(no subject)
Title: Bleeding Truth 2/?
Rating: Pg-13
Warnings/Spoilers: Violence
Summary: Merlin is outed as a sorcerer and Arthur reacts violently. The Prince then tries to move on with his life but Merlin appears everywhere he turns.
Arthur had rarely been touched.
As Crown Prince, a distance was kept from even the closest of his knights - they only touched during training, the brief brush of bodies, the impact of blows against flesh. Their only contact was for training in battle.
His father had rarely shown physical affection, even when Arthur was a child. Uther was the King; the respect and distance required of a sovereign and his subject took precedence over the bond between father and son. Arthur could barely remember a time when his Father had gripped his shoulder in affection. His father loved him, Arthur had no doubts about that, but every conversation and every dinner was now a testing of Arthur's ability to rule.
Enemies of the kingdom had tried their best to kill him. Blades and fists had made their marks upon his body, telling their story in the criss-cross of their scars. Arthur had grasped the hands of his knights as they died, closed the eyes of slaughtered villagers and carried the screaming wounded in the process of battle. He had never blinked.
Servants had always kept their distance. Their obeisance to the Crown Prince meant even when dressing him or lacing his armour they made as little contact as possible, hands touching clothing but always being careful not to touch flesh.
The Crown Prince was the one who was touched. Arthur was forgotten, buried beneath the trappings of power and responsibility.
Then Merlin had bounded into his life and changed all that.
The boy had had no idea of what was proper. From grabbing Arthur's arm, to swatting his head, to going for a hug - a hug! What did he think Arthur was, a girl? - Merlin had not only bypassed but shattered the invisible line always drawn between the Crown Prince and his subjects. He only acknowledged the presence of Arthur - contributing a great deal to his familiarity with the stocks, Arthur thought dryly - and treated him the same as any other, being as tactile as possible in showing his affection, irritation and loyalty. In hindsight, with the way Merlin broadcasted his every emotion and reaction through his body language it was astonishing that Arthur had not realised his secret earlier.
Before Merlin, Arthur had never realised the only time he was touched was for the purpose of war and pain.
All this ran through Arthur's head as half supporting Rolph with his arm, he rapped on Gaius’s door and waited. It was a while before he heard the old physician’s shuffling footsteps.
“Your Highness,” Gaius said wearily upon opening the door. He did everything wearily these days, Merlin’s loss etched deep into the lines on his face. His gaze sharpened as the Prince brought Rolph forwards.
“Put him by the table,” Gaius instructed. He limped over to the side of the chair as Arthur boosted Rolph into a sitting position. The boy was pale, breath coming in little gasps as every movement jarred his injured shoulder. Arthur laid a comforting hand on his good arm as Gaius peeled back the makeshift bandage.
“Still alive then?” he had asked. “Just about,” replied Merlin, cheeky grin on his face.
Enough! Rolph grunted in protest as Arthur’s fingers clenched too hard and the prince jerked back as if burned. He cursed his traitorous mind as he turned away and threw himself in the other remaining chair, staring at the two without seeing. The familiar scene was dragging up thoughts Arthur had tried desperately to forget.
Rolph hissed and flinched as Gaius’s fingers probed the wound. The prince continued to brood quietly from his chair as Gaius re-wrapped the shoulder with a fresh poultice and tied it off tightly.
“The treatment you gave him was good- there appears to be no sign of infection,” Gaius said to Arthur. “And you boy - you should not use that arm for a number of weeks, and any sign of redness or fluid and I want you to come straight to me, you understand?”
Rolph nodded dutifully and closed his eyes. Arthur felt guilty at the exhausted pain on the boy’s features. He was no knight-what he had done for Arthur was above and beyond the call of duty.
“I owe you a boon, Rolph,” Arthur said carefully. The boy opened his eyes and looked at Arthur sharply. “If there is something you require that is within my power to give, you have earned it with your actions.”
The boy looked nervous. He clenched his hands within his lap and opened and shut his mouth a few times before appearing to rethink it. He shook his head as he stared at the ground.
“What is it? I promise you can ask freely without fear of reprisal,” Arthur said gently. “If it is something I am unable to give, I will tell you and there will be no consequences.”
The boy seemed to struggle with himself for a minute before raising his eyes to Arthur’s defiantly. “Will you answer a question?” he asked.
