behind, as well as the room WITHOUT HEAT, and the boss who forgets to bring the heater back from the office (where there is heat btw). I'm done with worrying how I'm going to get home, either to Raleigh or to Sacramento because one ride flaked or another, and I was going to get a ride from the Texas people before they started freaking me out by telling me that I'm a bitch because I reminded them to recycle on their first day, and stand in the wrong place, and them threatening to leave me on the road, maybe with, maybe without my stuff.
There's a debate tonight so I may not be able to find a ride to the office at 2 in the afternoon, which is okay. Everyone here was told to go to Nevada or South Carolina and there's no real choice in the matter, and unlike here where I didn't know where the Des Moines office was, in Chapel Hill I actually do and know that someone will give a DAMN when I get there, and its work I actually enjoy believe it or not unlike voter contact that oftentimes made me want to smack something after 8 straight hours of phone calls that were never quite enough.
I'm okay being in a tiny town that has a coffee shop and a health food store and a bookstore, with Beth and Sara and Jessica and Matt who will be crazy busy but will be people, and care, not necessarily about me but about everything else. I'm tired of Elise who didn't care and Steve who seemed nice and ended up just trying to use the opportunity to get lucky, which is fine in theory and in reality is just sort of annoying when he leaves me at a random prescinct in Cedar Falls and Elise fails to answer her phone.
It's not perfect, it's not idealistic and fanciful and I'll still end up working my tail off without any real rewards but I can have a bed to sleep in, in a heated apartment, wearing only two layers and not five so score. I miss Sara and Jessica and Beth in our little closet of Correspondence, and warmth and diet pepsi. I want to be helpful and not in the way as much as possible, and hopefully it'll work out that I can do that there, at this point its funny so it's fine.
I had a lot of fun here but also learned a lot ie never ever missing Christmas again, or the family reunion or preferrably New Years. I miss my family and Sacramento and it's not worth it, even though it did give me some props here for staying and being one of the out of state volunteers who stayed the longest and I probably learned more because of it.
No real desire to ever go back to this crazy state, as a volunteer you basically get treated like a non-human entity, which fine whatever but now its over and I'm out of here, with no real desire to volunteer anywhere for awhile, particularly anywhere out of state. Go John Edwards but my enthusiasm only lasts as long as there's food around, I've eaten more Cheetos and pizza this week than I really care to dwell on. I'm done with canvassing for six hours in - degrees, and being told I'm a silly California Girl because I don't like weather where I have to look like a gigantic marshmallow, and never did find boots so my feet always end in ice. I can leave the cracked lips and dry skin behind, as well as the room WITHOUT HEAT, and the boss who forgets to bring the heater back from the office (where there is heat btw). I'm done with worrying how I'm going to get home, either to Raleigh or to Sacramento because one ride flaked or another, and I was going to get a ride from the Texas people before they started freaking me out by telling me that I'm a bitch because I reminded them to recycle on their first day, and stand in the wrong place, and them threatening to leave me on the road, maybe with, maybe without my stuff.
There's a debate tonight so I may not be able to find a ride to the office at 2 in the afternoon, which is okay. Everyone here was told to go to Nevada or South Carolina and there's no real choice in the matter, and unlike here where I didn't know where the Des Moines office was, in Chapel Hill I actually do and know that someone will give a DAMN when I get there, and its work I actually enjoy believe it or not unlike voter contact that oftentimes made me want to smack something after 8 straight hours of phone calls that were never quite enough.
I'm okay being in a tiny town that has a coffee shop and a health food store and a bookstore, with Beth and Sara and Jessica and Matt who will be crazy busy but will be people, and care, not necessarily about me but about everything else. I'm tired of Elise who didn't care and Steve who seemed nice and ended up just trying to use the opportunity to get lucky, which is fine in theory and in reality is just sort of annoying when he leaves me at a random prescinct in Cedar Falls and Elise fails to answer her phone.
It's not perfect, it's not idealistic and fanciful and I'll still end up working my tail off without any real rewards but I can have a bed to sleep in, in a heated apartment, wearing only two layers and not five so score. I miss Sara and Jessica and Beth in our little closet of Correspondence, and warmth and diet pepsi. I want to be helpful and not in the way as much as possible, and hopefully it'll work out that I can do that there, at this point its funny so it's fine.