“If it is within my power,” Arthur replied.
The sun through the window reflected off Rolph’s eyes and for a second Arthur could have sworn they glowed gold. But then the boy blinked and the reflection - was that what it was? - was gone. He raised his chin bravely and his next words wiped any thought of odd lights from Arthur’s mind.
“Did you kill your last servant, sire?”
__________________________________________________________________
Arthur froze. He felt more then heard Gaius’s gasp behind him and the rattle as the old physician supported his suddenly shaking legs on a shelf.
Merlin weeping on the forest floor, face obscured by the blood streaming from his wound. A wound by Arthur’s hand…
Rolph must have seen something in his eyes because he shrunk back in the chair as far as his wounded shoulder would allow. “I’m sorry my lord, its just the servants’ talk, and I was so afraid, and you were so good to me…” he babbled fearfully. “I just wanted to know, I was afraid, please don’t hurt me my lord please don’t please…I’m sorry, I’m sorry I’m sorry…”
Arthur managed to raise his hand to stem the boy’s flurried stream of apologies. The terror on the boys face struck a cold shard in his heart.
Merlin, eyes closed as he waited for his lord - his friend - to kill him without a thought.
Is this who I am?
“I said there would be no repercussions. You have nothing to fear from me,” Arthur managed to choke from his frozen throat. The fear on the boy’s face eased slightly, but Arthur saw the wariness now that had been behind those perfect bows, that quiet service. The castle servants’ many questions about Merlin’s whereabouts. He buried his face in his hands, knowing by the heavy silence that Gaius was waiting for his answer. Was he really going to do this?
“No,” he said quietly, so quietly as not to be heard if the room had not been so deathly quiet. “I did not.”
The silence was smothering. Arthur lifted his head from his hands and met Gaius’s shocked eyes. The old physician was clutching at the robes above his heart.
“He betrayed me. He did something worthy of death.” Arthur’s gaze returned to Rolph, whose eyes were unreadable.
“But I did not kill him.”
And Arthur rose and left the room. He pretended not to hear the joyous sobs from behind the door as he left.
Or the hint of satisfaction on Rolph's face as he turned away.
Rating: Pg-13
Warnings/Spoilers: Violence
Summary: Merlin is outed as a sorcerer and Arthur reacts violently. The Prince then tries to move on with his life but Merlin appears everywhere he turns.
Arthur had rarely been touched.
As Crown Prince, a distance was kept from even the closest of his knights - they only touched during training, the brief brush of bodies, the impact of blows against flesh. Their only contact was for training in battle.
His father had rarely shown physical affection, even when Arthur was a child. Uther was the King; the respect and distance required of a sovereign and his subject took precedence over the bond between father and son. Arthur could barely remember a time when his Father had gripped his shoulder in affection. His father loved him, Arthur had no doubts about that, but every conversation and every dinner was now a testing of Arthur's ability to rule.
Enemies of the kingdom had tried their best to kill him. Blades and fists had made their marks upon his body, telling their story in the criss-cross of their scars. Arthur had grasped the hands of his knights as they died, closed the eyes of slaughtered villagers and carried the screaming wounded in the process of battle. He had never blinked.
Servants had always kept their distance. Their obeisance to the Crown Prince meant even when dressing him or lacing his armour they made as little contact as possible, hands touching clothing but always being careful not to touch flesh.
The Crown Prince was the one who was touched. Arthur was forgotten, buried beneath the trappings of power and responsibility.
Then Merlin had bounded into his life and changed all that.
The boy had had no idea of what was proper. From grabbing Arthur's arm, to swatting his head, to going for a hug - a hug! What did he think Arthur was, a girl? - Merlin had not only bypassed but shattered the invisible line always drawn between the Crown Prince and his subjects. He only acknowledged the presence of Arthur - contributing a great deal to his familiarity with the stocks, Arthur thought dryly - and treated him the same as any other, being as tactile as possible in showing his affection, irritation and loyalty. In hindsight, with the way Merlin broadcasted his every emotion and reaction through his body language it was astonishing that Arthur had not realised his secret earlier.
Before Merlin, Arthur had never realised the only time he was touched was for the purpose of war and pain.
All this ran through Arthur's head as half supporting Rolph with his arm, he rapped on Gaius’s door and waited. It was a while before he heard the old physician’s shuffling footsteps.
“Your Highness,” Gaius said wearily upon opening the door. He did everything wearily these days, Merlin’s loss etched deep into the lines on his face. His gaze sharpened as the Prince brought Rolph forwards.
“Put him by the table,” Gaius instructed. He limped over to the side of the chair as Arthur boosted Rolph into a sitting position. The boy was pale, breath coming in little gasps as every movement jarred his injured shoulder. Arthur laid a comforting hand on his good arm as Gaius peeled back the makeshift bandage.
“Still alive then?” he had asked. “Just about,” replied Merlin, cheeky grin on his face.
Enough! Rolph grunted in protest as Arthur’s fingers clenched too hard and the prince jerked back as if burned. He cursed his traitorous mind as he turned away and threw himself in the other remaining chair, staring at the two without seeing. The familiar scene was dragging up thoughts Arthur had tried desperately to forget.
Rolph hissed and flinched as Gaius’s fingers probed the wound. The prince continued to brood quietly from his chair as Gaius re-wrapped the shoulder with a fresh poultice and tied it off tightly.
“The treatment you gave him was good- there appears to be no sign of infection,” Gaius said to Arthur. “And you boy - you should not use that arm for a number of weeks, and any sign of redness or fluid and I want you to come straight to me, you understand?”
Rolph nodded dutifully and closed his eyes. Arthur felt guilty at the exhausted pain on the boy’s features. He was no knight-what he had done for Arthur was above and beyond the call of duty.
“I owe you a boon, Rolph,” Arthur said carefully. The boy opened his eyes and looked at Arthur sharply. “If there is something you require that is within my power to give, you have earned it with your actions.”
The boy looked nervous. He clenched his hands within his lap and opened and shut his mouth a few times before appearing to rethink it. He shook his head as he stared at the ground.
“What is it? I promise you can ask freely without fear of reprisal,” Arthur said gently. “If it is something I am unable to give, I will tell you and there will be no consequences.”
The boy seemed to struggle with himself for a minute before raising his eyes to Arthur’s defiantly. “Will you answer a question?” he asked.
“If it is within my power,” Arthur replied.
The sun through the window reflected off Rolph’s eyes and for a second Arthur could have sworn they glowed gold. But then the boy blinked and the reflection - was that what it was? - was gone. He raised his chin bravely and his next words wiped any thought of odd lights from Arthur’s mind.
“Did you kill your last servant, sire?”
__________________________________________________________________
Arthur froze. He felt more then heard Gaius’s gasp behind him and the rattle as the old physician supported his suddenly shaking legs on a shelf.
Merlin weeping on the forest floor, face obscured by the blood streaming from his wound. A wound by Arthur’s hand…
Rolph must have seen something in his eyes because he shrunk back in the chair as far as his wounded shoulder would allow. “I’m sorry my lord, its just the servants’ talk, and I was so afraid, and you were so good to me…” he babbled fearfully. “I just wanted to know, I was afraid, please don’t hurt me my lord please don’t please…I’m sorry, I’m sorry I’m sorry…”
Arthur managed to raise his hand to stem the boy’s flurried stream of apologies. The terror on the boys face struck a cold shard in his heart.
Merlin, eyes closed as he waited for his lord - his friend - to kill him without a thought.
Is this who I am?
“I said there would be no repercussions. You have nothing to fear from me,” Arthur managed to choke from his frozen throat. The fear on the boy’s face eased slightly, but Arthur saw the wariness now that had been behind those perfect bows, that quiet service. The castle servants’ many questions about Merlin’s whereabouts. He buried his face in his hands, knowing by the heavy silence that Gaius was waiting for his answer. Was he really going to do this?
“No,” he said quietly, so quietly as not to be heard if the room had not been so deathly quiet. “I did not.”
The silence was smothering. Arthur lifted his head from his hands and met Gaius’s shocked eyes. The old physician was clutching at the robes above his heart.
“He betrayed me. He did something worthy of death.” Arthur’s gaze returned to Rolph, whose eyes were unreadable.
“But I did not kill him.”
And Arthur rose and left the room. He pretended not to hear the joyous sobs from behind the door as he left.
Or the hint of satisfaction on Rolph's face as he turned away.